Posted on 05/13/2008 1:58:32 PM PDT by forkinsocket
RIYADH, Saudi Arabia — The dance party in Atheer Jassem al-Othman’s living room was in full swing. The guests — about two dozen girls in their late teens — had arrived, and Ms. Othman and her mother were passing around cups of sweet tea and dishes of dates.
About half the girls were swaying and gyrating, without the slightest self-consciousness, among overstuffed sofas, heavy draperies, tables larded with figurines and ornately-covered tissue boxes. Their head-to-toe abayas, balled up and tossed onto chairs, looked like black cloth puddles.
Suddenly, the music stopped, and an 18-year-old named Alia tottered forward.
“Girls? I have something to tell you,” Alia faltered, appearing to sway slightly on her high heels. She paused anxiously, and the next words came out in a rush. “I’ve gotten engaged!” There was a chorus of shrieks at the surprise announcement and Alia burst into tears, as did several of the other girls.
Ms. Othman’s mother smiled knowingly and left the room, leaving the girls to their moment of emotion. The group has been friends since they were of middle-school age, and Alia would be the first of them to marry.
A cellphone picture of Alia’s fiancé — a 25-year-old military man named Badr — was passed around, and the girls began pestering Alia for the details of her showfa. A showfa — literally, a “viewing” — usually occurs on the day that a Saudi girl is engaged.
A girl’s suitor, when he comes to ask her father for her hand in marriage, has the right to see her dressed without her abaya.
(Excerpt) Read more at nytimes.com ...
How special.
How can girls love a man they barely know and are barely allowed to get to know?
I wonder if he has the right to back out if he doesn't like what he sees.
Must be OK, the NYTs likes it.
ping
Philosophically agree. However, there was a time that the phrase “molder bride” was common here in the U.S. And, I don't have any proof but I bet the divorce rate was low (I know, it was a long walk back to civilization)...
And American so-called feminists have nothing to say.
The NYT let one of the girls get away with the Fraudi Arabia/Regency England comparison too. Absurd. Elizabeth Bennett and Mr. Darcy got to court openly and dance together. Lizzie could show her face, wear form-fitting clothes, ride horses, drive her own carriage, flirt with men, and dance with men, all without fear of being “honor” killed, jailed, lashed, or losing her head. Georgian England in the 18th and early 19th centuries was light years ahead of Fraudi Arabia with respect to the treatment of women.
No, but under Sharia law, he has the right to cut her throat for the slightest offense, real or imagined.
If he marries, he only needs to repeat three times “I divorce you” and the marriage is over. So I suspect he can back out pre-engagement even more easily.
There was an article recently about whether the thrice-stated divorce was effective when given by text message.
Did somebody tell Paul McCartney about all this?
By Georgian times, England had had 2 queens rule their nation (maybe more, but Elizabeth and Mary for certain). By that measure alone, women had far more rights than they do in Saudi Arabia today.
Wait until she gets the the Ceremonial Rape on her wedding night.
And allah help her, if she can’t “prove” her virginity with the ceremonial display of bloody bed sheets.
I wonder if Alia was a victim of ritual genital mutilation, common in Mooselimb society?
She sounds a little too happy, maybe the local midwife with the rusty knife overlooked her?
It's a cultural value with them ~ they've always used marriage as their version of Social Security.
Deal or no deal
Concerning your comment about Saudis-no argument here; the hypocrisy of these people is almost endless. In addition to their high divorce rate, they love to go to Europe and party hardy with lots of drinking and carrousing. They seem to highly favor our western blond “prom queens”...
I simply ignored “molder bride” ~ entirely too esoteric for me to have ever had anything to do with that concept being the middle of the road guy I am.
We never got a follow up as to how the story ended. Seems like the Saudi press hoped the original story would fall down a memory hole which it did.
I guess Saudi marriage is like Forrest Gump’s box of chocolates statement.
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