Posted on 11/09/2013 6:37:56 PM PST by Armen Hareyan
Simple answer is no
also simple answer... no
For some small number, it might even be through no fault of their own.
For the vast majority of estranged grandparents...I guess learning that “actions have consequences” late in life is painfull.
So No.
Access to grandchildren, merely for the sake of access, should not be a “Legal Right” IMHO.
agree.....no legal rights for grandparents.....unless they want to kick in some cash for the upbringing and the college expenses...
” most times the elder generation is dependent almost fully on the middle generation’s good nature”
In almost every instance, the parents of a son who is married, is at the mercy of their DIL. One can only hope she has a “good nature”. LOL.
Everyone has a legal right to challenge the situation. What I like is how many grandparents have stepped up in the last 20 years and brought up their grandchildren, when the parents are deadbeats or unable. Gd bless all loving grandparents.
But there is another kind of grandparent that parents need to be wary of. Some are not ok to be around kids. My,first mother in law was cruel to my child, and she had been cruel to her own son. It kind of depends on the situation. She seemed to be incapable of love. There are pervs and alcoholics that don’t deserve access.
But I don’t think a loving grandparent should ever be kept from his/her grandchild. No matter what the marital status. However, “grandparent” is only equivalent to parent (or step or such) of YOUR OWN CHILD. Once a child is adopted, for example, it’s not your grandchild; it is the grandchild of their family. You have to accept that.
its not reality sadly....
because life is not fair, and right, we still shouldn't have more legal status for grandparents.....
My mother was a certifiable nut case who beat my sister and myself bloody just about every day until we left the house for good. Once I turned 18 I was out of the house and did not have anything to do with that woman until her funeral which I attend at the request of my sister and only for my sister. I did not, and would not have allowed my mother any access to my children because I could not trust her around them.
Now on the other hand, my wife’s parents are very good people and I have my kids over as much as I can get teens to visit with them. My experience has been of two direct opposites. So my response is simply this, your rights end where someone else’s nose begins. Grand parents, and I’m likely to be one in a couple of years, do NOT have “access rights” to grand children.
If I had my way, we wouldn’t need half the laws we have. Really, in something like this we should be able to do the right thing without getting legislative bodies and the courts involved.
Ok, the ex-husband was a two timing lout. But unless the grandparents are dope smoking child molesters, surely, we can be grownups, put aside our bitterness and allow our children the enrichment of a solid relationship with their grandparents. Why punish the children because you’re mad at their father?
Websters 1828 dictionary:
"RIGHT, n.
1. Conformity to the will of God...
2. Conformity to human laws..."
Going down to:
"10. Just claim; immunity; privilege. All men have a right to the secure enjoyment of life, personal safety, liberty and property. We deem the right of trial by jury invaluable, particularly in the case of crimes. Rights are natural, civil, political, religious, personal, and public." (Emphasis added.)
In answer to the headline, NOPE.
Granting “grandparent rights” actually just further empowers the court.
No.
Parents who abandon their children should not have an automatic right to access the grandkids. But “grandparents rights” doesn’t recognize the right to say “you abandoned me, you lose your parent/grandparent card”.
No.
Usually, parents, even divorcing parents, make the best decisions they can for their children on all issues other than the soon-to-be ex-spouse. When grandparents are wrongly denied visitation, it is sad or even tragic, but the government does not exist to prevent such mistakes. Parents have authority over their children, and government should only step in to resolve parental custody.
Perhaps a responsibility of the heart. I would gladly take care of my grandchildren even if I were prone to let my children fend for themselves due to bad actions and the attendant penalties.
I agree with you.
When I was nine my father’s parents called to make arrangements to see me and my mother agreed.
They picked me up, took me out to dinner, took me to a toy store and allowed me to pick out a doll. I chose one that was wrapped in a blue blanket and I thought was adorable.
We got out to the car and I opened my prize only to find out that it was an anatomically correct little boy doll.
My grandparents took the doll from me, took me back to their hotel, told me that my choice of doll proved that I was possessed by an evil demon, and proceeded to perform a three hour exorcism on me. For hours they prayed over me, shook me, chanted, tossed me repeatedly on the bed, pinned me down and told me over and over again that I was evil and full of Satan.
I told my mom and never had to see those people again.
Grandparent’s rights my @$$. It doesn’t ‘take a village’. It takes two concerned, protective, loving parents to raise a child. Many times, parents cut off the grandparents for damn good reason.
And let me add one more thing. For years my dad had told my mom about the beatings he took as a child in the name of ‘beating out the Devil’ for every little wrong and she didn’t believe him. She’d thought that he was lying or exaggerating the incidents because ‘they seemed like such nice people’.
Once I told her what happened to me, it really opened her eyes a LOT to my father’s dysfunction and the reasons for their divorce.
Sometimes it’s bad parenting that creates bad people who screw up a marriage in the first place.
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