Skip to comments.Georgians Vote to Secede and Join Russia
Posted on 03/16/2014 4:13:07 PM PDT by vg0va3
Atlanta, GA- Voters throughout the state turned out in record numbers to vote for a referendum to secede from the United States and join Russia.
What began when a Tifton resident and Russian decedent (Alexei Sverkunova Johnson) was involved in a bar fight at the 5th Inn Lounge and Wings Place in Tifton, GA two weeks ago has escalated into international incident.
Learning of the attack in the Tifton Tribune on Mr. Johnson, Russia President Vladimir Putin immediately dispatched members of the Russian military to parachute into small South Georgia community and stand guard around Mr. Johnsons home.
Witnessing the Olympic accomplishment demonstrated by the Russian team, many residents determined they too wished to become Russian so they could continue being number 1.
Seeing this as an opportunity to avoid campaigning and simply being assigned to the lifetime position of First Secretary, the politically savvy Governor of Georgia called for the immediate referendum.
Dressed in a crisp pair of mom jeans and returning from an overnight campaign trip to California, President Obama responded to questions regarding the secession referendum stating, Let me be clear, I thought Russia had already taken Georgia. And uhh, if I remember clearly, it was George Bushs fault. Once reminded that Georgia was a member of the United States the President referred all questions to Secretary of State Kerry.
When reached for comment, Secretary Kerry stated that, The United States does not recognize the referendum of the people of Georgia. But, if that is what Vladimir wants then there must be a way to make him satisfied. The Secretary continued, By no means should our comments be taken as fighting words. The Russians won the most gold medals at the Olympics and that entitle Russia to declare that Georgia could easily be considered an extra award for their Olympic success.
Probably close to the truth.
What does Jimmy Carter have to say on this?
Bravo from a fellow Georgian.... Can I have a turtle?
Obama can take his tranny military and go back to his Chicago bath house.
If he came to my town, we would chase him to the city limits (and beyond).
His brother Billy OTOH would be welcomed because of his beer.
Why hasn't Harrisburg buried the hatchet?
Read after The Walking Dead ping...
We are old fashion USA down here. Putin is better than the little queen (Obama), but we aren't gonna become Ruskie any more than we are gonna become Obama Trannies.
It's just that Putin would fit in fine down here if he doesn't expect us to toe his Ruskie line.
In that case, we'll take Putin for a tour of the Okefenokee swamp...there are some gators who would like to make his acquaintance.
Will the Varsity still take dollars??
Will $ be worth enough to purchase one of those glorious Lil burgers?
Made me think of this:
Newt Gingrich, who lives in Virginia, is deeply saddened.
A very sore Virginia had no comment.....
Well at least we’d get commie with som b@lls, not like the one we have that wears Mom Jeans and frilly underwear!
How do you say “Whadayahave?Whadayahave?” in Russian?
“His brother Billy OTOH would be welcomed because of his beer.”
To say nothing of the tourist value since he died ~26 years ago.
Ditto for Jeff-Davis!