Parish life has become insufferably middle-class

Catholic Herald ^ | August 3, 2017 | Matthew Walther

[Mrs. Don-o]

I don't have an opinion on this ( hear ye! Hear ye! A subject on which Mrs Don-o does not have an opinion!)

...but a friend of mine who is a solid and doctrinally-sound Catholic -- and a catechist in his solid parish--- holds the view that it's so hard to get Catholics to go to Adult Ed classes, that the only time you can "catch" them is by pressing them pretty firmly into Sacrament Prep when they or their children are up for Matrimony or First Confession/Communion or whatever. Your one,-and-only chance for Remedial Catechesis.

Thoughts?

[stylin19a]

In my family, if you waited too long to have the Baptism ( according grandma\aunts), they’d take the baby into the bathroom and do a quickie baptism.

[Patrick Henry Dichotomy]

Perish the thought

[Verginius Rufus]

My grandmother's great-grandmother was a midwife in an Eastern European village in the mid-19th-century. She was trained to baptize newborns if they were likely to die very soon (unfortunately not an uncommon occurrence). No classes for the parents and no time to summon godparents.

From an online parish record (different location, dated 1815): "Antonius...statim ac de ventre matris egressus susceptaque baptismae sacra in coelum evolavit" = "Anthony...immediately coming forth from his mother's womb and having received the sacred things of baptism flew up to heaven."

(Thanks to FamilySearch.org for making these records available online)

[Excellence]

My children got the full-blown Latin baptism.

[stylin19a]

thanks for sharing that.

It always bugged me about the parishes.

Christ is the solution. Why do they wait so long to bring us to Him ?

[ebb tide]

Years ago my future-wife and I were given the option to attend a one-time, full day, pre-cana class on a Saturday, which we opted for.

It was taught by a married lay couple. They talked about balancing a check book for the first half hour. Then, all they talked about was natural birth control; about how they used to practice artificial birth control but had now gone natural and how to do it.

After two hours of this crap, I politely told them, at a break, that my fiance and I were not interested in birth control and I asked if they would they be talking about anything else. They said, “No”. I then asked if we could then be excused. They said they would not give us pre-cana credit if we left.

We then sat through 7-1/2 more hours of natural birth control movies and lectures.

No priest or deacon ever addressed the class.

As far as baptismal classes, I can understand a one-time class for newlywed first-time parents maybe OK (but this is what should have already been taught in an orthodox pre-cana class).

But when subsequent classes are required for the baptism of subsequent children, I consider it child abuse.

The abuse being the Church is delaying the essential baptism required for the salvation of those newborns, even after seeing the couple in Church, with their older children, at Mass every Sunday.

To sum, it up: I think their both jokes.

Sorry for the rant.

[Bratch]

Are the classes pro bono?

If not, I’ve got a pretty good idea why they’re “required”.

[ebb tide]

Good for you!

So did mine.

[Dilbert San Diego]

I read this a couple of times, and I honestly have no idea what he is complaining about. Sacraments are too bourgeois and middle class?? What the heck is he saying?

[Bratch]

Perish the thought

[Not gonna take it anymore]

It’s not the sacraments, it’s all the BS that goes with it. And I agree with him.

[huckfillary]

Thank you, stylin. I have years of Baltimore Catechism under my belt. You are correct. Anyone can baptize anyone-—with tap water or anything with water. Iced tea, Diet Coke, or a Gin & Tonic will do just fine.

So bag the classes and do a home Baptism.

[ebb tide]

Although home baptisms are valid, one will have problems when it comes time for First Communion, Confirmation and Marriage.

[stylin19a]

Baltimore Catechism...yikes...learned by rote. retained very little. The filtered version of the bible.

If one commits a sin knowingly taking a living sacrament while in the state of mortal sin,
Can I administer baptism, a sacrament of the dead, while I’m in the state of mortal sin ?

[Mrs. Don-o]

No, that’s OK. That’s not a rant, that’s just an honest reaction to what sounds like a very irksome imposition on the part of the parish.

Plus, I hadn’t thought of Baptism classes happening after the baby is born, thus delaying the baptism by weeks or months. I’d thought maybe the classes were offered for expectant couples.

If somebody had insisted on delaying my newborn son’s baptism in this way, I’m pretty sure I would
have baptized him myself.

[huckfillary]

Not if you a do a home First Communion, Confirmation, and Marriage as well !!

[ebb tide]

How are you going to do a First Communion/Confirmation without a priest/bishop?

Are you a Catholic?

[Luircin]

How annoying and uncaring that is, seriously.

Baptism is the one (at least out of the two-and-a-half Sacraments for us Lutherans) Sacrament that you DON’T need instruction for. I mean, seriously, if baptismal faith is a gift from God and not an intellectual work, why?

If it was an adult convert, I’d probably want to educate someone before baptism unless they were insistent on getting it RIGHT NOW, but for a baby? There’s no reason to wait unless they’re deathly allergic to water or something!