Posted on 10/24/2013 5:45:52 PM PDT by markomalley
Geneva, Switzerland–New guidelines set down by the international community during the fifth Geneva Convention this week has extensively defined the basic, spiritual wartime rights of the Church Militant by outlawing all Marty Haugen music used in and around war-zones. What is officially being called The Geneva Convention relative to the Protection of Parishioners in Times of Spiritual War has become the fifth convention establishing the standards on international law for the humanitarian treatment of spiritual war.
“Our new resolution states that all Catholics who are in the process of spiritual warfare are to be treated humanely,” Said General of the Counsel Robert Durant at a press conference earlier this morning.
“The following acts are to be henceforth prohibited:
(in this case) sadly.
Playing along with it...
I note that they omitted the sacrilege of David Haas. The treaty must be re-negotiated prior to ratification!
This will change the entire calculus of the Really Bad Liturgical Music Category of the Grammy Awards. Weston Priory is now the odds-on favorite.
I had never heard of Marty Haugen before, so I checked out a youtube video. His music is okay... much the same way I find Thomas Kinkade paintings are okay. Not exciting, just okay. This satire had me thinking that Haugen would turn out to be a rapper or something.
When you find a Marty Haugen piece you like, it’s probably based on a traditional hymn. I remember some songs very fondly, just because of when they appeared in my spiritual life.
Marty Haugan was the music director at my church when I was a kid in Bloomington, MN. He did our music lessons for our all day CCD classes. He was a Lutheran back then (mid-70s). He was writing original music for our church (St. Boneventure) even then. Sort of a quiet guy
Delores Dufner is right up there.
And I forgot Dan Schutte.
The trifecta - Haugen, Schutte, and Dufner.
My parish is infested with this hideous music.
We have a wonderful, spirit-filled, holy people with the worst taste in music possible.
What about Slim Whitman.
Hooray! One down — more to go!
Oops, I didn’t see the satire!
Go Slim, Go.
Marty Haugen is to hymnody as Rod McKuen is to poetry.
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