The Secret to Longevity: Get a Second Wife, Study Says

FoxNews ^

[Scythian]

Researchers from the U.K.'s University of Sheffield looked at men older than 60 from 140 countries that practice polygamy and found that they lived an average of 12 percent longer than men from 49 monogamous nations, according to a report from the Times of India.

...

Scientists believe women, who live considerably longer post-menopause than other mammals, do so because the longer they live the more grandchildren they have to dote on. Caring for grandchildren, it seems, gives women a reason to live long after they're no longer able to reproduce.

[Scythian]

Two things:

1) I'm going to send this to my wife and see and see if she'll go for it.

2) If I get the 2nd wife promise never to call either one of them mammals as the article does.

[null and void]

Yeah?

Do you live longer, or does it just seem that way?

[driftdiver]

Good luck, and hopefully it won’t hurt too much.

Lets see this came out of the UK where there have been calls for Sharia law. Wonder if that has anything to do with it.

[impeachedrapist]

I can’t even keep one woman happy, and this article wants me to add a second mission impossible? No thanks.

[martin_fierro]

The Secret to Longevity: Get a Second Wife -- And Don't Let Either Know About The Other

[fanfan]

Do you think John Edwards received an advanced copy of this report?

[doodad]

My wife assured me that it would have a negative effect on my longevity in a terminal and immediate manner.

[AU72]

"If you want to be happy for the rest of your life,"
"Get an ugly woman for your wife"

[thulldud]

“Here’s to our wives and lady friends (and may they never meet!)”

[tx_eggman]

Down here in Texas the penalty for bigamy is ...

.

.

.

Two wives

ba-da-bing

[libs_kma]

"The Secret to Longevity: Get a Second Wife -- And Don't Let Either Know About The Other"

2 wives? Are you nuts?

If I get a 2nd wife, I'm getting rid of the 1st one first.

[ladtx]

Great. One for each ear.

[DouglasKC]

My wife assured me that it would have a negative effect on my longevity in a terminal and immediate manner.

lol...that was the first thing that I thought of too.

[Radl]

I think i’ll get a young one about 22. Thank God my wife doesn’t know i’m typing this commentsdfddaafd’fgb3q vdfsagqgqg0(((.

[Politicalmom]

I like your wife. :)

[Hegemony Cricket]

Hehehe - does seem a little counter-intuitive, doesn’t it?

[null and void]

If I get a 2nd wife, I'm getting rid of the 1st one first.

You're never fully rid of her until the last alimony/child support check clears...

[vietvet67]

Two guys, one old and one young, are pushing their carts around Home Depot when they collide.

The old guy says to the young guy, “Sorry about that. I’m looking for my wife, and I guess I wasn’t paying attention to where I was going.”

The young guy says, “That’s OK. It’s a coincidence. I’m looking for my wife, too. I can’t find her and I’m getting a little desperate.

The old guy says, “Well, maybe we can help each other. What does your wife look like?

The young guy says, “Well, she is 27 yrs old, tall, with red hair, blue eyes, long legs, big boobs, and she’s wearing tight white shorts. What does your wife look like?”

The old guy says, “Doesn’t matter -— let’s look for yours.

[VRWCmember]

Researchers from the U.K.'s University of Sheffield looked at men older than 60 from 140 countries that practice polygamy and found that they lived an average of 12 percent longer than men from 49 monogamous nations, according to a report from the Times of India.

With two mothers-in-law, it just seems like so much longer before you die.

[NeoCaveman]

With two mothers-in-law, it just seems like so much longer before you die.

If you marry sisters then you only have one mother in law.

[VRWCmember]

Brilliant!

[GOP Poet]

bookmark

[VRWCmember]

Brilliant!

[MrB]

Scientists believe women, who live considerably longer post-menopause than other mammals, do so because the longer they live the more grandchildren they have to dote on. Caring for grandchildren, it seems, gives women a reason to live long after they're no longer able to reproduce.

Amazing how "scientists" find out the truth, eventually.

Titus 2:3-5
Older women likewise are to be reverent in their behavior, not malicious gossips nor enslaved to much wine, teaching what is good, so that they may encourage the young women to love their husbands, to love their children, to be sensible, pure, workers at home, kind, being subject to their own husbands, so that the word of God will not be dishonored.

[jrestrepo]

You made me laugh out loud!!!

[NCjim]

Tell me about it - my sentiments exactly!

[PugetSoundSoldier]

The Secret to Longevity: Get a Second Wife -- And Don't Let Either Know About The Other

That's the easy part... The hard part is keeping both of them unaware of the girlfriends and mistresses...

[doodad]

If you marry sisters then you only have one mother in law.

And you get to ride in the rodeo.

[KarlInOhio]

How much of this is effect and effect rather than cause and effect? In countries that practice polygamy, the men who can afford multiple wives are generally richer than those who can afford only one or even none. Thus you are comparing the upper half or third of the polygamous nations with the average from monogamous nations.

[Revolting cat!]

Better yet, marry a pair of twins (just not these)!

[BuffaloJack]

> 1) I’m going to send this to my wife and see and see if she’ll go for it.

If your wife is anything like mine, then just asking will make your life substantially shorter.

[NonLinear]

Actually the truth is simple to understand:

If you have two wives, then they can talk to each other and you can get some work done in peace....

[CholeraJoe]

If you marry your own sister, you don’t have one at all.

[PureSolace]

[MosesKnows]

the last alimony/child support check clears...

When I was married 25 years, I took a look at my wife one day and said, "Honey, 25 years ago, we had a cheap apartment, a cheap car, slept on a sofa bed and watched a 10 inch black and white TV, but I got to sleep every night with a hot 25 year old blonde.

Now, we have a nice house, nice car, big bed, and plasma screen TV, but I'm sleeping with a 50-year-old woman. It seems to me that you are not holding up your side of things."

My wife is a very reasonable woman. She told me to go out and find a hot 25-year-old blonde, and she would make sure that I would once again be living in a cheap apartment, driving a cheap car, and sleeping on a sofa bed.

Aren't older women great? They really know to solve your mid-life crises....

[Red in Blue PA]

ROTFLOL!

[eccentric]

Perhaps they should check on the status of mothers-in-law.

[Rottweilerson]

LOL, I love when funny threads come up seemingly by accident, FReepers have the best sense of humor!

[dfwgator]

Yeah, but look at the bright side. Now you can fall asleep right after sex, and she can still have someone else she can talk to. ;)

[impeachedrapist]

After sex? I'm lucky if I can stay awake through the foreplay.

[Scythian]

I see these comments alot on the FR, are you guys serious, you run around on your wives?

[John Will]

Reminds me to never get married ;)

[PugetSoundSoldier]

It’s TOTALLY tongue-in-cheek. Hey, if you’ve already got a second wife, what’s the problem with adding a few girlfriends on the side?