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Obsolete Man Skills You Should Ditch
askmen ^ | January 11, 2019 | Ian Stobber

Posted on 05/25/2019 3:43:57 PM PDT by Mount Athos

1. Hunting Hunting was a hugely important skill for much of human history, but in light of the rise of cheap and readily available factory-farmed meat, hunting’s relationship to the food we actually eat has disappeared for the overwhelming majority of the population. If you grew up in a rural area, there’s a good chance you learned to shoot game at some point, but as much as many contemporary guys fantasize about being able to kill a wild animal and eat it (Mark Zuckerberg, anyone?), particularly if you live in a big city, there’s really not much real-world benefit to that glorification.

Instead, Learn How to Cook for Yourself

Meanwhile, the average millennial man is probably more adept at ordering dinner online than actually making it, which is too bad. Cooking your own meals is a lot of fun, generally cheaper than eating out or ordering in, and typically healthier, too. It’s also something that, while it may seem impossible to a beginner, is actually not as complicated as it seems. Join a cooking class — or even watch some YouTube how-tos or try a meal kit delivery service — and you might be surprised at how handy you become in the kitchen. And yes, it will impress people.

2. Fighting It’s a pretty common conception that at the root of every male confrontation is the possibility of physical violence. Road rage incidents, bar standoffs, most guys have found themselves in a situation that felt like a prelude to fisticuffs. And in a violent dog-eat-dog world, there’s a certain logic to that approach. But how many of those situations actually evolve into a fight? And why should any of them? Physical fighting literally doesn’t solve anything — it just leaves people angry and bruised, or worse.

Instead, Learn How to Mediate

Problem-solving with an eye to compromise and healthy conflict resolution is something that, by and large, men just aren’t taught growing up. That’s one of the reasons many of us are so quick to start swinging or shoving rather than handling things with our words. But if we start thinking that the real loss isn’t losing (or walking away from) a fight, but rather getting into one in the first place, what would we really lose?

The old-world caveman mentality of brute force’s dominance is dying out. If you’re someone who can work through a confrontation without needing to beat the other person into submission — physically, verbally or emotionally — you’ll see it pay off in your close personal relationships, too. Next time things start getting heated, try recognizing that you're angry and trying to engage the other person with your words (or just walking away).

3. Repairing Your Car In the popular imagination, the greasy car mechanic wiping his sweaty brow as he peers into your car hood is always a guy. Concordantly, the idea that a car is a guy thing and a guy should be able to fix his car as a result is something that’s pretty ingrained in our cultural beliefs. But as cars shift from analog behemoths to digital devices, some of the basic functionality in your car is now completely out of the fixing range of even the handiest of men. Not to mention that increasingly, electric cars, public transit, and cycling are becoming more attractive options for environmental reasons, and ride-sharing or car-sharing services mean the link between being in a car and being responsible for its functioning is as tenuous as it’s ever been.

Instead, Learn How to Code

The 20th century mythos of the car as a vehicle that gave you freedom — to cross great distances, to discover new things, to leave your past behind — is perhaps now more accurately applied to the internet. There’s a pretty good chance you spend more time online these days than driving (ideally not at the same time, though), but the average person probably has little idea how any of the internet actually functions, let alone how to build a website or make an app.

Considering the way the economy is increasingly shifting toward the digital, having at least a solid grounding in what makes the internet tick is a good idea generally. There are a lot of free or cheap how-to courses designed to help you learn how to code these days. Give one a try and see if it doesn’t come more in handy than learning to replace the alternator.

4. Fixing Things at Home Power tools are such a de facto man thing that you’d be hard-pressed to find examples of women using them in most movies or TV shows. Men just are the mechanics of the world, right? As with car maintenance, however, the idea that a man owns his house and should therefore know how to take care of it is increasingly an outdated concept. With most millennials having no real shot at home-ownership, there’s a good chance your landlord will be the one in charge of fixing anything that goes wrong in your place — or, more likely, paying someone else to.

Instead, Learn How to Decorate

It’s a sort of running gag in contemporary culture that women put a lot of effort into decorating their homes and filling them with the basic household necessities while men, well, sleep on a mattress lying on the floor. While it’s not as cut-and-dried as that, the average guy probably has some catching up to do with regards to interior design. It’s not something that women are innately better at, after all; it’s something that you can make serious strides in by committing yourself to. If you have the time and/or the money, investing in how your space looks, feels, and functions can really change how you feel about the space (and how any potential dates you bring home feel about it).

5. Being a Leader For much of human history, patriarchal societies meant women were expected to stay home and raise children, and men were expected to run everything else. Meaning, while there’s a good chance your mom wasn’t a CEO, your grandmother almost certainly wasn’t.

But in today’s world, the notion that a man will or must be a leader is increasingly vanishing. What that means is that guys who were brought up expecting to be in control are now having to accept that — gasp! — their boss is a woman. What to do?!

Instead, Learn How to Collaborate

Workplaces of the future are likely to be less reliant on men’s top-down leadership and more dependent on open communication between coworkers of all genders and utilizes a lot of different peoples’ skill sets. Rather than a bunch of guys all competing to nail down a corner office, a healthy workplace is one where ego takes a backseat to communal success.

Unrestrained ambition and a need to be in control all the time will hurt your chances at a promotion, not help them. So instead, try to focus on building soft skills such as supporting co-workers, building links between different divisions, and knowing how and when to compromise.

6. Being a Disciplinarian For a long time, the most important aspect of being a father was simply providing for your family, and second, perhaps, was molding your sons into men. That meant being stern with them — even harsh. That meant toughening them up by teaching them how to shoot, how to fight, how to push through their pain, how to overcome their fears. All the old Man Skills, basically.

The archetypal disciplinary father really wasn’t setting his sons up to have emotionally healthy lives, though, meaning possible repressed trauma, difficulty communicating about feelings, and a dire need to see a therapist are far more common than you’d hope for adult men.

Instead, Learn How to Communicate With Your Children

If you really want to have a positive impact on their lives, it’s vital that you prioritize being there for them and encouraging them to be open with you about what they think and how they feel, rather than pushing them to fit into a narrow model of how to be. Don’t be the father who punishes his son for exploring more feminine things — he’ll resent you. Instead, be the father who encourages his kids to pursue their own interests and to become their own people, and who’s there to listen when something’s gone wrong.

RELATED: How to Be a Better Father, Explained

7. Holding Your Emotions In For a long time, the model man was stoic: the strong, silent type who never cried and wouldn’t admit when something made him sad or afraid. Let’s leave that whole concept in the past where it belongs.

Aside from just valuing communication, kindness, and empathy, this is a life-and-death issue. Men’s inability to open up can cause them to struggle with forming friendships and meaningful bonds with other people, which scientists have linked to early male mortality rates. That’s right: Being emotionally walled up is literally killing men.

Instead, Learn How to Talk About Your Feelings

As a man, there might not be any single more important skill you can pursue than emotional maturity. Understanding what you’re feeling, why you’re feeling it, and how to handle that feeling is something that few men are taught growing up, and it’s hard to overstate the negative impacts the absence of that skill can pose. If you have the means to, consider going into therapy. Even if you don’t feel that you’re struggling and haven’t been diagnosed with any mental health issues, therapy is a proven effective way to work through problems that have been plaguing you and become a happier, healthier version of yourself.

TOPICS: Culture/Society; News/Current Events
KEYWORDS: culture; feminazism; gelding; men; metrosexuals; savethemales; skills; smashthepatriarchy; takeawayhispower
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To: Mount Athos

What a bunch of Obama that article is!

81 posted on 05/25/2019 4:21:50 PM PDT by KevinB (Joseph McCarthy was right!)
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To: Mount Athos

This guy wouldn’t last 5 minutes when the lights go out.

Learn to code? Really.

82 posted on 05/25/2019 4:21:58 PM PDT by DeplorablePaul (s)
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To: Mount Athos

So, uh, should I learn some mad skills regarding the putting on of mascara and eye shadow?

83 posted on 05/25/2019 4:22:58 PM PDT by Pilgrim's Progress ( D)
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To: Covenantor

Red. With a mildly psychotic personality. That won’t do ironing.

84 posted on 05/25/2019 4:23:04 PM PDT by polymuser (It is terrible to contemplate how few politicians are hanged today. - Chesterton)
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To: KarlInOhio

There was an article a few years ago that said women say they want the wimpy metrosexual feminist males, but then are forced by nature to respond to ancient impulses when they hear a man’s deep voice, see that he has muscles (to protect babies and mothers someday) and that his boldness and refusal to change to do what she wants shows he has testosterone.

Thus, the woman is attracted to this man despite saying she wants the wimpy guy she met at the garden walk or the museum. So Tim McGraw and Clint Eastwood types are chosen more often.

And still complains that “men are jerks” and two women shake their heads and say “that’s a guy thing.”

85 posted on 05/25/2019 4:23:05 PM PDT by frank ballenger (End vote fraud,non-citizen voting & leftist media news censorship or we're finishid.)
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To: Mount Athos

Be a beta cuck ... that way when ... not if ... the US is attacked there will be no men to defend it

86 posted on 05/25/2019 4:23:15 PM PDT by clamper1797 (We are getting close to the last "box")
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To: Mount Athos
I got estrogen poisoning from reading this little piece of dreck. Believe it or not, much of the male (or more or less male) population of the country doesn't live in an urban area where his needs are catered to by someone of the lower classes, and regrettably we find certain atavistic skills to be downright useful. Going from a handyman to an interior decorator doesn't get the barn rewired.

That is not to say a certain civility isn't in order. The gentleman will read this sort of thing, nod sadly, smile, and wait until the author is no longer in sight to crumple it and use it as kindling for the wood stove. And there is a certain crossover to be cultivated as well: negotiating skills, for example, especially when they're enhanced by pressing the muzzle of a .357 magnum into the other fellow's forehead. There's plenty of room for nice so long as nasty remains in reach. Welcome to manhood.

87 posted on 05/25/2019 4:23:41 PM PDT by Billthedrill
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To: Mount Athos

If this isn’t a joke, permit me to GUARANTEE this is 100% targeted at ONLY white guys.

There’s NO WAY they would perscribe such a Suicidal Life Formula to ANYONE else.

I’m surprised they didn’t recommend doing away with being able to tell a good joke, make witty banter.

I’ll bet I should stop thinking about sex, too, right..?

88 posted on 05/25/2019 4:24:25 PM PDT by gaijin
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To: Mount Athos

Reading this may make you retarded and gay and could result in catching an STD...

89 posted on 05/25/2019 4:25:51 PM PDT by northislander
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To: Mount Athos
Instead, Learn How to Code

And immediately banned from Twitter.

90 posted on 05/25/2019 4:26:08 PM PDT by Future Snake Eater (Plans are worthless, but planning is everything. - Dwight Eisenhower, 1957)
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To: Mount Athos
...the idea that a man owns his house and should therefore know how to take care of it is increasingly an outdated concept. With most millennials having no real shot at home-ownership, there’s a good chance your landlord will be the one in charge of fixing anything that goes wrong in your place...

Homeownership rate rises to four-year high as Millennials are finally buying homes


91 posted on 05/25/2019 4:29:00 PM PDT by Future Snake Eater (Plans are worthless, but planning is everything. - Dwight Eisenhower, 1957)
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To: Mount Athos

Is this for real?

I mean, is this person serious????????

This is not satire?

92 posted on 05/25/2019 4:29:10 PM PDT by metmom ( ...fixing our eyes on Jesus, the Author and Perfecter of our faith...)
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To: Mount Athos

You know, I’m a millenial and I can hunt AND cook. I can fix a car, and household items, and I own my own home. He seems to assume that everyone is as much of a wimp as he is. Besides that, with all of these things, it’s always better to know than not.

93 posted on 05/25/2019 4:29:42 PM PDT by ferret_airlift
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Ian Stobber
Ian Stobber is a Canadian writer with a passion for dating and a witty turn of phrase. To be honest, he’s everything that’s wrong with millennials, but he also appreciates the classics: He loves bourbon, hockey, and long walks on the rocky shores of a frozen lake.

94 posted on 05/25/2019 4:30:03 PM PDT by Rio
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To: Freedom4US

35 posts! He should have done an article on fellatio!

95 posted on 05/25/2019 4:30:45 PM PDT by outofsalt (ALL MY CHIPS BELONG TO BITT!!!)
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To: RedMonqey
That's what I was thinking - nothing but a screed against alpha males. Guess what, we need alpha males. Not everything in the world can be solved with a therapist and a latte. Sometimes you've got to get your hands dirty - with dirt, grease, or blood. Somebody has to know which end of a screwdriver, or an AR-15, to pick up. That bacon ain't going to eat itself, nor will that whiskey drink itself...

Hunting? It's a good thing I live in the times I do, because I suck at it. I do know how to cook reasonably well. I'd never win a cooking competition, but I can hold my own at the neighborhood or work picnic.

Fighting? I'd rather not, but if you push me, you'll regret it - more than one person has learned that lesson the hard way. As I've mentioned before, I've never started a fight, but I've never lost one either.

Fixing things? You better believe it. My Dad could too. Wire a 220 circuit? No problem. Swap an engine head in the garage? Got it. Replace a broken garbage disposal? Before lunch. Build fixtures to help assemble a kit aircraft? Sure... These kinds of skills can not only give you a great sense of satisfaction, they can save you a pile of money.

And on and on. I basically disagree with everything the original author said.

96 posted on 05/25/2019 4:32:12 PM PDT by ThunderSleeps ( Be ready!)
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To: Mount Athos
Instead, Learn How to Decorate

So, learn to be a homo?

97 posted on 05/25/2019 4:32:28 PM PDT by doorgunner69
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then who is going to fix things?

According to the author, your landlord. But if that is a man, then how does he know how to fix things?...
He can HIRE someone to fix it... But if he hires a man, how will HE know how to fix it.

I guess you just toss it out and buy another one.

98 posted on 05/25/2019 4:34:57 PM PDT by Rio
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To: MayflowerMadam

Its articles like this that convinces me that the competitors are thinning out. Let the rest of the nation be filled with beta males. Ill keep all the gals for myself.

99 posted on 05/25/2019 4:37:35 PM PDT by vannrox (The Preamble to the Bill of Rights - without it, our Bill of Rights is meaningless!)
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To: Mount Athos
1. Hunting is still important if SHTF.
Knowing how to cook what you kill goes with it.
Fresh and preserved meat are great to bargain with.

2. Learn how to fight, then talk your opponent down instead, to avoid injury or liability.
A stronger position can help you stay calm.

3,4: Repairing Your Car or Fixing Things at home can save you tons of money if you can do it but there is no shame to seek professional help when necessary.
Old cars were easy to fix with standard tools, modern cars often require hundreds of dollars of special tools just for that brand. It's on purpose.
Not everyone are handy, screw the "all men..." trap. Do what you're good at.

5. Being a Leader - be a *competent* leader, not just the loudest in the room.

6. Keep your emotions in control, let out only enough to achieve your objective.
Uncontrolled outbursts are not respected, they are fearsome and can backfire badly.
Stay rational.
If you need to talk about your feelings, choose a time and place where it is appropriate. Not during a crisis.

My 3¢

100 posted on 05/25/2019 4:37:54 PM PDT by BitWielder1 (I'd rather have Unequal Wealth than Equal Poverty.)
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