Condiment nazis? Send them to the salt mines!

The Daily Mail Online - U.K. ^ | June 30, 2008 | Richard Littlejohn

[r_barton]

The Government yesterday announced what it described as a 'comprehensive shakeup' of local government priorities for the next three years.

At least one council has decided to take the guidance literally. Officials in Gateshead have been touring chip shops confiscating salt shakers with more than five holes in them.

They have spent £2,000 on replacements, which are being given away free.

[John123]

About $4,000 in U.S. dollars. Eek!

[robomatik]

"What they haven't factored in is the ingenuity of chip shop customers, who will sprinkle on however much salt they fancy. Fewer holes simply means they shake for longer. "

they never thought of screwing the lid off to save time?

[r_barton]

The nanny government will even tell you how many holes you can have in your salt shaker. What’s next?

[r_barton]

They will have locking salt shakers next. ;-)

[goldstategop]

I guess if you salt those fish and chips too much, its the end of the world.

"Show me just what Mohammed brought that was new, and there you will find things only evil and inhuman, such as his command to spread by the sword the faith he preached." - Manuel II Palelologus

[ProtectOurFreedom]

Keep reading the article. That’s exactly what they do.

Reminds me of the stupid flow restricter in my new kitchen faucet. I have to run the darn thing three times as long to fill the sink.

[robomatik]

or they might just legislate that a restaurant has to weigh you, measure your height, check your bmi, and do tests to ensure that you are not diabetic, lactose intolerant, have gout, allergic to peanuts, suffer from hyper-tension, or an irregular heartbeat -before signing papers that alleviate the establishment from any responsibility for you decision(s).

:^)

[mountainbunny]

Trade them with the pepper shakers, which have more holes.

For free.

That’s what we did.
::rolls eyes::

[Mr Ramsbotham]

So the so few, to whom so much was owed by so many, didn’t really keep the Nazis out of Britain after all. Well, they tried.

[Jeff Chandler]

Reminds me of the stupid flow restricter in my new kitchen faucet.

If it's like the ones in shower heads, it's a plastic disc which can be reamed larger.

[muir_redwoods]

"4000 holes in Blackburn Lancashire..."

[Gabz]

Nanny State Ping....

Whatever will they think of next? I know, how about making the smokers go outside, oh wait.............

[Diana in Wisconsin]

BUMP! I’m off to the Salt Mines myself, so I’ll read this later. :)

[Graybeard58]

they never thought of screwing the lid off to save time?

My wife does that with a pepper shaker and only on scrambled eggs. She likes scrambled eggs but just doesn't like to look at them while eating them.

That's the worst quirk she has that I can think of, so I'll probably keep her.

[patton]

CS Lewis: “Of all tyrannies, a tyranny exercised for the good of its victims may be the most oppressive. It may be better to live under robber barons than under omnipotent moral busybodies. The robber baron’s cruelty may sometimes sleep, his cupidity may at some point be satiated; but those who torment us for our own good will torment us without end, for they do so with the approval of their own conscience.”

Prophetic, wasn’t he?

[Fellow Traveler]

If it's like the ones in shower heads, it's a plastic disc which can be reamed larger.

or removed entirely

[libertarian27]

Thanks for the ping.

I think Britain will implode before the US.

[Alamo-Girl]

Thanks for the ping!

[elkfersupper]

Government specifications on salt shakers (shaking head).

These people don't have enough to do. Consequently, they need to be dodging bullets and looking for cover.

[elkfersupper]

Reminds me of the stupid flow restricter in my new kitchen faucet. I have to run the darn thing three times as long to fill the sink.

Two pair of channel-lock pliers will fix that.

This is why I carry those and my own shower head whenever I have to stay in a hotel / motel.

[Grizzled Bear]

The nanny government will even tell you how many holes you can have in your salt shaker. What’s next?

Premeasured, prepackaged portions of salt. If the merchant gives a customer more than one packet they will be closed down.

[mountn man]

Ping-a ling

[Vigilanteman]

More gems from the way Brits write (same page, further down):

The number of people claiming to have bad backs has doubled under Labour to 148,000 - including a bodybuilder who was paid £43,000 for sciatica while holding the title of Cornwall's Strongest Man.

That's $85,000 American. Not too shabby for a disability payment!

[Grizzled Bear]

That's $85,000 American. Not too shabby for a disability payment!

Double Plus Good!

[peggybac]

When I lived in Los Angeles, I’d often back a shower head from KC when I visited. Can’t beat a nice shower.

[Rebelbase]

the holes were rather small.

[Califreak]

Now that’s just goofy!

Some people actually need extra salt or they will get sick!