Autism and the Church

Speaking4Sam ^

[Alex Murphy]

If our response to any need is, "We have a right not to be bothered by you," instead of, "What can we do for you?" then we as a congregation have failed in our mission. Any church is going to fail sometimes - a person will be faced on the wrong day with a situation he thinks is too much. However, those should be exceptions to a general pattern of sincere love and sacrificial hospitality.

I like your thinking on this. Thank you for sharing it!

[timestax]

Any church can pipe in audio and visual of church services into an "overflow" room. That, and reserve seats in the back of church for children and mothers so they can leave the room quickly if needed.

[Alex Murphy]

Any church can pipe in audio and visual of church services into an "overflow" room. That, and reserve seats in the back of church for children and mothers so they can leave the room quickly if needed.

Why not put the people who demand their "right not to be bothered" in the overflow room, and leave the sanctuary to the noisier ones?

[Tax-chick]

Any church can pipe in audio and visual of church services into an "overflow" room.

Maybe they can, and maybe they can't. Maybe the church doesn't have an "overflow room." Maybe they don't have the resources for audiovisual technology. I've been to churches where they only place to take your crying baby was outdoors, and the only place to change his diaper was on the ground.

People choose which church to attend for many different reasons. I think a loving and helpful attitude is the most important thing, even if an individual congregation turns out not to be the right fit for specific people.

[Tax-chick]

Thank you. My feeling is that if people respond to (fill in the blank) need with, “I have a right not to be bothered,” they’ll do the same if I need anything.

[informavoracious]

Somehow, when I went to church as a kid, children were well behaved and people with crying babies sat in the rear and stepped away when it got too loud. Kids in classrooms were well behaved too. What happened?

What about movie theaters and libraries and expensive restaurants? Should uncontrollable children have the run of them too? I stopped going to my local church because clueless parents would allow their kids to climb all over the pews, throwing Cheerios and squabbling. I found a nice, quiet Latin Mass where parents teach their kids they are in a special, holy place. If you prefer the raucous megachurch style, have at it. To each his own.

[Alex Murphy]

Somehow, when I went to church as a kid, children were well behaved and people with crying babies sat in the rear and stepped away when it got too loud...What happened?

Presumably, you matured and your senses became more attuned to the world around you. Either that, or things have started to grate on your nerves.

[PastorBooks]

Thank you for the pings!!!

[informavoracious]

Nope, I remember being told to sit still and doing so, as did siblings and other families’ kids.

[informavoracious]

And you did not answer the question about whether the disruptive person is getting anything out of it. If they’re having a meltdown, maybe they don’t want to be there?

[Alex Murphy]

...you did not answer the question about whether the disruptive person is getting anything out of it.

You've twice spoken of people going to church to "get" something, something that another person is denying them access to via disruptive behavior. Is that why people should go? To hear a sermon? To take communion?

[Gamecock]

To hear the absolution of sin?

[TRY ONE]

Good one! That’s what happens when one responds before coffee!

[informavoracious]

Everyone goes for his own reasons. I see no reason to torment someone who does not want to be there.

[yldstrk]

Come to the Catholic Church, we like live people of all kinds. Life is what it is all about, not fitting in to some country club kind of cool

[yldstrk]

That is not nice

[yldstrk]

Good post

[Alex Murphy]

That is not nice

FWIW Arthur's a Catholic priest, and while it's true that he and I disagree often (incl. over his position taken on this thread), he has my respect.

[Arthur McGowan]

The tone of the article got my goat. It seemed like an ever-growing set of demands. Where are all these special instructors and minders and mentors and facilitators supposed to come from? Oh, yeah. From the limitless funds and time and people and resources of the church.

The fact is that there are some places and events and activities that are not for absolutely everyone. Some children cannot and should not attend church because they cannot control their crying or screaming. They can be brought to church when they are older and have learned enough self-control. The very fact that a child—autistic or not—cries and screams in church is a clear sign that he does not know where he is or what is going on around him.

[Alex Murphy]

The tone of the article got my goat. It seemed like an ever-growing set of demands. Where are all these special instructors and minders and mentors and facilitators supposed to come from? Oh, yeah. From the limitless funds and time and people and resources of the church.

The fact is that there are some places and events and activities that are not for absolutely everyone. Some children cannot and should not attend church because they cannot control their crying or screaming. They can be brought to church when they are older and have learned enough self-control. The very fact that a child—autistic or not—cries and screams in church is a clear sign that he does not know where he is or what is going on around him.

FWIW, I believe you have substantially misread this article. There's another one that I intend to post, possibly tomorrow, which may give you some new insight into those cries and screams. "Fixed" touched on it earlier on this thread, but the article I found expands on the idea. I hope that you will take the time to read the upcoming thread when it is posted.