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Help...I have a Kool-Aid drinking Mind Numb Liberal Cousin! (My cousin's Christmas letter)
My Cousin's Annual Christmas Letter to the Family
| 12-9-01
| Norm Klimek
Posted on 12/09/2001 5:36:43 PM PST by Rash32
It's that time of year again, when I send out the latest updates for the year. And what a year indeed! First, I must get in my "told you so!" Yep, Bush is flushing 10 years of prosperity down the toilet faster than you can say Hail Mary! Fortunately the devastation has not yet hit us too hard in Colorado. Matthew is in kindergarten, Sean in second grade. Marsha is working at home with an Internet based order entry job. My work is going well, the economy has not yet hit us. We went to Montana to see Aunt Lisa this summer. We put a TV and VCR in the Caravan and it actually went fairly well. So travel is now becoming more possible. Lucy has chewed up everything and is now bigger than Matthew. She is a Golden Retriever and we hope to breed her next year. We want to wish everyone a very merry Christmas and that next year will bring better times for us all.
OK, so I lost a lot of investment money this year, but Mr. Bush got us a 600.00 rebate check! I would have rather seen it go to a prescription drug benefit for the elderly. Yes, the Grinch stole our prosperity and gave it to the rich. I would bet my salvation that Jesus does not approve of the Republican economic policy, especially right around the holidays. Of course, there is the convenient excuse of September 11th. As we return to the memories of the 80's, let us consider the 241 unarmed marines who died in Lebanon. The cargo planes full of weapons sent to Iran in exchange for hostages, to Bin Laden to fight the Soviets and to Saddam to fight Iran. I believe Dubya is doing a good job of cleaning up the mess his Dad left, but the economy was tanking long before 9-11. Don't insult this country by having a draft dodger use terrorism created from his dad's mistakes to give money to the rich. It turns out the anthrax was domestic with the culprit (like Oklahoma City) having Right wing Politics. The FBI reached that conclusion as only Liberals have been targeted. Surely Mr. Ashcroft will solve the case. Let's hope the war on terrorism will focus on the American Taliban next, our own right wing.
I have a holiday recipe for fundamentalist soufflé - mix a heavy dose of fundamentalism with government, with easy access to guns. Mix in some religion based education with low tax rates and school vouchers. Skin away all investment in infrastructure, diverting all resources to the military. Strip away social programs with a clever, then beat the women until they are tender. Remove all intellectuals and then sprinkle with school prayer. Bake for 10 years and then simmer until buildings start blowing up. Any intolerant religion works nicely!
TOPICS: Miscellaneous; News/Current Events
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My cousin is a hopeless liberal but I would very much like to put him in his place with a short one or two line responce. I thought fellow Freepers could help me deliver the proper responce to my cousin's diatribe.
1
posted on
12/09/2001 5:36:43 PM PST
by
Rash32
To: Rash32
He sounds hopeless to me. I think the only proper response is to tell him to f#%* off. Or maybe just return the letter with a note saying you don't accept junk mail. I can't see what his hysterical outburst has to do with Christmas anyway. This guy is a lost cause. Avoid him at the family dinner.
2
posted on
12/09/2001 5:43:38 PM PST
by
speedy
To: Rash32
Refer him to the latest George Carlin HBO special. Not that George has a thing in the world to say politically but he has some very apropo comments for people who send out update letters. I get them confused (memory not so hot) but I 'think' being found to have inoperable cancer on the base of the spine has something to do with it.
3
posted on
12/09/2001 5:43:47 PM PST
by
mercy
To: Rash32
Don't insult this country by having a draft dodger use terrorism created from his dad's mistakes to give money to the rich. Ummm....Draft Dodger? Bush served in the military, Gore served in the military....only draft dodger I can think of is Clinton....
I know, it's not something you can use in a come back...
To: Rash32
Where most liberals usually get about 10% of their "facts" correct, it appears your cousin was a perfect ZERO percent. This person should be congratulated on their consistency.
Bottom line: this person is clearly ignorant of the facts and too long gone to help. You'd be better off just ignoring these jabs, as you'll never change the person's attitude. JMHO.
To: Rash32
too bad he didn't mention that matthew is 14, sean is 22, and marsha the spammer is there because of the court-ordered ankle bracelet.
the correct response is to stuff the thing back into the envelope, write "opened by mistake" on the back, and on the front write "moved -- left no forwarding address" and then drop it in the mailbox.
dep
6
posted on
12/09/2001 5:45:27 PM PST
by
dep
To: Rash32
Perhaps you should ask to be removed from the mailing list, or send one of your own to all who received the same letter.
To: Rash32
The recession OFFICIALLY started sometime toward the end of 2000. We all saw it coming ... tech stocks fell apart in the market in 2000 and the rest of the market started to crmble after that. Bush didn't even get to implement his economic policies until a few months after he was sworn in. Your pal is looking at the dregs of a Clinton economy.
To: Rash32
Wow! He has us pegged to the 'inth degree. I can't tell you how many nights I have lain (laid?) (Lay?) whatever, awake, trying to figure out how we could give the rich more money. Alright, don't laugh. That is exactly what the rich need. And, it is enough justification for electing a Republican President. Just what is the big deal with your cousin?
9
posted on
12/09/2001 5:52:41 PM PST
by
billhilly
To: AlGone2001
The letter was actually an Email he said, "Here is your Christmas card and my annual dissertation. I didn't want to risk sending anyone anthrax. This can be printed on high quality paper if you want a hard copy."
10
posted on
12/09/2001 5:53:06 PM PST
by
Rash32
To: Rash32
"Never try to teach a pig to sing. It wastes your time and annoys the pig" --- Mark Twain
11
posted on
12/09/2001 5:54:24 PM PST
by
trek
To: dep
Tell your cuz, that despite all the hardships that were put upon you by the previous administration, that you are doing better spiritually, that you have confidence that there will be a tomorrow and that you invested in honor rather than Clinton's economy. You can mention the wild party you had with your $600 check because you didn't go into debt or rely on government doles. Tell him, that there is a Santa Claus who will bring you everything you asked for and that since you are no longer pc, he can rot in hell before you share your good fortune in having a president you can trust. Tell him that if he says the Lord's Prayer and Pledge of Allegiance you might serve him a piece of your humble pie.
12
posted on
12/09/2001 5:55:09 PM PST
by
Jaidyn
To: Rash32
Your cousin is a complete idiot. Cut all ties.
13
posted on
12/09/2001 5:55:28 PM PST
by
ilgipper
To: Rash32
I have a cousin exactly like this. Thank the good Lord that I only see her on Thanksgiving and Christmas. I avoid all political discussions and if she starts up with her stupid crap, I take my plate and go to another room to eat with someone more pleasant. Last year at Thanksgiving with the election such a mess was the worst. I simply took my plate and joined my 80 year old grandmother, my husband, my two teenagers and my Dad in the den and had a lovely time.
14
posted on
12/09/2001 5:55:48 PM PST
by
starbaby
To: Rash32
If your liberal cousin is like my liberal cousin, he's too dumb to have written this himself. It's labored and too cute by half. He lifted this from somewhere, maybe a liberal website, and is passing it off as his own creation.
Send him a game of Clue for Christmas. Gift-wrapped in re-cycled Charmin.
Leni
To: billhilly
I think he is a closet socialist.....the only positive is he lives in Colorado and I live in Pennsylvania so I do not see him at may family functions (most of the family is in the east).
16
posted on
12/09/2001 5:57:15 PM PST
by
Rash32
To: Rash32
I'd mark any future mail from him 'REFUSED' and hand it unopened to the clerk at the Post Office.
If I had to endure being in the same room at a family gathering, I'd cold shoulder him. If he spoke to me I'd reply, in a level tone, that I'd come to the conclusion that his politics were those of someone too disloyal to associate with, on any level, and that I didn't care to be bothered by him in the future.
I would, without hesitation, utterly cut off a relative who crossed the line into liberalism...
And, coming from me, this is significant. In most other respects, I honor blood ties above others to a degree that many would probably find extreme.
17
posted on
12/09/2001 5:57:42 PM PST
by
DWSUWF
To: Rash32
You want a snappy comeback? Thank him for living in Colorado, without whose electoral votes G.W. would not be President today.
To: Rash32
You can send him the letter that my father's wife always sends me about how rich and famous they are and how I am not. That will get them. I bet their yacht is bigger than his.
To: MinuteGal
I love it!!! Clue and the Chramin!!!
20
posted on
12/09/2001 5:59:51 PM PST
by
Rash32
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