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The Serenity Prayer |
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God grant me the serenity Living one day at a time; --Reinhold Niebuhr In loving memory of |
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Trust in the LORD with all your heart Proverbs 3, 5-6 |
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Posted on 07/24/2014 6:18:53 AM PDT by Vendome
Having ream trouble supporting an alcoholic Friend.
He's been in Hollywood business for years and literally screwed up his life.
He's spent most of the last twenty years in jail for his stupid behavior.
Likes to promise people a good time, dinner and drinks but, consistently leaves people hanging with the check.
If he's not doing that, then he's walking into restaurants, bars and hotels, then getting busted for defrauding an inn keeper.
There are drunks, lousy drunks and terrible drunks. Of course, he has to be a terrible drunk. Alters his mind and he gets verbally combative, aggressive or outright loses his mind and decides assault is going to be his nirvana.
Hell, he's been busted for so many stupid things I can't recall.
His life is not informed by rules that guide, rather it is a life of constant manipulation, scheming and adolescent thought that borders, no it is, lunacy.
I’ve been there done that - with a husband.
This friend is an alcoholic and that’s probably not the only serious issue he has. As long as you are “helping”, he will not change. You are simply extending his “career” as an alcoholic.
No more help until he helps himself - really helps himself - not just another manipulation, but real concrete steps.
This relationship is toxic to you. Not helping him either. Those things are really hard to accept initially. Even harder to do.
I had a friend my entire adult life who was in many ways similar to what you describe. Always manipulating, lying and cheating (I paid you that loan back). Working a regular job was beneath him so he sold securities and insurance but always referred to his clients as suckers. He was a major leftist and I finally cut ties with him almost two decades ago. He died in poverty and alone a couple of years ago.
He needs Jesus.
Seriously. He does not have the power to help himself.
And you will exhaust yourself trying to help him.
He has done this gig so long, he knows all the tricks to manipulate people.
He was given a gift and he squandered it.
He refuses to believe that.
You are a good hearted soul, one of the few people left that have not cut ties to him.
He needs to know you are out of his life unless he makes a radical change.
You cannot make a person change their life. They have to want to change their life.
And he will not change unless he has absolutely no other choice.
He needs heavenly help, with power from the Holy Spirit.
John Chapter 3 tells him the only way to get it.
Don’t be an enabler.
Take him to an AA meeting and plant the seed of recovery.
And you can attend an Al-Anon meeting — it’s just not for women.
That's exactly the problem. Keep enabling and he'll never hit bottom where the only way out is up.
Millions of people would give anything to have what he has: Access to the “Movie Stars” and writers, directors and producers. And he just tosses it in the garbage like a used Kleenex?
God bless him,he needs to go into rehab.I will pray for him.
Your friend is an alcoholic. Are you in recovery through AA? I recommend you also attend Al Anon Meetings. They will be a big help for YOUR sanity. You can’t change your friend. But you can change yourself. Prayers up for you and of your friend. You can recommend he look into AA and then let it go. He is in charge of his own life and choices.
absolutely!
Yeah I know. I’m not being manipulated. I don’t like it and I quash that stuff easy.
I’m his Mom’s best friend and she asked me to help him.
Told her before we left I thought he was getting ready to go off the rails again.
We understood the risk and agreed to let this experiment run.
If he fails, well he’ll have to accept his big boy decision but, it’s been made clear to him “ this is it. Don’t destroy our faith, because we have the ability to walk and you’ll be Flintstoning every where you walk from now on”.
Just an experiment and I’m going to have a hard talk witb them when I get home.
We just got off the phone and we’re all in agreement.
Live by your rules and we’ll accept your terms.
BINGO!
|
The Serenity Prayer |
|
|
|
God grant me the serenity Living one day at a time; --Reinhold Niebuhr In loving memory of |
|
Trust in the LORD with all your heart Proverbs 3, 5-6 |
|
|
The Serenity Prayer |
|
|
|
God grant me the serenity Living one day at a time; --Reinhold Niebuhr In loving memory of |
|
Trust in the LORD with all your heart Proverbs 3, 5-6 |
|
Roxbury Men’s Stag Wed 8:00PM Olympic Blvd.
Beverly Hills Tell him to stick his hand up and ask for help!
Delete his number out of your cell phone. Forget his name and move on. Maybe get some counseling as to why you are mixed up with this kind of person. Seriously.
If he calls, just refer him to AA.
We just decided that.
He has a meeting with his director, who knows his past. It’ll be obvious and his other partner knows his past as well.
They are concerned and this thing’ll fall apart in an hour.
Garde la Foi, mes amis! Nous nous sommes les sauveurs de la République! Maintenant et Toujours!
(Keep the Faith, my friends! We are the saviors of the Republic! Now and Forever!)
LonePalm, le Républicain du verre cassé (The Broken Glass Republican)
I know a guy exactly like that. A brilliant man, a gifted musician, but he was also his own worst enemy. Chased all his friends and relatives away with his drunken antics. Then one day he woke up in a jail cell with two black eyes, knots upside his head, and bruises all over him. And he had no idea how he got there, because he’d had a blackout. Later he learned that he had gotten into a bar fight with an undercover cop, who called his backup and proceeded to beat the crap out of my friend. They nailed him for assault on police officers, and he wound up doing eighteen months in jail. That was his “rock bottom”. He cleaned up his act in a hurry after that, and hasn’t touched a drink since he got out about a year ago. So there is still help for your friend. All it takes is one life-altering experience caused by excessive drinking.
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