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My daughter's boyfriend put pressure on her to have an abortion
The Guardian ^ | August 30, 2013 | Annalisa Barbieri

Posted on 08/30/2013 9:39:01 PM PDT by Pinkbell

My daughter has been with her boyfriend for four years. He comes from a large, tight-knit family from a diaspora community. Our family is small, although also from a foreign community. My daughter has a good job with good salary, supports herself and lives on her own. Her boyfriend has a degree and a postgraduate qualification, lives with his parents and works with his father.

His parents have never taken to my daughter, until recently behaving coldly and never asking her about herself. (These are her words; I have never met them.)

I liked her boyfriend when I first met him. I have always been welcoming. He is warm and friendly, although without much depth, and, it seemed, always putting his relatives before my daughter. I had reservations about him as a long-term prospect for her. I did discuss this and she assured me they complemented each other and she wanted to marry him and for him to be the father of her children.

Last Christmas, she hoped he would ask her to marry him. Then came the bombshell. She found she was pregnant. She told him and he immediately said he didn't want her to keep it and she should have an abortion. She was very upset, calling me in tears, saying that he was putting pressure on her. I rang and asked him not to, and he said they would decide together. I have never spoken to him again.

She eventually decided to have the abortion, although right up to the day she was in turmoil as to whether it was the right decision, particularly since she had had a termination at 16. She has told me his parents don't know about it. She had asked him to tell them, but as far as we know he hasn't.

(Excerpt) Read more at theguardian.com ...


TOPICS: Culture/Society
KEYWORDS: abortion; moralabsolutes; prolife
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To: cherry
I don’t know why women are so gullible...so inclined to follow a guy......and why stay with a guy for several yrs who apparently has no intention of making it serious....

They always have been, that's why up until now young women living with their parents did not "date".

A young man interested in courting a man's daughter was expected to ask her father's permission to do so.

As far as making a final determination on marriage, a father's approval was a societal norm.

Of course, young people have always routinely flown in the face of reason, so quite often the process was far from perfect in practice. Nonetheless, it was a general guide for society, as was avoiding sex outside the bonds of marriage.

It's always worked well to fend off suitors who had no good intentions, were immature or simply did not measure up in being able to provide (as in the case of golddiggers). And women used to realize that doing this in this way has several invaluable advantages for them, for example, being able to break off or avoid a man they don't like (use father to be the "bad guy"), having someone to ask what they think about a prospect who is a) truly concerned with their happiness and b) not emotionally attached to the suitor at all, etc. Mothers participated as well in the "screening" process and of course have influence with their husbands, giving the father another invaluable viewpoint.

Breaking down that system in the America and Europe over the 19th and 20th centuries was a key part of new world order being able to break down the family structure in society and induce immorality as a culturally accepted norm.

Nowadays we would look upon such an "archaic" system with horror. We'd prefer to shack up and get married "by default" with someone we met in a bar, started dating and quickly moved in with.

It's interesting to note that new world order families mysteriously all seem to marry within their new world order clans - perhaps not so much by "force", but they certainly "clue in" their children. Sometimes a new world order daughter will marry a man who is born a "nobody" (not nwo by birth) but has worked his way up the new world order ladder as a minion/operative. NWO lives the "smart" way in this regard, and they understand the benefits of living this way, which is exactly why they want the "little people" to disregard it and live like feral pigs.
21 posted on 08/30/2013 11:07:16 PM PDT by PieterCasparzen (We have to fix things ourselves)
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To: doc1019

Are you running around telling young men to refrain from having sex?

No?

Then I have a very good idea of “where your head is at”.


22 posted on 08/30/2013 11:13:27 PM PDT by sarasmom (The obvious takes longer to discover for the obtuse.)
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To: entropy12

Nowhere near all of them are blinded by anything external to themselves.

A great many simply do not want the drain on their time and attention that a child requires. Much of the time even if they have an idea who the father was he will never know about the pregnancy.


23 posted on 08/30/2013 11:13:59 PM PDT by MrEdd (Heck? Geewhiz Cripes, thats the place where people who don't believe in Gosh think they aint going.)
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To: sarasmom

OK, gee you win. My efforts to save unborn babies are all in vane. I guess I should spend my time trying to get boys not to be boys. Time is so short, what to do, what to do.


24 posted on 08/30/2013 11:17:54 PM PDT by doc1019
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To: entropy12

>> blinded by “love”

Her need for “love” was obviously more important than life itself.


25 posted on 08/30/2013 11:21:47 PM PDT by Gene Eric (Don't be a statist!)
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To: Pinkbell
Tragic and this will haunt this girl later.
26 posted on 08/30/2013 11:24:20 PM PDT by A CA Guy ( God Bless America, God Bless and keep safe our fighting men and women.)
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To: autumnraine
What country do you live in that you can kidnap a grown woman and force her to carry a child to term?

This grown woman has the choice about whether to get pregnant or not. The child has no choice about whether he or she is conceived.

What kind of country is it that encourages killing innocent children who have no choice as a routine form of birth control?

27 posted on 08/30/2013 11:31:02 PM PDT by exDemMom (Now that I've finally accepted that I'm living a bad hair life, I'm more at peace with the world.)
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To: Pinkbell
Then came the bombshell. She found she was pregnant.

It was probably closer to this: "She decided to stop taking her birth control pills without telling her boyfriend, thinking that if she became pregnant he would be pressured into marrying her. Then she found she was pregnant, exactly as she had planned."

I once spoke with a young woman who confessed to doing exactly that. I don't know why she confided in me, but she didn't seem at all embarrassed. She was just a few months pregnant, and she intended to keep the baby. The boyfriend had so far not proposed. She thought it was possible that he would. The baby was important, the father was not. The court would force him to pay child support. She hoped she would be a good mother. The notion that a good mother tries to ensure that a father will be an active part of his child's life had apparently never occurred to her. It was all about her and her baby.

If the boyfriend of the woman in the article is actually the father, then of course he is scum to want his (or any) child aborted. That's probably why she chose him.

28 posted on 08/30/2013 11:32:43 PM PDT by TChad
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To: Pinkbell

If only she kept her knees together and just gave him a Lewinsky, a child would not have been murdered in the Womb and the Woman wouldn’t be emotionally scarred for life.


29 posted on 08/30/2013 11:32:48 PM PDT by Kickass Conservative (Liberal Democrats = Communists. RINO Republicans = Communist Sympathizers.)
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To: doc1019

You try to secretively brag about openly abusing your limited government authority, and expect me, and the rest of us here, to applaud it?


30 posted on 08/30/2013 11:33:36 PM PDT by sarasmom (The obvious takes longer to discover for the obtuse.)
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To: doc1019

thank you, the only one so far who got this right.


31 posted on 08/30/2013 11:38:11 PM PDT by Secret Agent Man (Gone Galt; Not averse to Going Bronson.)
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To: Pinkbell

The thing I don’t understand...there are so many methods of birth control. Why put yourself in the position to have to do such a thing?

Yeah...I’m not a kid. But I was at one time.


32 posted on 08/30/2013 11:38:54 PM PDT by berdie
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To: sarasmom
Secretively? No way, I do what I have to do.

abusing your limited government authority

I know my rights under the law and use that knowledge to protest with authority.

and expect me, and the rest of us here, to applaud it

No, I just want to save babies. When I stand before Jesus, I will be able to say that I did my best to save babies and that is all I ask.

What will you say?

33 posted on 08/30/2013 11:43:54 PM PDT by doc1019
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To: cherry

Why especially stay with a guy who would pressure you to kill your own child? She did have an abortion at 16, and her mom is pro-abortions, so maybe she beileves the lie that she’s just killing a nonperson, a blob of cells, a parasite, etc. However, she did have reservations, so maybe she knew deep down it was a baby, but her love for the creep prevailed, and she proceeded to have an abortion.


34 posted on 08/30/2013 11:48:06 PM PDT by Pinkbell
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To: exDemMom

I don’t disagree that abortion is horrific. It’s. the “if this was MY daughter “crap that I just wonder about the sanity.


35 posted on 08/30/2013 11:55:59 PM PDT by autumnraine (America how long will you be so deaf and dumb to thoe tumbril wheels carrying you to the guillotine?)
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To: Secret Agent Man; TChad

This is a bash men thread

How many men exactly have had abortions?

Polls wise....amongst whites... men oppose abortion more than women

And we can’t stop them legally that I know of

40 million dead babies and that blood lies directly at the feet of the women who had them

They cant be independent and subservient same time

Worst thing about white men....the only ones I can speak for us they gave their wives their balls to hold for them


36 posted on 08/31/2013 12:08:00 AM PDT by wardaddy (the next Dark Ages are coming as Western Civilization crumbles with nary a whimper)
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To: TChad

the left love forcing all the dysfunction and pitting different groups against one another. that’s one of the reasons they do all this idiot stuff.


37 posted on 08/31/2013 12:27:55 AM PDT by Secret Agent Man (Gone Galt; Not averse to Going Bronson.)
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To: wardaddy

Wardaady I love your posts.

But on this subject we may have to disagree.

The world we live in is a strange place. There is usually no commitment between a man and a women when they have sex and create another life. (Please note I did not say “make love”)

The women, in a perfect world, would be the guardians. But it is a joint decision to “hook up” for the evening.

I think the nonsense is a product of our times.


38 posted on 08/31/2013 12:39:36 AM PDT by berdie
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To: berdie

This nonsense is a byproduct of the shelving of the word SHAME and too much of the government great society which got all this really going.


39 posted on 08/31/2013 12:41:27 AM PDT by A CA Guy ( God Bless America, God Bless and keep safe our fighting men and women.)
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To: Secret Agent Man
the left love forcing all the dysfunction and pitting different groups against one another. that’s one of the reasons they do all this idiot stuff.

It works. The left tells members of various groups "You are oppressed victims!" It is an irresistible sirens' call.

40 posted on 08/31/2013 12:43:54 AM PDT by TChad
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