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Humor (Bloggers & Personal)

Brevity: Headers | « Text »
  • STOP HER!

    07/27/2016 5:44:18 AM PDT · by NOBO2012 · 10 replies
    Michelle Obama's Mirror ^ | 7-27-2016 | MOTUS
    Remember the RNC’s daily themes? Make America Safe Again, Make America Work Again, Make America First Again and Make America One Again? And while the Dems mocked the themes that didn’t stop them from purloining the theme-of-the-day concept for their own convention.Day 1 theme: BLM – Bernie Lives (don’t) Matter, aka "United Together." If by “united” you mean divided Bernie Bro haz a sadand by “together” you mean not so much.Day 2 theme: BLM – Blue Lives (don’t) Matter, in which  "Mothers of the Movement" were featured speakers of the evening.Brought to you by the party responsible for creating the...
  • Michelle Obama Brings It: Convention Bump to Follow

    07/26/2016 5:18:18 AM PDT · by NOBO2012 · 27 replies
    Michelle Obama's Mirror ^ | 7-26-2016 | MOTUS
    Boy, Lady M really brought it last night. It only took 7 1/2 years and untold billions of dollars – butt behold, a FLOTUS who’s ready for prime time. Dress, age appropriate; voice, toned down (sorry, pretty sure that’s a sexist microaggression of some sort). And I think she’s been taking speech lessons from Hillary’s voice coach.  Unfortunately, even with the coaching, she still schtruggled a little with those pesky “st” words like “schtronger,” “schtrength,” and “shtriving:” butt bless her heart, she tried. “We cannot afford to be tired or frush-trated or cynical.”All while managing to keep race front and...
  • Sgt. Schultz and Hillary: "I Know Nothing"

    07/25/2016 5:24:13 AM PDT · by NOBO2012 · 10 replies
    Michelle Obama's Mirror ^ | 7-25-2016 | MOTUS
    You remember the “Vast Right Wing Conspiracy:”Behold, the 21st century version:  “the Hillary Standard.” "I often feel like there's the Hillary standard and then there's the standard for everybody else," she told CBS. And, strangely, many of her opponents agree with her assessment. @60Minutes @HillaryClinton FBI Dir. Comey agrees pic.twitter.com/StIG0ShmGL— Antonio (@Antonio9847) July 25, 2016 Here are some excerpts (outtakes, as the questions about the DNC emails didn’t make it to the final cut) from the 60 Minutes interview with Hillary yesterday: "No, I didn't know anything about it, and I haven't read any of those," Clinton responded."Again, I don't...
  • I Think My Dog's a Democrat Bryan Lewis Official Video .

    07/24/2016 9:46:03 PM PDT · by Utilizer · 14 replies
    uuuuu't-uuuuubbeh ^ | May 5, 2016 | Bryan Lewis
    Published on May 5, 2016 I Think My Dog's a Democrat Music Video Bryan Lewis Hilarious or should we say "Hillaryous" Buy single on iTunes http://itunes.apple.com/album/id11114... Category Entertainment License Standard YouTube License
  • Back To Our Roots (I hope that’s not considered a microaggresion)

    07/24/2016 5:32:30 AM PDT · by NOBO2012 · 6 replies
    Michelle Obama's Mirror ^ | 7-24-2016 | MOTUS
    I know: there are some Dems calling for Debbie Wasserman Schultz to be dumped as head of the DNC. Her offense? Leaked emails. Boy those Dems are tough on leakers! Now do you understand why Hillary went to such lengths to ensure nobody would ever be able to see her official emails?Butt enough of that, I have bigger fish to fry. Today I’m going back to my roots – reflecting the fashion iconery of our FLOTUS. For all of you doubters out there who’ve questioned – sometimes not so graciously – Lady M’s status as a fashion forward icon, I...
  • Bon Appétit!

    07/23/2016 5:49:44 AM PDT · by NOBO2012 · 31 replies
    Michelle Obama's Mirror ^ | 7-23-2016 | MOTUS
    I don’t know about you butt I’m sick of the sick world and need a day off. Let’s go to the farmers market!In my neck of the woods it’s peak season…for lots of things. Tomatoes – heirloom or otherwise:Corn:Blueberries:Peppers, mild and HOT!Etc.Etc.Etc. If you can’t find something here to make you happy, you’re doing something wrong. So let’s get those summer recipes rolling – even if it’s just luscious ripe tomatoes,luxurious buratta (Bel Gioioso brand now available at Costco if you can eat 8 balls within a week – and who can’t?),fresh basil, olive oil and grilled bread.Toss in some...
  • The Triple Double Shotgun

    07/22/2016 10:45:36 AM PDT · by w1n1 · 17 replies
    AShooting Journal ^ | 7/22/2016 | C Bailey
    You read right, this beast of a shotgun has 6 barrels and holds 48 rounds at a time. The ultimate zombie apocalypse weapon. Triple double is usually a term thrown around in basketball. Not so much in shotgun lingo. Double barrel shotguns are awesome. But you know what they are not as awesome as? A triple double shotgun. The guys from Demolition Ranch brings us one of the coolest and craziest guns you will ever see. Sure it is super heavy and quite uncomfortable and to be honest, not practical whats so ever. But that doesn’t matter because it is...
  • Prouder, Stronger, Better

    07/22/2016 5:51:07 AM PDT · by NOBO2012 · 1 replies
    Michelle Obama's Mirror ^ | 7-22-2016 | MOTUS
    Take heart, it may well be morning in America again.And I can assure you of one thing, with words like this: Together, we will lead our party back to the White House, and we will lead our country back to safety, prosperity, and peace. We will be a country of generosity and warmth. But we will also be a country of law and order. The most important difference between our plan and that of our opponents, is that our plan will put America First. Americanism, not globalism, will be our credo.We are going to build a great border wall to...
  • FBI Director James Comey Recommends Indictment of Melania Trump And Ivanka Trump [Satire]

    07/21/2016 7:22:24 PM PDT · by kiryandil · 10 replies
    July 21, 2016 | moi
    FBI Director James Comey today recommended that Melania Trump be indicted for a felony violation of an obscure Federal law involving "plagiarism". Comey would not name the Federal law, because 1) it's an active investigation and 2) Attorney General Loretta Lynch has not yet met privately with former president "Bent" Bill Clinton and presidential hopeful "Crooked" Hillary Clinton on a plane somewhere in order to craft the wording of the Federal law. Comey also recommended that both Melania and Ivanka Trump be prosecuted for the new Federal crime of "Being Hotter Than Michelle "The Wookie" & "Crooked" Hillary", a felony...
  • Steven Crowder *LIVE* Thursday Podcast

    07/21/2016 5:19:26 PM PDT · by PROCON · 11 replies
    louderwithcrowder.com ^ | July 21, 2016 | Steven Crowder
    Steven Crowder *LIVE* Thursday Podcast5PM PDT/8PM EDT *LIVE* Podcast Join Steven Crowder as he discusses current events using his humorous and often irreverent style.The podcast usually runs around 2 1/2 hours and is filled with his own satirical wit and interviews with a variety of guests of all political persuasions.
  • Squirrel Escapes Death from Hawk by Ejecting

    07/21/2016 6:52:18 AM PDT · by w1n1 · 19 replies
    Cal Sportsman ^ | 7/21/2016 | C Bailey
    Blast off! Watch as this squirrel leaps from tree and escapes from being this hawk’s lunch. Many scenarios in life require the fight or flight instinct. It is pretty clear which one this squirrel chose in his near death experience. This brown squirrel went from being dead meat to a flying squirrel in a matter of seconds. Like something out of a movie, it looks as if the squirrel hit Inspector Gadget’s ejector button as he launches from the greenery and into the blue sky. The squirrel lives to see another day and is telling all his squirrel buddies what...
  • RNC Day 3: That’s Mighty Red, White and Blue of You

    07/21/2016 5:27:36 AM PDT · by NOBO2012 · 4 replies
    Michelle Obama's Mirror ^ | 7-21-2016 | MOTUS
    RNC, day 3. Here’s my rundown.Laura Ingraham – I like to call her “Dr. Laura” butt will restrain from doing so for fear of driving more  potential new readers away due to “having my head up my butt” – was great. Loved the way she went after the the skinny jeans, man-bun wearing pajama boys.I’m still a bit cheezed about her cheezing in on my gig, butt I’m going to be classy and set that aside for the good of the party. Besides, I think she’d make an awesome replacement for Megyn.Ted Cruz disappointed. I better leave it at that....
  • This Bear is all Business

    07/20/2016 7:19:28 AM PDT · by w1n1 · 7 replies
    AK Sportsman ^ | 7/20/2016 | E Nestor
    Check out this bear cub fight a cop. Luckily for this guy, this bear is just a cub. Bears when fully grown is best not to mess with one. Well that is unless it is a pet bear cub. This little bear has plenty of fight in it even though it is still pint sized. Give it a few months and this police officer would have no chance in hand to hand combat with a determined bear. While we do not know any specifics on this video, we do know this little bear is not to be messed with. Who...
  • Boris Johnson Sidesteps Apology For Insulting Obama, Clinton

    07/20/2016 4:59:42 AM PDT · by sinsofsolarempirefan · 11 replies
    Reuters ^ | 07/19/16 | Reuters
    Newly appointed Foreign Secretary Boris Johnson and the US Secretary of State, John Kerry, meet in London to discuss the relationship between the UK and US. In an occasionally awkward press conference, the Foreign Secretary was challenged by US journalists about "outright lies" he had told and articles he had written about the current president and his potential successor
  • John Kerry does Chevy Chase doing Jerry Ford

    07/20/2016 4:42:59 AM PDT · by NOBO2012 · 5 replies
    Michelle Obama's Mirror ^ | 7-20-2016 | MOTUS
    RNC day 2: Christie was great, Donald Jr. killed it, Dr. Carson appeared to have found his inner-Disney. Had he been even half as animated during the campaign we’d all be sporting Carson ‘16 bumper stickers right now.Butt the real reason the Republicans will win in November? This - the door is closing in the face of America:Let’s hope that the rest of the world will follow Britain’s lead and continue to close the door in the face of globalism. If not, we will still make America great again by closing our door to illegal immigrants, terrorism and unbalanced trade...
  • Love-In-The-Mist

    07/19/2016 5:15:41 AM PDT · by NOBO2012 · 4 replies
    Michelle Obama's Mirror ^ | 7-19-2016 | MOTUS
    The RNC, day 1. A little drama as Trump’s team beat down a rebellion on the floor led by the Hillary-by-Proxy arm of the Republican Party. The Donald seems to have learned  quickly how to use the  “rigged system” to his benefit. Good.Many speakers: Marcus Lutrell, Sheriff David Clark, Patricia Smith, Rudy Giuliani, Melania…  I didn’t love the water-wings dress butt she could wear a potato sack and look good. And of course there was Tiger’s sister, our honorary MOTI, speaking of her son, Mesa Police Sergeant Brandon Mendoza, killed by a drunk illegal immigrant in a car crash. That’s...
  • America’s Insurance Policy

    07/18/2016 6:13:16 AM PDT · by NOBO2012 · 11 replies
    Michelle Obama's Mirror ^ | 7-18-2016 | MOTUS
    Because it was in the middle of the afternoon and because it was Shep Smith I wondered if anyone else had seen this exchange in which Shep chastised Governor Jindal for using an offensive term:The answer was a resounding yes. The offensive term? “All Lives Matter.” It takes a special kind of stupid to berate a former governor for using an innocuous term that some people have decided is objectionable. “Very, very divisive phrase – I don’t understand…so unhelpful.” “Why would you…I don’t understand why you’d say that?” Said by Shep with that tone of superiority made up of equal parts...
  • Obama may have confused ISIS with Isis

    07/17/2016 1:19:49 PM PDT · by DanMiller · 13 replies
    Dan Miller's Blog ^ | July 17, 2016 | Dan Miller
    Obama constantly tells us that ISIS (The Islamic State) has nothing to do with Islam, even though Islam is its foundation. However Isis, the Egyptian goddess of health, marriage, and wisdom, plainly had nothing to do with Islam. If Obama's references are actually to Isis, then His characterization is true. After the silly stuff, there are some pertinent videos about the ongoing Islamist conquest of America under Obama. First, a not-very-funny attempt at humor on a very unfunny topic. Not  Islamist terrorist Not Isis' followers   Not Egyptian goddesses The Cultural Appropriation Is our Right (CAIR) organization praised Obama for His appropriation...
  • Damned If I Know

    07/17/2016 5:12:14 AM PDT · by NOBO2012 · 6 replies
    Michelle Obama's Mirror ^ | 7-17-2016 | MOTUS
    Lady M welcomed this year’s winners of the fifth annual Healthy Lunchtime Challenge and Kids’ State Dinner contest to the White House last week. Ever the Fashion Icon and Busy Mom™ she sported an on trend “white floral number with black piping and dainty bows at the sleeves” - and caterpillar eyebrows: Here’s one of the winning recipes, served at the luncheon, from Lily Radtke, Age 11. She calls it Asian in Arkansas:“Ewww! Brown Rice Wrappers!?!  And Naked Soybeans? I wouldn’t feed that to the dog!”For the Spring Rolls4 ounces vermicelli rice noodles 1 tablespoon olive oil ½ pound shrimp, peeled,...
  • Turkey Drop**

    07/16/2016 4:54:12 AM PDT · by NOBO2012 · 13 replies
    Michelle Obama's Mirror ^ | 7-16-2016 | MOTUS
    Unfortunately it appears that Turkey’s military coup – which had admiral objectives -   “Turkish Armed Forces have completely taken over the administration of the country to reinstate constitutional order, human rights and freedoms, the rule of law and the general security.” failed. So constitutional order remains wobbly, human rights and freedoms remain subjugated to Islam, the rule of law continues to be subjugated to sharia and general security threatened. Obama is pleased the Islamic autocrat has triumphed. Birds of a feather, so to speak, although apparently not water proof.President Recep Tayyip Erdogan and President Barack Hussein Obama in the Rose Garden,...