Chef’s dad:
Say, would you crackers like to hear about the time we saw the Loch Ness monster?

Stan:
No, that’s okay

Chef’s dad:
Ooh! It must’ve been about seven, eight years ago. Me and the little lady was out on this boat you see,
all alone at night, when all of a sudden this huge creature, this giant crustacean from the paleolithic era,
comes out of the water

Chef’s mom:
We was so scared, Lord have mercy, I jumped up in the boat and I said “Thomas, what on earth is that creature?!”

Chef’s dad:
It stood above us looking down with these big red eyes...

Chef’s mom:
Oh it was so scary!

Chef’s dad:
And I yelled, I said “What do you want from us monster?!” And the monster bent down and said
“I need about treefiddy”

Kyle:
What’s treefiddy?

Chef’s dad:
Three dollars and fifty cents

Chef’s mom:
Treefiddy

Stan:
He wanted money?

Chef’s dad:
That’s right. I said “I ain’t giving you no treefiddy you damn Loch Ness monster! Get your own damn money!”

Chef’s mom:
I gave him a dollar

Chef’s dad:
She gave him a dollar

Chef’s mom:
I thought he’d go away if I gave him a dollar

Chef’s dad:
Well of course he’s not gonna go away! You gave him a dollar, he’s gonna assume you got more