CIMMERIA—Local adventurer and slayer Conan the Barbarian has decided to temporarily lay aside the rich juices of red meat, the stinging wine on his palate, and the mad exultation of battle to pursue an advanced degree in biology at a local university. According to sources, his lack of expertise in biology made it difficult for him to know whose lamentations he was hearing. "This is what is best in life," said Conan to reporters. "To crush my enemies, see them driven before me, and to hear the lamentation of their... uh... crap. Women? Maybe? I dunno. I'm not a biologist....