Posted on 03/25/2016 8:50:29 PM PDT by Arthur McGowan
Have you tried chiropractic? I’ll pray for you.
I don’t approve of letting babies sleep in the parental bed but in your case it seems like it might help.
I agree which is why I wrote “knows that it calms them.” The parent cannot know this unless they have been there to sooth the child. It is the association the lovey has with the parents soothing the child that makes it possible for the child to use it to calm herself. I’m not writing about a child full out screaming but one that is just a bit fussy and has a few cranky cries to get out. I should have been clear I did not mean infants but toddler age children.
The human infant is designed to be close to and almost fully dependent upon mom for the first 3 years of life. This closeness is necessary for proper brain development and social structure. Separating infants from their mom at 6 weeks and putting them in a typical day care facility
is contradictory to this. It also means mom since mom is working she is even more exhausted and likely to turn to letting a baby cry it out. Not out of malice but out of desperation and exhaustion.
I don’t know if this will work but I think it is probably much more than just the tactile sensation that soothes her. This has become such a routine I wonder if there are actually changes to her brain chemistry in response to your holding her hands. When you remove your hands it triggers what for lack of a better term I’ll call a withdrawal. If you can help her associate another touch or stimulation of another sense with you holding her hands perhaps you can gradually substitute that for the hand holding without it triggering her desperate cries.
I am not sure if you should try swaddling or putting little mittens on her or make sure the same song is always playing as you hold her hand. The idea is to keep her serotonin levels to where she is relaxed.
Of course you should run this idea by your pediatrician and God be with you.
There may be a parental support group for parents with children who have extreme sleep difficulties. Do you live near a college or university with a medical center? Get in touch with their neurology department to ask about sleep studies for toddlers. Even if they do not have such studies they may be able to put you in touch with a specialist and parental support groups.
((((HUGS))))
I hope your adopted son is doing well, dear Mrs. Don-o.
I think about you often.
Thank you for the evidence you posted.
Have you gone to any Chinese medicine doctors? Or Ayurvedic? Many alternative ones are useless, I prefer the old traditions.
now, of my three, the one I breast fed the longest has aspergers and the one I breast feed the shortest time is probably the most well adjusted...go figure..( and her first words were cookie, chip,and cake, I swear...lol)
Once I babysat a tiny baby - maybe 4 or 5 months old - for a couple I did not know, my (at the time) friend was a regular babysitter for them, and she could not do it, so they had me for some hours. It was a freaking nightmare.
This baby had her own rook - on a separate FLOOR from the parents! She was bottle fed, and had some device to prop the bottle up. There were dangly things hanging around the crib, all black and white, with sort of Op Art spirals, chopped looking patterns, positively nerve racking, and some (to me) evil clown faces. I was instructed to let her cry. I didn’t. And I never went back there again.
I learned that the parents were both lab scientists who worked with rats, torturing them in some way, no doubt.
Remembering this incident still fills me with dread and horror. I wonder what happened to that poor, poor child.
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