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Sequester Jester: Big Sis orders bagpipes for 'Homeland Security' (Bagpipe and Drum Supplies)
FedBizOpps.gov via Drudgerport.com ^ | April 11, 2013 | Drudge

Posted on 04/10/2013 11:33:33 PM PDT by Jet Jaguar

77--Bagpipe and Drum Supplies Solicitation Number: PR20074261 Agency: Department of Homeland Security Office: Customs and Border Protection Location: Procurement Directorate - DC

This is a combined synopsis/solicitation for commercial items prepared in accordance with the format in FAR Subpart 12.6, as supplemented with additional information included in this notice.The solicitation number is PR20074261 and is issued as an invitation for bids (IFB), unless otherwise indicated herein.The solicitation document and incorporated provisions and clauses are those in effect through Federal Acquisition Circular FAC 2005-66. The associated North American Industrial Classification System (NAICS) code for this procurement is 339992 with a small business size standard of 500.00 employees.This requirement is a [ Small Business ] set-aside and only qualified offerors may submit bids.The solicitation pricing on www.FedBid.com will start on the date this solicitation is posted and will end on 2013-04-17 11:30:00.0 Eastern Time or as otherwise displayed at www.FedBid.com.FOB Destination shall be Washington, DC 20229

The DHS Customs and Border Protection requires the following items, Brand Name or Equal, to the following: LI 001: Carbon Bagpipe Drone Reed Set, 5, EA; LI 002: Bagpipe Chanter Reeds-Easy, 12, EA; LI 003: Bagpipe Chanter Reeds-Medium, 12, EA; LI 004: Deluxe Bagpipe Bag Covers w/ Non-slip Grap Patch and Zipper, 5, EA; LI 005: Drone Cords, 5, EA; LI 006: Highland Bagpipe Tuner and Metronome with cases, 2, EA; LI 007: Combination Tuner and Metronome, 6, EA; LI 008: Black Polypenco Bagpipes w/ cases, 10, EA; LI 009: Polypenco Bagpipe Chanter, 10, EA; LI 010: Bellows Blown Blackwood Smallpipes in "A" w/ cases, 4, EA; LI 011: Black waxed bagpipe hemp, 4, EA; LI 012: Real Beeswax, 4, EA; LI 013: Long Polypenco Practice Chanters, 10, EA; LI 014: Bagpipe Tutor Book - VOL 1 C.O.P., 10, EA; LI 015: Practice Chanter Reed, 10, EA; LI 016: Rol of Pipe Bag Tie-In cord, 2, EA; LI 017: Tapered Reamer, 1, EA; LI 018: PiobMaster 2.3 CD ROM-Bagpipe music writing software, 1, EA; LI 019: Pipe Band Base Drum Carrier, 2, EA; LI 020: Folding Bass Drum Stand, 1, EA; LI 021: Inverness Rain Cape, 14, EA; LI 022: Glengarry Plain, 15, EA; LI 023: Snare Drum Stand, 4, EA; LI 024: Pipe Band Snare Drums-Black, 4, EA; LI 025: Snare Carrier-Silver, 4, EA; LI 026: 16" x 12" Pipe Band Tenor Drum, 4, EA; LI 027: 18" Bodhran Pack w/ Beater, 4, EA; LI 028: Deluxe triple function drum sling, 2, EA; LI 029: Heavy Duty Tenor Drum leg rest, 2, EA; LI 030: Drum-Mount Snare Drum stick bag, 4, EA; LI 031: Heavy Duty Drum Key, 2, EA; LI 032: Short Black Classic Tenor Mallets, 3, EA; LI 033: Black Bass Beaters, 2, EA; LI 034: TyFry Tenor Tutor Tenor Instruction DVD/CDROM, 1, EA; LI 035: Snare Stick Set, 10, EA; LI 036: Square Tenor/Snare Drum Case, 5, EA; LI 037: Spats Canvas-White, 20, EA; LI 038: Hose-Blue, 14, EA; LI 039: Flashes-Red, 14, EA; LI 040: Leather Day Sporrans-Black, 14, EA; LI 041: Horsehair Sporrans, 14, EA; LI 042: Sgian Dubhs, 14, EA; LI 043: Shipping/Handling/Delivery, 1, EA;


TOPICS: Business/Economy; Government
KEYWORDS: bag; bagpipes; dhsbagpipes; gasbag; hosebagsecurity; oldbag; oldbaghag; oldhagbag; reamers; sequester

1 posted on 04/10/2013 11:33:33 PM PDT by Jet Jaguar
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To: Nachum

Ping


2 posted on 04/10/2013 11:34:57 PM PDT by Jet Jaguar
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To: Jet Jaguar

Proves she’s a gasbag...


3 posted on 04/10/2013 11:40:50 PM PDT by Vendome (Don't take life so seriously, you won't live through it anyway)
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To: Jet Jaguar

Mexican sombreros would be more appropriate.


4 posted on 04/10/2013 11:43:33 PM PDT by laplata (Liberals will never get it. Their minds have been stolen.)
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To: Jet Jaguar

Line Item 017: Tapered Reamer, 1 EA


5 posted on 04/10/2013 11:51:03 PM PDT by rfp1234 (Arguing with a marxist is like playing Chess with a Pigeon.)
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To: Jet Jaguar

Don’t forget, the USCG is part of “Homeland Security” now: http://www.uscgpipeband.org


6 posted on 04/10/2013 11:52:48 PM PDT by Drago
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To: Jet Jaguar

Having to listen to bagpipes is worse than water boarding! Personally I’d rather be shot by one of those 40 cal hollow points than have to listen to a screeching windbag like Napalitano. Pun intended.


7 posted on 04/10/2013 11:53:46 PM PDT by ImNotLying (The MSM bears a close resemblance to the world's oldest profession!)
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To: Jet Jaguar

LI 031 Black Bass Beaters. Would go well with the tapered reamer.
Janet is planning something kinky.


8 posted on 04/11/2013 12:00:19 AM PDT by rfp1234 (Arguing with a marxist is like playing Chess with a Pigeon.)
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To: rfp1234

If Big Sis can’t get under some poor guy’s kilt with that Tapered Reamer, all she has to do is yank his Non-slip Grap Patch and Zipper.


9 posted on 04/11/2013 12:07:38 AM PDT by haroldeveryman
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To: ImNotLying

Kinder, gentler interrogations, and leaves no mark.


10 posted on 04/11/2013 12:18:00 AM PDT by gleeaikin
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To: Jet Jaguar

This is very interesting.

So Zero *is* bulding DHS into a personal Praetorian thing, with Parade units?

Remember who else had an obsession with scottish parade finery?

Idi Amin.


11 posted on 04/11/2013 12:23:17 AM PDT by Hardraade (http://junipersec.wordpress.com (Vendetta))
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To: rfp1234

There’s got to be a Weiner joke in here someplace.


12 posted on 04/11/2013 12:25:11 AM PDT by haroldeveryman
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To: Hardraade

“Remember who else had an obsession with scottish parade finery?”

A lot of similarities but our brief-a$$ resident will need to eat a few more of his subjects to fit into Idi’s trousers.


13 posted on 04/11/2013 12:32:09 AM PDT by beelzepug (Telling other people they need to die is a good way to get your own lamp blown out.)
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To: Jet Jaguar

This sounds like they (Hopefully) will be purchasing Red Uniforms and when they come for ‘our guns’ they will march through the woods and fields in columns, with pipers and drummers in all their finery marking cadence.

It worked once before so it should work again.

(For US, the Patriots, not the Red Coats)


14 posted on 04/11/2013 12:32:26 AM PDT by xrmusn (6/98 --I turn 75 next year- but remember, that's only 24 Celsius. (TKS R. Reagan))
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To: Jet Jaguar

Bagpipes? Hmmmm Must be planning a bunch of funerals...


15 posted on 04/11/2013 2:38:50 AM PDT by OrioleFan (Republicans believe every day is July 4th, Democrats believe every day is April 15th.)
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To: OrioleFan

I hope we are wrong.


16 posted on 04/11/2013 3:13:36 AM PDT by momincombatboots (Back to West by G-d Virginia.)
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To: Hardraade

“Remember who else had an obsession with scottish parade finery?

Idi Amin.”

Liked to eat liver too.


17 posted on 04/11/2013 3:27:10 AM PDT by Dr. Bogus Pachysandra ( Ya can't pick up a turd by the clean end!)
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To: Jet Jaguar

Instead of shooting the American People.She can torture them instead using bagpipes.

I couldn’t think of a bigger waste of money.Like homeland security really needs bagpipes to boost its oversized ego.


18 posted on 04/11/2013 3:54:05 AM PDT by puppypusher (The World is going to the dogs.)
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To: Jet Jaguar

I think strategically placed bagpipes along the border would effectively reduce illegal immigration. Guns and bullets are only a threat, the sound of a bagpipe is real!


19 posted on 04/11/2013 4:01:21 AM PDT by ThePatriotsFlag ( EVERY DIME Obama Spends is given to him by the Republicans in the House.)
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To: Jet Jaguar

Hmm....spats, blue hose, leather day sporrans, horsehair sporrans, and Sgian Dubhs. No other Scots clothing. Sounds like one kinky full Monty pipe and drum corps.


20 posted on 04/11/2013 4:31:57 AM PDT by Covenantor ("Men are ruled...by liars who refuse them news, and by fools who cannot govern." Chesterton)
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To: OrioleFan

My first thought as well...


21 posted on 04/11/2013 4:52:41 AM PDT by gov_bean_ counter (Romans 1:22 Professing themselves to be wise, they became fools,)
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To: Jet Jaguar

Well, this explains why I haven’t seen any bagpipes on the ammo shelves at the stores.


22 posted on 04/11/2013 4:53:08 AM PDT by Disambiguator
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To: rfp1234

—— Black Bass Beaters-—

That’s racist


23 posted on 04/11/2013 4:59:18 AM PDT by bert ((K.E. N.P. N.C. +12 .....History is a process, not an event)
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To: OrioleFan

That may be the exclamation point. I thought the same thing. Lets see if they are hiring chaplains. May we are going to get started soon.


24 posted on 04/11/2013 5:05:03 AM PDT by DeWalt
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To: Jet Jaguar

Homeland Insecurity already has a bag. Just shove a pipe in her.


25 posted on 04/11/2013 5:13:35 AM PDT by IbJensen (Liberals are like Slinkies, good for nothing, but you smile as you push them down the stairs.)
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To: rfp1234

She’s already the #1 (beating out Hillary and Rozie) promoter of Snap-On-Tools.


26 posted on 04/11/2013 5:15:04 AM PDT by IbJensen (Liberals are like Slinkies, good for nothing, but you smile as you push them down the stairs.)
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To: OrioleFan

BINGO!


27 posted on 04/11/2013 5:37:12 AM PDT by DarkWaters ("Deception is a state of mind --- and the mind of the state" --- James Jesus Angleton)
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To: Jet Jaguar

order’s been pulled now, via drudge.

THANKS for posting this monument to their lack of perspective.


28 posted on 04/11/2013 7:41:36 AM PDT by cyn (Benghazi.)
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To: Jet Jaguar; NorwegianViking; ExTexasRedhead; HollyB; FromLori; EricTheRed_VocalMinority; ...

The list, Ping

Let me know if you would like to be on or off the ping list

http://www.nachumlist.com/


29 posted on 04/11/2013 9:29:34 AM PDT by Nachum (The Obama "List" at www.nachumlist.com)
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To: Nachum

Please put me on the list.


30 posted on 04/11/2013 8:34:55 PM PDT by DarkWaters ("Deception is a state of mind --- and the mind of the state" --- James Jesus Angleton)
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To: Saoirise
Hmmmmm...Wasn't Braveheart on tonight?

"They are saying goodbye in their own way. Playing outlawed tunes on outlawed pipes."

31 posted on 04/11/2013 10:15:13 PM PDT by 444Flyer (MARANATHA!)
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To: 444Flyer

Aye, it was.


32 posted on 04/11/2013 10:29:06 PM PDT by Saoirise (Free Larry Hutchins - USMC)
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To: Jet Jaguar

“if you want to play in the Texas, you gotta have a bagpipe in the band...”


33 posted on 05/03/2013 10:26:25 AM PDT by TurboZamboni (Marx smelled bad & lived with his parents most his life.)
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