Skip to comments.Study: 'Toxic Perfectionism' Major Part of LDS Women's Depression
Posted on 02/14/2013 3:33:33 PM PST by fattigermaster
OREM Striving for perfection may be driving some female members of the Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints to depression, one researcher says.
Utah Valley University professor Kris Doty looked at depression among LDS women, finding that "toxic perfectionism" was one major factor of depression reported by the group. The other four factors, Doty found, were genetics, history of abuse, family relationships and feeling judged by others.
Over a one-year period, Doty and her colleagues looked at clinically diagnosed depressed women who identified as LDS. Seven of the women were using multiple medications to treat their depression, 19 were on only one medication and 10 had participated in therapy. Women in the study said the church's teachings about perfection led to painful misinterpretations wherein many women believed they could not make mistakes. This belief, Doty said, caused them to "become hyper-competitive and anxious."
At a symposium on the topic Thursday, study participants said church leaders were reminding women especially mothers that they are not required to be perfect.
Perhaps the newly minted mormonic male gods can divvy up the females who are unattached among themselves?
Okay. I admit it. I thought that comment was funny. I don't spend much time thinking about all those details of the afterlife. I'm just trying to get through this one and enjoy it. :)
You and I won't agree on Mormon doctrine. And that's okay. I enjoy a good religious discussion, especially one where all parties are respectful, even when they disagree. I don't usually get involved in Mormon threads because they get pretty heated. But I appreciate your responses. They're non-judgemental and very level-headed.
“You and I won’t agree on Mormon doctrine. And that’s okay. I enjoy a good religious discussion, especially one where all parties are respectful, even when they disagree. I don’t usually get involved in Mormon threads because they get pretty heated. But I appreciate your responses. They’re non-judgemental and very level-headed.”
Back at ya.
I’ve no reason to get heated. Ultimately, I want every mormon to know the Gospel of Grace and the Love behind it. It will never be me that changes someone’s mind. It is Him alone. All I can do is be available to tell the truth and point out falsehood at times.
Kindest FReegards to you.
I washed three loads of laundry every day, and mopped my bathroom and kitchen floors every other day.
If it would not start or it was broke down she had to use a scrub board and ring the clothes out by hand, and most of the time it was broke down, she had an easy job of cleaning three bath rooms because we never had one, we had an out house.
Oh, my mother had it so easy, she never had to take excerise because she never had that much time to spare,
She got all she needed cooking, including baking every day for at times seven kids, ( some of the kids left home at an early age ) sewing patches on pants and shirts, ironing, carrying water in from the barrel or well or a quarter mile walk from the spring, cleaning dirt floors and then dampening them and repacking them.
She never had to drive us kids around because she never had no car except when dad was home but she never learned to drive any way.
Did i mention chopping the wood for the cook stove for cooking and warming the water for the bathes of the little kids too young to do it for them selves?
Milking and feeding a cow or up to twenty cows and sometimes feeding pigs,( not us kids but other pigs,) feeding and caring for chickens, and on top of that raising a big garden, working in other peoples fields right along beside us kids hoeing weeds for 15 to 25 cents an hour.
And the times we lived in town she took up washings and ironing’s at home with the same old wore out washers and the same old clothes lines which we took with us when we moved, and the same irons that you had to put on a stove to heat, plus all of the other work she would normally do.
Thank God we never had no band practice or other school socialist programs that she would have had to walk from several blocks to several miles to attend.
My mother was not a Mormon, during these years the Mormon women also worked hard but were living
much better in comparison.
Sorry you had it so rough.
I’m glad your mother did not also have to work full time.
Sorry she had it so rough - I understand. I never had a washing machine until #3 was born, and I used cloth diapers. I’ve got a wringer washer and I considered THAT a luxury. I hope your mother knew and experience the grace that God offered her, so that when she failed she knew that she was still loved.
What a hateful remark. So typical, too.
Thanks for sharing your experiences in a way I could never do.
I am happy for your peace of mind in Christ now. Ain’t grace wonderful?!!
May each mormon reading this thread come to know the Gospel of Grace and the God of Love Who made it possible. May they leave the false gospel of works and turn to the true God.
Amazing isn’t it. Don’t you just feel the love?
What a hateful remark.
In other words it was not just the Mormon women who had to work hard, every one did it not many years before.
But the self righeous hatred of another religion that most likely is just as false will do any thing they can to make these Mormon women feel inferior and mistreated and mostly it is just a big lie that liberals are good at.
Im glad your mother did not also have to work full time.
——————————————————————————————Thanks for the reply and i did not mean to put your work down, but the reason i put it the way i did is because it makes me so dam mad that any person or religious group will do or say any thing to make the Mormon Women feel inferior, and i know for a fact they are not inferior.
If they want to bring up false religion why don,t they just read the Bible to them? but if they would actually read the Bible they may find a few things that differs from their point of view, especially about work, and they also may find some false doctrine in their own Church.
If i was going to write an article as the author did i think i would at least leave the Church first.
And i am certainly not a Mormon.
Sorry for the words i chose in my first comment to you, it takes some one pretty great to do all you did.
Another "I'm not a mormon but.." weighing in with a Christian-bashing comment in defense of the sexist mormon doctrine and practice.
Those of us women who lived under the so-called "priesthood" tyrany of mormonism call FOUL on your rants.
Finally, you understand some of momronism's teachings.
In the lds culture, the woman ARE being judged. (They must appear to be perfect.) It is not a perception, it is a reality.
Well, #1, I won't try to pretend I know how every Mormon applies grace vs. merit to their lives...but we can take a look at Book of Mormon passages and make a few surface conclusions:
Q. According to the Book of Mormon, who initiates grace -- man or God?
A. Per the BoM, Man does
Q. Where is that found?
A. Helaman 12:24 and 2 Nephi 25:23
And may God grant, in his great fulness, that men might be brought unto repentance and good works, that they might be restored unto grace for grace, ACCORDING TO THEIR WORKS. (Hel. 12:24)
If grace is "merited" "according to...works" -- then, sorry, "grace" is no longer "free." It's been turned on its head & 100% redefined. (Just try teaching your kids to merit their birthday & Christmas "gifts" "according to their works.")
...for we know that it is by grace that we are saved, AFTER ALL WE CAN DO. (2 Nephi 25:23)
And here, grace only kicks in like some afterburner on a rocket after you've used all your own fuel to get to a certain location. Tell us, what Mormon would actually have the gall to say to God, "Lord, I've done EVERYTHING I could possibly do. Spiritually. Physically. Emotionally. Mentally. Relationally. Etc. I've 'initiated' it, Lord, for your grace" ???
So...it's no wonder both Mormon women -- as well as Mormon men -- put all of this misguided religious perfectionism as a big burden on their shoulders!
Secondly, Lds HEAVILY stress the word "worthy" ... as if they constantly need to find a way to become "worthy" in God's sight.
Worthiness is actually related to the word, "worship." And Jesus -- ALONE among men -- is "worth-ship" - able ... meaning He is the ONLY ONE found "worthy"...not only to be worshiped...but the ONLY ONE Heavenly Father finds worthy...At least in terms with living with Him -- all-holy -- forever!
God in His holy Word didn't say 'twas the obedience of the many that was the center point of the Gospel [that's the Mormon version & many other cults]...Here's what He said in contrast:
19 For just as through the disobedience of the one man the many were made sinners, so also through the obedience of the one man the many will be made righteous. (Romans 5:19)
Jesus' perfect obedience is what the standard of the Law called for...NONE of us could match up...Therefore, we need His righteousness imputed -- given -- to us (1 Cor. 1:30). Jesus ALONE is worthy -- and that worthiness is based upon Him as the Lamb of God being slain (see Rev. 5:9 in my previous post).
Now...how else is this distorted by the Lds concept of worthiness and sweat labor?
Q According to Mormon writings, what makes you "worthy?"
A Your perfection (3 Nephi 12:48; Mt. 5:48)
[Whereas, in contrast, a good definition of a "Christian" is someone already perfect in the Father's eyes thru Jesus sacrificial death (Heb. 10:14) -- where His perfect righteousness is substituted for our imperfect righteousness. (1 Cor. 1:30). Heb. 10:14: ...because by one sacrifice he has made perfect forever those who are being made holy.]
We are perfect due to Christ's sacrifice, says Heb. 10:14.
Just to be sure I was representing the Mormon position, I looked up this key Lds concept of "worthiness" in the 1977 "Topical Guide to the Scriptures of the Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints" published by church-owned Deseret Publishers.
I found verses like Doctrine & Covenants 59:4: "And they shall also be crowned with blessings from above, yea, and with commandments not a few, and with revelations in their time--they that are faithful and diligent before me."
"Commandments not a few"? -- sounds like a long checklist to me.
I then looked at the 1979 "Topical Guide" in the Lds version of its KJV -- and turned to the "worthiness" entry there: It tells me right up top its related to the concept of "qualifying for" & then proceeds to verses like D&C 31:5: "Therefore, thrust in your sickle with all your soul, and your sins are forgiven you, and you shall be laden with sheaves upon your back, for the laborer is worthy of his hire. Wherefore, your family shall live."
Ah. There it is: The Mormon "strategy." Don't "trust" another's blood-death sacrifice for your salvation; no..."thrust in your sickle"
So it sounds like the Mormon god wants plenty of soul labor
-- paid labor
-- garden sweat
-- spiritual hirelings
-- earned labor
No free gifts here.
No grace here.
Just follow the rules, ma'am.
Indeed, the LDS are the "rules oriented" ones: The purity and perfection we seek is unattainable without this subjection of unworthy, ungodlike urges and the corresponding encouragement of their opposites. We certainly cannot expect the rules to be easier for us than for the Son of God... (Lds 13th "prophet" Spencer W. Kimball, The Miracle of Forgiveness, p. 28)
Just look @ all the "rule extensions" Lds have imposed upon their followers in order to live forever with Heavenly father:
(1) You have to be obedient to all the commandments & ordinances of the Mormon god
(2) You have to tithe -- what Lds reference as the "Law of consecration"
(3) You have to obey the "Word of Wisdom" -- not drink coffee, etc.
(4) You have to get married -- sorry, no never-married single people allowed
(5) You have to have as many children as possible
(6) You have to perform temple work for the dead
(7) You have to perform endowments essential for this highest degree of salvation
(8) You have to be a member of the right church (Lds)
(9) You have to receive & perform the rites and ordinances established by that church
(10)You have to have Joseph Smith's consent to enter into your highest afterlife
That is 19th-20th-21st century legalism!
No wonder depression is so rampant!!!
Finally, you understand some of momronism’s teachings
(Thank you for your testimony)
“ Know that she may not marry any additional husband, here (if still married to the first one) or hereafter.”
My next door neighbor is a divorced Mormon and she uses the LDS Dating Service. There are lots of Mormons looking for new spouses either due to death or divorce.
***There are lots of Mormons looking for new spouses either due to death or divorce.***
Jodi Arias is on the hunt again. She was going with a aspiring Melchizedek priesthood holder but somehow he accidentally got 29 stabs, a slashed throat, and a bullet in the head.
She’s attractive, baptized and looks good in an orange jump suit.
Another “I’m not a mormon but..” weighing in with a Christian-bashing comment in defense of the sexist mormon doctrine and practice.
Those of us women who lived under the so-called “priesthood” tyrany of mormonism call FOUL on your rants.
Christian bashing? i was not Christian bashing, the only thing i am doing is to say that it is hypocritical for one false religion to call an other one false.
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