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Humor (Bloggers & Personal)

Brevity: Headers | « Text »
  • A Hair Club For Liberals Only?

    04/17/2013 4:47:54 PM PDT · by The Looking Spoon · 2 replies
    The Looking Spoon ^ | 4-17-13 | The Looking Spoon
  • Obama's Investigation Strategy, Don't Act Stupidly; Round Up the Usual Suspects: Bitter Clingers

    04/17/2013 10:08:20 AM PDT · by NOBO2012 · 10 replies
    Michelle Obama's Mirror ^ | 4-17-2013 | MOTUS
    We have no idea who the Boston Bomber is. So before anybody goes off and starts acting stupidly on their own, let me reiterate that the Saudi student who just came to America for a better life is neither a suspect or even a person of interest at this time. And according to his fellow Saudi student roommate, Mohammed Hassan Bada, “he’s sweet and kind and a good person.” Just like American Taliban fighter, John Walker Lindh. “He’s a really good boy” So just because Al Qaeda’s magazine Inspire published an article on how to construct a bomb in a...
  • Tax-Season Humor

    04/17/2013 7:15:48 AM PDT · by Reaganite Republican · 9 replies
    Reaganite Republican ^ | 17 April 2013 | Reaganite Republican
    A man walks into a store followed by his 10-y.o. son. The boy is spinning a quarter in the air and catching it between his teeth. While walking through the store someone bumps into the boy and the coin goes straight into his mouth, lodging in his throat. He immediately starts choking and going blue in the face, so dad starts panicking and shouts and screams for help. A middle aged, fairly unnoticeable man in a gray suit is sitting at the snack bar in the store reading his newspaper and sipping a cup of coffee. At the sound of...
  • A Low-Information Voter's Guide to Politics

    04/16/2013 8:44:05 PM PDT · by cunning_fish · 1 replies
    The People's Cube ^ | 3/4/2013, 1:00 pm | Red Square
    Are you typically lost when co-workers discuss current events around the water cooler? Do you have trouble figuring out the national debt or who that Ben Ghazi dude is, but you know exactly what's on Britney Spears' grocery list? If you think you only deserve fun answers to all life's questions… you're right! This primer will help you look smart and morally superior in any political discussion. Just memorize these big words, explained in easy terms you already know from TMZ and The Daily Show: BIASED: If you have a weird friend who goes to church and her parents are...
  • Response to a Bloomberg anti-freedom Campaign

    04/16/2013 3:23:54 PM PDT · by marktwain · 2 replies
    Gun Watch ^ | 17 April, 2013 | Dean Weingarten
    An Internet friend relayed this experience to me: A Moment Of Glee I got a phone call today from a true believer, paid for by Mayor Bloomberg. Supposedly from the “Gabby Giffords Campaign Against Gun Violence”, asking me to contact my congressman and senators to demand gun control. I about hurt myself trying to keep cool and reel him in. Such opportunities are very rare. So many ways to mess with their heads. Probably the best zinger was when I asked how Gabby Giffords *husband*, Mark Kelly was doing. What do you mean? Well, he confessed to committing a serious...
  • Obama Explains To North Korea Why Destroying America Is A Waste Of Their Time

    04/16/2013 11:53:44 AM PDT · by The Looking Spoon · 5 replies
    The Looking Spoon ^ | 4-16-13 | The Looking Spoon
  • Man Faces Charges for Shooting Bear

    04/16/2013 11:04:38 AM PDT · by John Semmens · 9 replies
    Semi-News/Semi-Satire | 13 Apr 2013 | John Semmens
    A 76-year-old Massachusetts man is facing weapons charges for shooting a bear in his backyard. Richard Ahlstrand of Auburn Massachusetts shot the bear when the 400 lb. animal attacked him as he was tending the bird-feeders he keeps on his property. According to Massachusetts authorities, Ahlstrand should have called animal control officers to handle the wayward bear. “The State employs professionals trained in safe animal removal,” Rufus Bustard, spokesman for Massachusetts Attorney General. “A phone call would have brought these professionals to the scene within a matter of hours.” Bustard dismissed Ahlstrand’s assertion that he had only seconds to defend...
  • Tax Day Reality Bites, Don't It? Obama Thinks You're "Rich"

    04/16/2013 8:46:14 AM PDT · by NOBO2012 · 4 replies
    Michelle Obama's Mirror ^ | 4-16-2013 | MOTUS
    Thoughts and prayers this morning for yesterday’s bombing victims and their families. I know there has been talk about the Marathon Bomber being a disgruntled Tea Partier (well okay, it was just Tingles and CNN dufus, Peter Bergen, who came right out and said it, butt you know others were hoping thinking it too.) From what I hear via Little Mo that is very unlikely. Here’s part of the report he filed late last night: “Authorities say they are searching for a darker skinned or black male with a black backpack and black sweatshirt, possibly foreign national from the accent...
  • Why Paying Taxes Can Never Be Considered Theft...

    04/15/2013 11:24:56 AM PDT · by The Looking Spoon · 3 replies
    The Looking Spoon ^ | 4-15-13 | The Looking Spoon
    Obviously there is an element of sarcasm to this. Happy tax day. Created this to be posted/shared on Facebook (hence the "like" button).
  • They Had Enough for Garden Tours But They Still Want More...TODAY!!!

    04/15/2013 9:45:32 AM PDT · by NOBO2012
    Michelle Obama's Mirror ^ | 4-15-2013 | MOTUS
    I did tell you, didn’t I, that the Spring Garden Tours were given a stay of execution? Tours of the White House itself remained canceled because the cuts have left Secret Service short on manpower to staff them. But there will be enough agents to staff the garden tours, the official said. Beautiful spring day, and the lines were long Yes, despite being sequestered in round one of the Big White’s Sequester Gesture along with the Big White tours for little children, we reinstated the garden tours when somebody pointed out that we didn’t really need extra Secret Service personnel...
  • CARTOON: Assault Shaker

    04/15/2013 9:05:42 AM PDT · by daletoons · 15 replies
    Out of Order Blog ^ | 4-15-13 | Dale
    Here's a little something to keep Michael Bloomberg awake at night. Has no one thought to background check this little girl? Since 1914 she has radically changed her appearance no less than six times (presumably, to elude capture by the authorities). No longer content to merely dump salt wherever she goes, this murderous miss is on the warpath, armed with scary looking technology. As the Democrats and Republicons in the Senate "debate" away our Second Amendment freedoms, let's hope they won't overlook the other menaces that threaten the left.
  • Best Bar Joke Ever

    04/14/2013 3:01:42 PM PDT · by oldbrowser · 41 replies
    email | unknown | unknown
    BEST BAR JOKE EVER! A lawyer, an Illegal alien, a pathological liar, a Muslim, and a Communist walk into a bar. Bartender asks... "What'll it be, Mr. President?"
  • WaPo Shocked to Find Obama Most Polarizing Prezzy Ever!!! Shocking!!!

    04/14/2013 11:36:53 AM PDT · by NOBO2012 · 16 replies
    Michelle Obama's Mirror ^ | 4-13-2013 | MOTUS
    I thought there must be something wrong with my news feed: “Obama’s ratings have been consistently among the most polarized for a president in the last 60 years.” And there was - it was actually an old feed, from way last year. Here’s the latest take on the polarization problem: it’s all Maggie’s fault. That’s right, it turns out, Margaret Thatcher is responsible for all of today’s rancorous polarization, along with all of the assorted political “derangement syndromes.” To the many accomplishments for which the late Margaret Thatcher is now rightly being celebrated, let us add one that is usually...
  • Reaganite's Sunday Funnies

    04/14/2013 4:12:24 AM PDT · by Reaganite Republican · 2 replies
    Reaganite Republican ^ | 14 April 2013 | Reaganite Republican
    More at Reaganite Republican...
  • Obama's Teleprompter (TOTUS) Kidnapper Sentenced

    04/13/2013 9:05:27 AM PDT · by NOBO2012 · 2 replies
    Michelle Obama's Mirror ^ | 4-12-2013 | MOTUS
    I know you remember that horrifying day in October, 2011 when TOTUS was kidnapped and held hostage. TOTUS, blindfolded and held hostage at the Holiday Inn Express In the early days following TOTUS’ disappearance, Big White spokesboy Jay-C said investigators “could not rule out terrorism.” “The dangers posed to the free world by this heinous act can not be overstated.” Jay-C went on to explain this kidnapping could not have come at a worse time as Big Guy’s backup, TOTUS-Too, was also out of service, preventing Big Guy from doing any public speaking. TOTUS-Too has a nervous breakdown and shatters...
  • Does Rand Paul Support Amnesty? Yes

    04/13/2013 3:00:06 AM PDT · by Celtic_Storm · 8 replies
    Frontpage Magazine ^ | 3-20-13 | Daniel Greenfield
  • The One Thing That Makes Kim Jong Un Feel Sad...

    04/12/2013 5:29:47 PM PDT · by The Looking Spoon · 8 replies
    The Looking Spoon ^ | 4-12-13 | The Looking Spoon
    This concept isn't original, I took it from this cartoon (can't make out the cartoonist's signature, but I'll gladly link to them when I can find out).A drawn cartoon is one thing, but I wanted to see how it would turn out as a photoshop. I'm pretty happy with it.
  • NOBODY Exploits Victims Like The Obamas...NO-BOD-Y!!!

    04/12/2013 10:21:29 AM PDT · by NOBO2012
    Michelle Obama's Mirror ^ | 4-11-2013 | MOTUS
    Let me see if I’ve got this right: We now know that NoKo has the capacity to put nuclear warheads on missiles (i.e. start WWIII), butt Congress is focused on eliminating infringing placing common-sense limitations on American’s Second Amendment rights? I guess that makes sense. To that end, we sent out our administration’s two best experts on guns: Joey and Lady M. UPDATED With Traveling Music (h/t: Jackie Gleason) to Honor Their Performance! “Nobody Does It Better”: Carly Simon First up, Joey B, with his own explanation for why people want guns: “It used to be we were dealing almost...
  • US Financial Industry to Replace the Dollar with Food Stamps

    04/11/2013 5:55:49 PM PDT · by markomalley · 4 replies
    The People's Cube ^ | 4/11/2013 | Igor Toutellalai
    As experts ponder the implications of America's stepping-back from world political leadership, finance professionals are openly discussing what the world will be like without the US dollar as the primary unit of international and domestic trade. In the meantime, American businesses are considering the benefits of a new economy based on food stamps. "While the dollar's future is glum, the food stamp is on its ascendency," said Melanie Carnegie, a senior financial analyst at the non-partisan Cloward-Piven Strategy Institute in Washington, DC. "We at Cloward-Piven are actively working with big corporations, such as J.P. Morgan and Xerox, to get them...
  • Did Obama Send A Card to Brother George On International Siblings Day???

    04/11/2013 9:24:55 AM PDT · by NOBO2012 · 2 replies
    Michelle Obama's Mirror ^ | 4-11-2013 | MOTUS
    Did you remember that yesterday was National Siblings Day? Did you send your siblings a card? No? Neither did Big Guy. Not only because he was so busy, butt because he just can’t keep track of them all. In addition to half sister Maya Soetoro-Ng, he has so many half-sibs in Kenya that we don’t even bother exchanging Kwanza cards anymore. And besides his blood sibs, there are literally thousands more that Big Guy considers brothers is spirit. For example: There are Big Guy’s soul brothers,     his doobie brothers   The Choom Gang his Brooks brothers,   Stylin’...