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© Copyright 2009 CTVglobemedia Publishing Inc. All Rights Reserved. Paul Hellyer in 2002[1 The Article By ROY MacGREGOR 'As far as I'm concerned, it's irrefutable." Paul Hellyer is in his downtown Toronto office on a Saturday morning, just as he is the first five mornings of every week, still driven at 85 years of age. He has been finishing up a book, his 13th, that is part memoir, and so he has been looking back on a remarkable career that once made him Canada's youngest member of Parliament, that took him to key cabinet posts in the governments of...

Good News: You baptized seven people today in the river. Bad News: You lost two of them in the swift current. Good News: The Women's Guild voted to send you a get-well card. Bad News: The vote passed by 19-17. Good News: The Elder Board accepted your job description the way you wrote it. Bad News: They were so inspired by it, they also formed a search committee to find somebody capable of filling the position. Good News: You finally found a choir director who approaches things exactly the same way you do. Bad News: The choir mutinied. Good News:...

OK, folks. We haven't been doing a very good job at keeping the "humor" tag worth keeping. Months come and go, and the same fake news stories appear in my Religion::Humor category. I'M getting tired of seeing my OWN post about Georgetown giving an honorary degree to Satan. So here's at it: An atheist was walking through the woods. "What majestic trees!" "What powerful rivers!" "What beautiful animals!" He said to himself. As he was walking alongside the river, he heard a rustling in the bushes behind him. He turned to look. He saw a 7-foot grizzly bear charge towards...

This information is for Catholics only. It must not be divulged to non Catholics. The less they know about our rituals and code words, the better off they are. AMEN: The only part of a prayer that everyone knows. BULLETIN: Your receipt for attending Mass. CHOIR: A group of people whose singing allows the rest of the Parish to lip-sync. HOLY WATER: A liquid whose chemical formula is H2OLY. HYMN: A song of praise usually sung in a key three octaves higher than that of the congregation's range. RECESSIONAL HYMN: The last song at Mass often sung a little more...

How to determine when Joel Osteen is speaking heresy:

Click the link - http://www.boecomic.com/?p=344

ROME, Italy (CAP) - In the wake of recent Earth Day festivities, the world's most popular deity has announced plans aimed at helping to ease overcrowding on Earth. According to His spokesperson at the Vatican, the Creator in which we're all endowed will conduct a series of layoffs that will ultimately total about 200 million people. "In light of a struggling global economy and oversubscription to a finite amount of natural resources, God has deemed it necessary to take these draconian measures," Pope Benedict XVI said on God's behalf. "As humans, we must work together in the spirit of shared...

The Lockhorns' marriage is like a "Don't Sweat the Details" Catholic's spirituality. This “Get Religion� writer calls a recent Gallup Poll further confirmation that there are four Catholic voter blocs. He identifies them this way: —“Ex-Catholics. Solid for the Democrats.� —“Cultural Catholics who may go to church a few times a year. This may be an undecided voter, but this vote leans to Democrats.� —“Sunday-morning American Catholics. This voter is a regular in the pew and may even play some leadership role in the parish. This is the true Catholic swing vote.� —“The ‘sweats the details’ Roman Catholic who goes...

An old Catholic priest lay dying in the hospital. For years he had faithfully served the people of the nation's capital, Washington, D.C. He motioned for his nurse to come near. "Yes, Father?" said the nurse. "I would really like to see Harry Reid and Nancy Pelosi before I die," whispered the priest. "I'll see what I can do, Father," replied the nurse. The nurse sent the request to them and waited for a response. Soon the word arrived. Harry and Nancy would be delighted to visit the priest. As they went to the hospital, Harry commented to Nancy "I...

In a bold and surprising move, the Holy See today announced that His Excellency Bernard Fellay, General Superior of the Society of St. Pius X, has been named as the new Archbishop of Saint Louis. This appointment was accompanied by a decree from the Congregation for Bishops that provides immediate temporary jurisdiction for SSPX priests and bishops worldwide. This temporary jurisdiction involves the elevation of the SSPX to a personal prelature, but this structure is only granted for 2 years, subject to review. (The link to the Holy See's announcement is down, I guess due to traffic, but I...

Multiple sources from within the COB have confirmed that Robert L. Millet has been chosen by President Monson to fill the recent vacancy in the Quorum of the Twelve. At one level, this move comes as a surprise since those with previous experience as a General Authority are usually chosen. Along with the apostolic appointment comes the news that the Miracle of Forgiveness will be removed from the Church’s downtown museum display on Spencer W. Kimball, and that all traditional interpretations of 2 Nephi 25:23 will be removed from prior Conference Reports. Sources say that Packer, Nelson, and Oaks, have...

VATICAN CITY — An unprecedented summit of Christian leaders convened here earlier this month to take part in a summit to address what many fear could be the greatest spiritual crisis of our time — a shortage of prayer. “With the global economic crisis touching more and more lives around the world, we have just one question,” said Cardinal Sean Patrick O’Malley. “Where is all of the extra prayer that these people need going to come from?” A portion of the summit, which included both evangelical and Catholic leaders from around the world, was focused on finding alternative sources of...

[EXCERPTED] WHEATON — A broad coalition of evangelical theologians has cracked the code of the Book of Revelation, solving its mysteries, metaphors and messages in what is being called a watershed moment in Christian history. "To get this kind of across-the-board agreement is phenomenal," said a spokesman. "Moments like this come along once in a millenium." The key to understanding the book's puzzling enigmas and fundamental message was "hidden in plain sight," say the scholars. The book's purpose and message can be summed up for lay readers as (Excerpt) Read more at larknews.com ...

Sam Alves models a t-shirt showing the parish's approved core values. No doubt you recite the parish's core values daily after reading about them in the bulletin, hearing them in Fr. Creedon homilies and noticing them tattooed on the person in the next pew. Our parish's young people are even reported to be greeting each other by shouting "WSECN," the easy-to-remember acronym of the core values.Of course, all of this didn't happen by accident. What you're seeing is the product of careful evaluation and study. Many of the core values submitted by parishioners and other community members sounded fine...

I never thought I’d see the day, but it happened. The LDS Newsroom has a featured article which includes an official repudiation of the book so many Mormons love to hate: The Miracle of Forgiveness, by Spencer W. Kimball. The book teaches that permanent forgiveness only comes when, as a prerequisite, one first successfully abandons sin both in practice and in the mind—that we must absolutely never commit it again and successfully and permanently purge our minds of the sinful desire. Only then can forgiveness be granted. Obviously, this kind of model of the repentance which brings forgiveness doesn’t realistically...

LONG BEACH, CA - Rev. Daniel Vickers moved to California from Arkansas three years ago. His desire was to plant a church that would reach out to the vast lost population in Southern Cal. Despite his best attempts, Vickers struggled to get anyone to join his church. About six months ago, he realized that he needed to meet the population right where they are. According to Vickers, "When I moved here, I tried to get people to come to a specific location for church. Nobody wanted to do it. I never even had a chance to do any expository preaching...

Often, after victories, athletes like to take a moment to thank God, Jesus, or even the occasional shout out to Allah. But one NMU hockey player stirred up controversy after thanking Our Dark Lord Satan. Melvin Schwarz, a sophomore wood technology major and forward for the Wildcats, thanked Satan for imbuing him with "the strength of the Dark Prince himself." Schwarz has been a self professed Satanist for the past three weeks. According to Schwarz, the conversion has not affected his game play, except for the occasional possession. "As a Satanic-American, I'm entitled to all the rights that Christians are,"...

You've heard of Harvard-Yale, the dapper east Salt Lake City neighborhood with Ivy League street names. But what about King Benjamin's Court in South Jordan, where the roads herald Book of Mormon heroes? How about Olympic Point, a West Jordan subdivision built just before the 2002 Winter Olympics that boasts a Slalom Way, Curling Court, even Picabo Street? There are more than 10,000 streets in the Salt Lake Valley, with more to come as the west side fills up. Finding the right moniker is "a little bit of a science and a little bit of an art," notes Tom Burdett,...

Georgetown University President John J. DeGoya announced today that Satan, Prince of Darkness will receive an honorary doctorate at the University's 220th commencement. DeGoya called the announcement a proud day for Georgetown. "We've been honored to continue the proud tradition of Catholic education which has produced alumni such as President Bill Clinton, Secretary of State Hillary Clinton, and World Spiritual Leader Al Gore, but when Notre Dame scored the Messi-- uh, the President for this year's graduation, well, it didn't seem fair. We felt being named the fighting Irish gave them an unfair advantage with O'bama. The faculty felt like...

A spokesperson for Gov. Jim Gibbons today said the governor will step down to enter the Catholic priesthood. The news jolted members of the Nevada Legislature. “I remember him,” said Sen. Bernice Mathews of Washoe County. “He’s still governor?” In a statement, members of the Assembly Republican Caucus said, “It’s the answer to a prayer.” No reason was given immediately for the governor’s decision, but it was recalled that Gibbons has a somewhat meandering religious history. In the early years of his political career, he listed himself as a Protestant both in the Nevada Legislative Manual and in his congressional...

Fr. Jenkin's response to the growing criticism of his decision to honor Obama at the Notre Dame graduation is remarkably Clintonian.  Fr. Jenkins first says Notre Dame is honored by the president's presence at graduation. He then adds that the school intends to teach Obama about the error of his ways on abortion.  Does anyone really believe that? It has the hollow ring of Obama's own abortion reduction argument.But here is the best line: We are not ignoring the critical issue of the protection of life.  On the contrary, we invited him because we care so much about these issues....

The battle over the Constitutionality of the Pledge of Allegiance has taken a new turn recently, when the activist group Focus on the Masonic Family (FMF) brought a civil action lawsuit against the federal government for not including "under Cthulhu" in the elementary school pseudo-prayer. "American history is steeped in the tradition of the Masonic Order," said the leader of FMF, Grand Master Albert Baker. "Many of the world's greatest thinkers -- including many of our Founding Fathers -- were proud members of the Masonic Order." Indeed, such historic figures as Benjamin Franklin, John Hancock, John Paul Jones, Paul Revere,...

WASHINGTON (CAP) - A coalition of Christian ministries has announced that they intend to move ahead with plans to request federal bailout money to prop up their financially-beleaguered churches. The request - rumored to be in the range of $450 billion - is expected to come as early as next week. "The various churches that we represent have been hard-hit, Lord knows," says Dr. Luther Cole, spokesman for The Lord's Lobby, a religious lobbying group that is spearheading the bailout effort. "Catholic priests paying the little boys off. Fundie churches finding that people are getting real tight with their cash...

"God exists, and he's American" is the judgment of Dr. Milton Glass, fictional nuclear physicist from the acclaimed Alan Moore-Dave Gibbons comic Watchmen, when he learns that Jon Osterman, has come back from the dead. Osterman disputes Glass's judgment, but the new deity's protest rings as hollow as his promise of fealty to his first girlfriend. In the story, Osterman dies in a freak lab accident that is the stuff of countless superhero origin stories. It utterly obliterates his body but leaves his mind intact and powerful. Osterman then re-creates himself from scratch. He is not just reborn but transfigured...

Dear CT: I’ve seen other dubious articles by Paul Apostle in the past, and frankly I’m surprised you felt that his recurrent criticisms of the Church deserved to be printed in your magazine. Mr. Apostle for many years now has had a penchant for thinking he has a right to “mark” certain Christian teachers who don’t agree with his biblical position. Certainly I commend him for desiring to stay faithful to God’s word, but I think he errs in being so dogmatic about his views to the point where he feels free to openly attack his brethren. His attitude makes...

A lot of priests know their way around a kitchen, but the Washington Post this week profiled one who is turning it into his own little apostolate. Take a look: Mass had been over only a few minutes and the Rev. Leo Patalinghug had already traded his green and gold robe for an apron, his priest's collar poking out over the top. He was chopping onions with the speed and flair of a celebrity chef --which he is. Sort of. The unusual cooking demonstration occurred on a recent afternoon at a Catholic bookstore in downtown Washington. About two dozen people...

Sad, but true A dog had followed his fourth grade owner to a public elementary school. However, when the bell rang, the dog sidled inside the building and made it all the way to the child's classroom before a teacher noticed and shooed him outside, closing the door behind him. The dog sat down, whimpered and stared at the closed doors. Then God appeared beside the dog, patted his head, and said, 'Don't feel bad fella'...they won't let ME in either'.

�� 1 �� Things have gotten so bad that there is a guy who is eating bacon, and only bacon, for the entire month of February. At least I know that when the apocalypse comes, this is an option on the list right before eating my neighbors. Just in case I have no bacon, I hope I live next to bacon man. Yummy. �� 2 �� So how much will President Barack Obama's budget cost us taxpayers? Toby Harden does the math. I'm an American taxpayer and the starkest figure is what this could cost me. The latest figure...

IMPLEMENTING RESOLUTION IN SUPPORT OF THE MINISTRY OF ROSTERED INDULGENCES SALESPERSONS “Indulgences must be preached with caution...” Martin Luther, 95 Theses, No. 41 WHEREAS, guided by the Holy Spirit, this church raises up, calls, supports, and maintains rosters of ordained ministers, associates in ministry, deaconesses, and diaconal ministers for public ministry in service of the mission of Christ and seeks faithful to discern in each situation what will best serve that mission; and WHEREAS,some members, congregations, candidacy committees, and synods of the ELCA have discerned gifts and skills for rostered ministry in some people who are or contemplate preaching the...

A Bible Study Youtube for those with a funny bone. Lavishly produced with a cast of thousands...okay, about 20 people were involved...we had a tight budget....'kay, we didn't really have a budget. Enjoy and come to our Bible Study at Second Baptist - Katy, Room 331 at 9:30 AM every Sunday. You'll love it. Lots of creative types and we have all types and ages. Married, single, aged 9 to 100.

Thanks for viewing and this file had been posted under general chat but if you missed it here it is again!

In light of the recent “Honor Killing” on our own soil (and the complete lack of media attention), the religion of Islam needs a healthy dose of criticism. Sure, I could have made a video about Christianity or Buddhism (only to receive a handful of respectfully scolding letters)… But what’s the fun in that?! Read your Qur’an.

Thanks for viewing! This is short video of three pigs with inspiration. I have redone this video a little different. I am trying get this message out!

Now, let us pray for our New Leader, much like our Pastor prayed two Sundays in a row: “Dear God, please help Barak Obama. Lord, surround him with Godly men. Father, please do not let any of his circle give him evil advice. I was not old enough to pray this prayer for Hitler as he slaughtered millions of Jews, but Lord, You've given me a second chance, an even better opportunity than the one I missed when I was too young to pray for the Fuhrer. Now Lord, please bring our children serving overseas home from all that vicious...

A cheerful wave of the deacon's stole to Doc Mac, who reminds us that today marks a little milestone in broadcast history, when Fulton Sheen made his TV debut. The good doctor quotes one writer who described the archbishop's appeal thusly: He was elegant, elevated, relaxed, often very funny. Only Jack Benny could top Sheen’s ability to back a punch line—gazing calmly at the camera the entire time. The shows had a precise formula. Sheen, wearing his bishop’s cross, crimson cape and skullcap, would stride into a parlorlike studio, pause, tell a funny story, and then pose the problem...

Hollywood icon Tom Hanks is sorry for calling Mormons who supported California’s gay marriage ban “un-American.” “Everyone has a right to vote their conscience; nothing could be more American. To say members of the Church of Jesus Christ of Latter Day Saints who contributed to Proposition 8 are ‘un-American’ creates more division when the time calls for respectful disagreement. No one should use ‘un-American’ lightly or in haste. I did. I should not have.” Hanks concluded his sensitive remarks by saying, “To show how much I love Mormons, I’d like to buy every one of them a beer.” He didn’t...

Even God needs a little bit of extra help sometimes. And with congregations in terminal decline, desperate churches are turning to increasingly imaginative means to draw in worshippers. Witty clergy around the country are now using tongue-in-cheek posters to try and lure in amused punters and boost their dwindling congregation. These hilarious signs outside churches have tickled believers and non-believers nationwide - they bring a whole new meaning to the phrase 'laughing in the aisles'.

The Catholic Church: The First 2000 Years by Martha Rasmussen is a popular overview and study guide to the history of the Catholic Church. Written for non-scholarly readers with little historical background, it includes descriptions of society in different historical eras in order to make the history of the Church more understandable. The book explains important doctrinal, spiritual, and historical questions and developments. It identifies many popular saints and includes interesting historical characters. Catholics seeking a deeper spiritual life and a closer relationship with God will find many helpful ideas to trust God’s love and care for them. The story...

Serious questions have been raised over the validity of the study. A rebuttal report by Walt Samson of the University of Arkansas' School of Veterinary Medicine contained two potential flaws. "First of all, it is not fair to compare the Southern Baptist at his peak grazing season with the Black Bear that is coming out of hibernation for short periods of time during December. Secondly, there are questions regarding the differences in measurement technique. Black bear sizes were determined by estimation using triangulation and photography while the bear was standing upright. The Southern Baptist in the study were typically measured...

I understand it when the idolatrous PETA people who worship jackrabbits over Jesus get their panties in a wad over hunting. I expect it, I like it and—truth be told—I’d really miss it if they did not pop a blood vein in their forehead when smacked with the facts. However, lately I’ve been getting hate mail and weird looks from “Christians” who ardently believe that God, Jesus, Moses, John, Paul, George and Ringo (I know, they get them confused) are, supposedly, vehemently opposed to hunting animals (they’re right about McCartney). I have even had some sassy Christians say that fishing...

This was an amusing cartoon posted but not drawn by Brian Saint-Paul. Enjoy it.

So it's 2009, and I'm not all that impressed so far. Just another day. It has weather. There's some news. But there's always weather and there's always news. When I was a kid, the minutes crawled by. So much time that I had no idea how to fill it. "There's nothing to do." That didn't happen to me very often, because there was always a book. Or plastic American bricks (this was before Legos got to the U.S.), or my HO scale train set, or brothers and sisters who thought Careers or Monopoly or Risk were a good idea. The...

Inspired by William Safire's annual Office Pool of predictions for the coming year, I am herewith inaugurating a "Catholic Pool" for 2009. Safire's 2009 NYT pool column ran last Sunday, and you have to hand it to him for keeping it going even though he has an almost unbroken record of guessing wrong. Perhaps it is wishful thinking on his part; perhaps it is the peril of being a conservative in a bad decade (or generation) for Republicans. In any case, I shall not be critical, as I am jumping into the deep end myself. And I'll even go all...

The parents of the popular Peanuts character Charlie Brown were arrested last night for child endangerment, neglect and other charges related to the effective abandonment of their children. The Brown child also has many bruises, some considered severe. The child claimed he received the abrasions from attempting to kick a football but authorities are skeptical. Police said there are just too many bruises to be explained by that. Oddly, the Brown's dog seems exceptionally well fed and content. The child being bald, some fear, is indicative of malnourishment. This is ironic because Brown's father (pictured below) is alleged to be...

Baxter, Tennessee— After a long battle of back and forth name calling, sits-ins, and a news media frenzy the American Civil Liberties Union Foundation on Friday dropped a lawsuit against the small town of Baxter, the county seat of Smith County, Tennessee. Complaints were first reported to the ACLU-TN on August 24th after Baxter County Courthouse employees erected a nativity and decorated a Christmas tree on the front lawn of the courthouse to begin Christmas celebrations. “Religious displays in front of homes and churches are protected by the first amendment,” Harry Reasoning, ACLU-TN spokesman, was quoted in local papers in...

Every other year or so at about this time I get to do a Christmas List column. It's not every year because it would get tired, and people would come after me with pitchforks. Let me emphasize that most of the items on this list (except that last one) are cheap, like me. They can be purchased at your local hardware store, and some will even fit in stockings. -- Cast-iron frypan. These come in many sizes, some quite small, so you can still do the stocking thing. It's astounding how many people don't have cast-iron frypans and have never...

This is a short Christmas special of animal humor that will bring a smile or laughter and is suitable for all ages! Merry Christmas All!

Swedish public pool to rent out burkinis Published: 8 Dec 08 13:59 CETOnline: http://www.thelocal.se/16210/20081208/ New feature Double click on a word to get a translationIn a nod to women not wishing to reveal too much, an indoor public swimming pool in Sweden has begun renting out burkinis, full-body swimsuits that cover everything but the face, hands, and feet. Fresh blow for topless Swedish bathers (21 May 08)Muslim mum discrimination case headed to Supreme Court (27 Feb 08)Topless Swedish bathers: 'They're just breasts' (12 Nov 07)For 30 kronor ($3.75), the Stadsparksbadet pool in Borås in western Sweden now offers bathers...

From Ernie’s 3D Pancakes, perhaps the best holiday gift ever — the Plush Plagues Bag for Passover! Yes, you can have soft fuzzy representations of each of the ten plagues sent by Yahweh to annoy the Egyptians into letting Moses and his people go. Types of pestilence represented include: - A spooky eyed drop of blood - A Frog — for frogs, of course - A Giant Lice for lice. - Cow for cattle disease - Black Locust for locusts - A white satin lump of hail - A black cube of darkness - An icky boil on a piece...