Ahmet: Hailo?
Jacques: Yais, vee vill defend-a-vous you from zee Ilakees.
Ahmet: Who is dis?
Jacques: Fear not. It eez I; Jacques, heir of Napoleon, leader of zee French. Vee vill defend-a-vous you.
Ahmet: The French? The French will defend the Turks? BWAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!! (tears streaming down face) BWAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!!