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Men Receiving Alimony Want A Little Respect
Wall Street Journal ^ | 1 April 2008 | ANITA RAGHAVAN

Posted on 04/01/2008 4:34:42 PM PDT by shrinkermd

...In the nearly 30 years since the U.S. Supreme Court ruled against gender discrimination in alimony, few male beneficiaries have stepped forward to talk about it. Those who did typically went by pseudonyms or the golden rule of 12-step recovery: first names only.

Little wonder, considering the attention that has come to some former husbands of alimony-paying celebrities. "Why the courts don't tell a husband, who has been living off his wife, to go out and get a job is beyond my comprehension," Joan Lunden, the television personality, said in 1992 when a court ordered her to pay her ex-husband $18,000 a month.

But today's men are shaking off the stigma of being supported by their ex-wives. Several agreed to talk on the record for this article, in part because they say the popular image of the male alimony recipient is unfair: He's not always a slacker.

Mr. Castellanos says he has acted in or produced five movies since the breakup of his marriage, including a couple of projects that he says are nearing completion. If any of these projects strike gold, he says he would gladly forgo alimony. Even Ms. Lunden has had a change of heart. Through a former publicist, she now says of her 1992 comment: "That was a statement made in haste many years ago. I regret having said it."

(Excerpt) Read more at online.wsj.com ...


TOPICS: Culture/Society
KEYWORDS: alimony; dignity; divorce; men

1 posted on 04/01/2008 4:34:43 PM PDT by shrinkermd
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To: shrinkermd

Sounds like John Kerry to me.


2 posted on 04/01/2008 4:36:22 PM PDT by LetsRok
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To: shrinkermd

I admit I feel a double standard here.


3 posted on 04/01/2008 4:38:31 PM PDT by gondramB (Preach the Gospel at all times, and when necessary, use words.)
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To: shrinkermd
Men Receiving Alimony Want A Little Respect

They'll get none from me! Get a job, weenie!

4 posted on 04/01/2008 4:46:09 PM PDT by gridlock (If a man will throw his own Grandma under the bus, how bad will he treat you, given the chance?)
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To: shrinkermd

I always knew there were good reasons for marrying a rich broad. Now, I see it works out even if a guy gets divorced.


5 posted on 04/01/2008 4:48:55 PM PDT by Emmett McCarthy
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To: shrinkermd
Even Ms. Lunden has had a change of heart. Through a former publicist, she now says of her 1992 comment: "That was a statement made in haste many years ago. I regret having said it."

I do not detect anything in this carefully worded statement through her publicist that Joan Lunden has had a change of heart. She may regret making the statement, but that is not the same thing as changing her mind. Not by a long shot.

6 posted on 04/01/2008 4:49:38 PM PDT by gridlock (If a man will throw his own Grandma under the bus, how bad will he treat you, given the chance?)
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To: shrinkermd

Respect!

How ‘bout a Hi-Five!


7 posted on 04/01/2008 4:51:10 PM PDT by Randy Larsen (Arrogance IS my virtue!)
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To: shrinkermd

(I’m gonna) walk like a man
Fast as I can
Walk like a man from you
I’ll tell the world to forget about it girl
And walk like a man from you


8 posted on 04/01/2008 4:51:55 PM PDT by donna (The United States Constitution and the Koran are mutually exclusive.)
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To: shrinkermd

I don’t understand why people knock the guys. Do people think that in marriages where the lady makes tons of money and the guy doesn’t that she really works with him to try to follow his dreams too? I would bet that Joan Lunden’s husband made the same sacrifices as women do when the guy is the one striking it rich.

I mean, it really does make sense for the team to put most of its efforts into the one who can make the most money when there is vast discrepancy, and that makes no difference which one is the one on the paycheck.


9 posted on 04/01/2008 4:52:50 PM PDT by krb (If you're not outraged, people probably like having you around.)
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To: shrinkermd
"Why the courts don't tell a husband, who has been living off his wife, to go out and get a job is beyond my comprehension," Joan Lunden, the television personality, said

Why the courts don't tell a gold-digging bimbo, who has been leaching off her husband, to go out and get a job is beyond MY comprehension.

10 posted on 04/01/2008 4:54:27 PM PDT by Old Sarge (CTHULHU '08 - I won't settle for a lesser evil any longer!)
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To: shrinkermd

I don’t even respect women that receive alimony. I RESECT MEN EVEN LESS THAT DO.


11 posted on 04/01/2008 4:55:25 PM PDT by mamelukesabre (Quantum materiae materietur marmota monax si marmota monax materiam possit materiari?)
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To: gridlock

Just another reason to accept the fact that marriage is irreversibly broken. Somewhere along the way somehow it has been slowly reduced to nothing more than a simple contract between two people.

No longer to the vows mean anything.

My wife just left me recently w/o any warning, just walked out.

It’s my second failed marriage.

First one I was just young and so was she, or so I convinced myself but now with my second one going down the tubes I have accepted the fact that the union of marriage is broken and that maybe it has been all my fault.


12 posted on 04/01/2008 4:56:21 PM PDT by The Magical Mischief Tour
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To: The Magical Mischief Tour

I’m sorry to hear that. You should read one of Dr. Laura’s books. She likes men and has an interesting point of view.


13 posted on 04/01/2008 5:00:44 PM PDT by donna (The United States Constitution and the Koran are mutually exclusive.)
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To: donna
I had too much pride to ask for alimony back then. I might react differently now....hmmm.... But heck I could never collect child support!

These guys are whiners. Didn't we use to call them gigolo’s?Undoubtedly there are a few men who might deserve it. Someone who propels his wife to fame at his sacrifice or he's raising the kids. It must happen, though I can't site an instance off hand.

14 posted on 04/01/2008 5:01:21 PM PDT by AuntB ('If there must be trouble let it be in my day, that my child may have peace." T. Paine)
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To: The Magical Mischief Tour

I’m so sorry!! I hate to see any marriage break up. I still can’t tell you if I stayed too long or not long enough. Take care.


15 posted on 04/01/2008 5:06:12 PM PDT by AuntB ('If there must be trouble let it be in my day, that my child may have peace." T. Paine)
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To: AuntB

Stop me before I hurt myself, LOL:

Just a gigolo, everywhere I go
People know the part I’m playing
Paid for every dance
Selling each romance
Every night some heart betraying
There will come a day
Youth will pass away
Then what will they say about me
When the end comes I know
They’ll say just a gigolo
As life goes on without me


16 posted on 04/01/2008 5:09:21 PM PDT by donna (The United States Constitution and the Koran are mutually exclusive.)
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To: shrinkermd
"I feel financially raped," says Rhonda Friedman, the former wife of Mr. Castellanos.

In other words, I'm a woman, I think I got a raw deal, I'll say I was raped. No man can top that. I'm a victim. Yay me!

17 posted on 04/01/2008 5:13:17 PM PDT by ClearCase_guy
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To: donna

lol


18 posted on 04/01/2008 5:13:47 PM PDT by AuntB ('If there must be trouble let it be in my day, that my child may have peace." T. Paine)
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To: LetsRok

Sounds EXACTLY like john Kerry to me.


19 posted on 04/01/2008 5:19:19 PM PDT by Farmer Dean (168 grains of instant conflict resolution)
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To: The Magical Mischief Tour

It is a difficult time to be married, that is for sure. I’m knocking on wood as I type.

It is a shame that your wife just walked out, and you never had an opportunity to mend whatever was broken. That seems like an awful waste.

While healthy introspection is always a good thing, you should not jump to the conclusion that you are necessarily at fault because you have had two failed marriages. That is not an unusual record these days, with so many marriages failing. Improve yourself, as always, and try not to repeat mistakes. But that goes for any of us in any situation.


20 posted on 04/01/2008 5:22:20 PM PDT by gridlock (If a man will throw his own Grandma under the bus, how bad will he treat you, given the chance?)
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To: Old Sarge

“Why the courts don’t tell a gold-digging bimbo, who has been leaching off her husband, to go out and get a job is beyond MY comprehension.”

BTTT!!!!


21 posted on 04/01/2008 6:00:52 PM PDT by EEDUDE
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To: shrinkermd

If I ever divorce someone who makes significantly more than I, my receiving alimony would be highly dependent on just how much of The C-Word she was during the marriage.

I guarantee you there will be a point where I’ll tell my lawyer “bleed the bitch dry.”


22 posted on 04/01/2008 6:04:47 PM PDT by Free Vulcan (Fight back or STFU!!!)
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