Lawyer Fined for Spanking Client (Malpractice Insurance Does Not Cover Spanking)

AP via The Carolina Channel ^ | July 16, 2002 | Associated Press

[wimpycat]

HARTFORD, Conn. -- It's a case of protecting your assets. A judge has ruled that spanking isn't covered under a lawyer's malpractice insurance policy.

A woman sued former Ansonia, Conn., attorney Milo Altschuler claiming he spanked her. The woman, who was 22 at the time, says Altschuler removed her panties, took her across his knee, and repeatedly slapped her bottom.

The spanking was supposedly to prepare her for court testimony. She later sued Altschuler, who agreed to a $250,000 settlement. But the lawyer's insurance company refused to pay, saying the conduct was criminal, not malpractice.

Now, a federal judge agrees. He ruled the insurance company won't have to pick up the lawyer's spanking tab.

[wimpycat]

I would have loved to have heard the attorney's explanation for his conduct, in his own words.

[wimpycat]

I'm still trying to think of something clever to say about this, which is a shame because this story has so many possibilities.

[Ingtar]

"Put some ice on it?"

[basil]

What kind of 22 year old woman allows something like this to happen? There's more to this story........

[TADSLOS]

The spanking was supposedly to prepare her for court testimony

I'm betting that wasn't the only thing he was preparing her for.

[wimpycat]

Of course there is...What knuckleheaded attorney would give a grown woman a bare-butted spanking to "prepare her for testimony" if there wasn't more to the story?

[mikeb704]

Surprised the shyster hasn't been elevated to a judgeship yet.

Michael M. Bates: My Side of the Swamp

[TADSLOS]

This guy watched too many Ally McBeal episodes.

[ken5050]

The lawyer was trying to figure out the size of his "deductible"

[wimpycat]

And as if he didn't already have cojones the size of Volkswagens, he sues his insurance company to force it to pay for his settlement!

[Gumlegs]

The difference being, hooker will do this for less and always stops screwing you when the hour is up.

[Freemyland]

"The spanking was supposedly to prepare her for court testimony."

And it was only when, after being sworn in at trial, she dropped her drawers and bent over the witness stand that she realized her attorney had not been entirely forthright.

[ez2muz]

"...Altschuler, who agreed to a $250,000 settlement...."

I guess he settled instead of pursuing the, "Look how she was dressed - she deserved it!" defense.

[Drango]

Altschuler removed her panties, took her across his knee, and repeatedly slapped her bottom.

Now I regret not going to law school.

[Freemyland]

This was to prepare her for her court testimony. Imagine what he would to to her to prepare her for his bill.

[Area51]

This was to prepare her for her court testimony. Imagine what he would to to her to prepare her for his bill.

15 posted on 7/16/02 10:28 AM Pacific by Freemyland

I bet he was gonna enjoy sticking it to her...

[Bubba_Leroy]

From another article about the same case:

The lawyer then claimed he had no assets and the former client tried to collect from New York-based American Home Insurance Co., with whom the lawyer had a malpractice policy.

American Home refused to pay, persuading the judge the woman had not alleged the lawyer breached his duty to properly prepare her for trial but, rather, sought to recover claims for an assault that was not covered by the malpractice policy.

"The profession of the practice of law is hardly revered," American Home argued. "Sexual assault cannot be brought under the canopy of professional services. The perverted act of intentionally fondling the bare bottoms of female clients cannot and is not part of the practice of law."

Do you think Clinton would have fought to keep his bar license if he had known?

[buffyt]

This is about the craziest thing I have read all day!!!! Just when I THOUGHT I had heard everything!!!!!

[buffyt]

Clinton is loving THIS story! For sure!

[APBaer]

"The spanking was supposedly to prepare her for court testimony. "

And it surely did!

[Ken H]

I say this lawyer will now reform.

Before you can turn your life around, you have to hit bottom first.

[archy]

Surprised the shyster hasn't been elevated to a judgeship yet.

Perhaps a clue might be found should it be noticed that instead of a gavel, the judge uses a ping-pong paddle to get the attention of those in his court.

[ofMagog]

Dang attorneys!
Stealing our ideas again!

[Constitution Day]

To: one_particular_harbour; Constitution Day

I'm still trying to think of something clever to say about this, which is a shame because this story has so many possibilities.

2 posted on 7/16/02 10:04 AM Pacific by wimpycat

Max, you have started something.
People think I'm interested in spanking threads today for some reason!

[Physicist]

She later sued Altschuler

"Oldschooler", how appropriate!

[maxwell]

LOL! Dude, I didn't ping you to this damn thread. I don't think I did. You came here of yer own perverted volition, dude. Bwahahaaaaaaaaaa.

[wimpycat]

It was me, not him! Now, bend over! You deserve a spanking for making that mistake. You don't have to drop your drawers, though.

[wimpycat]

And it was only when, after being sworn in at trial, she dropped her drawers and bent over the witness stand that she realized her attorney had not been entirely forthright.

ROFLMAO!

The difference being, hooker will do this for less and always stops screwing you when the hour is up.

ROFLMAO even more!

I was going to say 'even harder', but that wouldn't have been...well, not quite appropriate under the circumstances

[Constitution Day]

I know you didn't ping me, max!
It was wimpycat. And I was the second person she thought of.

I'm touched! (I think)

[Gumlegs]

Thanks. But I hasten to add that with a premise this great, it's pretty easy.

[Freemyland]

True. The jokes do practically write themselves.

[Gumlegs]

I must compliment you on your line, however. It had a style evocative of a Gary Larson cartoon. I could picture the fattish lady in the pixie glasses leaning over.

[stainlessbanner]

It's a case of protecting your assets

Great opening line to the article....

[wimpycat]

That was so punny!

[Constitution Day]

ROFL. I missed that.

[Freemyland]

Thanks, and a Far Side bump.

[mountaineer]

Back in my lawyer days, I had a few clients I wanted to smack up side their heads, but never on their fannies. Ewwwww.

[dixie sass]

I agree. Glad to see you back on board! Feeling much better huh? Take care of yourself Basil, we luv ya!

[dixie sass]

lol, Love that site! Had to stop reading - 'cause my sides hurt from laughing.

[Britton J Wingfield]

the term 'cramming for the bar' needs to be in there somewhere.

[mikeb704]

Ah, shucks. Thankee.

[dixie sass]

Quit blushing and you're welcome!

[sheik yerbouty]

Did it get to the bottom of the case?