Posted on 05/21/2006 10:10:22 AM PDT by wesley_windam-price
Near the restaurant where Mao Zedong and President Nixon shared roast duck during the heady days of 'ping pong diplomacy', Beijing's new ducks strut their stuff at a popular nightspot. They are easy to pick out: in tight clothes and sunglasses, the ducks sway to the beat and scan the seething dance floor. For many Chinese women, male prostitutes - yazi, or 'ducks', after their female equivalents ji, or chicken - are an increasingly essential part of a girls' night out. Xiao Yu, a prostitute in his twenties who sports a tight red T-shirt with aviators atop spiked hair, is agitated: 'I really can't talk. This is working time.' Xu Wen, his pimp, runs a tight ship, roaming the club, checking on his boys, ensuring that the women in the private rooms at the back are happy. 'Women pay,' he says, 'to buy a duck for a few hours of chatting, drinking and flirting. If they then want to rent a hotel room for the night, the price rises.' All the yazi in the nightclub earn as much as seven times the city's average wage.
(Excerpt) Read more at observer.guardian.co.uk ...
Of course, the women who pay for gigilos are old and ugly otherwise they wouldn't have to pay!
No wonder BIRD FLU originated in China.
I'm down with you on that. Did the story ever mention what the bill was?
I never realised Chinese women were that hard up.
If Helen Thomas goes over I would imagine a lot of Chinese boy prostitutes would hang up their spurs.
I always hate to be the one to crash a jolly illusion, but there are some nasty, disease-causing microorganisms flying around out there that are hard to duck.
I'm sure the men-seeking-boys trade is more robust and profitable, but China wouldn't allow coverage of it and the Guardian wouldn't print it anyway.
She describes how the first time she took a duck home they chatted, listened to music and showered before getting into bed. 'I wouldn't say he was a particularly skilled lover - just average, nothing special.'Why do it if it's not special?
Odd.
D
Why do it if it's not special?
Answer is pretty obvious. She ain't getting it at home.
HEADLINE: Al Gore Ducks Hillary Question
Well that was just fowl.
I've done it plenty of times when it was nothing special. More to the point: why PAY for it if it's not special? You'd think the cold hard renminbi's would get you something.
Maybe it should be seen in light of existing [and looming to the much greater extent] gender imbalance in China.
Fred Garvin, Male Prostitute
Mrs. Potter.....Margot Kidder
Fred Garvin.....Dan Aykroyd
Slick.....Garrett Morris
[ open on Mrs. Potter lying in bed in hotel room, as a knock is heard at the door ]
Mrs. Potter: I'm coming, I'm coming.. [ opens door ] Hello?
Fred Garvin: [ entering ] Mrs. Potter?
Mrs. Potter: Yes.. that's me.
Fred Garvin: The same Mrs. Potter who's Vice-President, in charge of loans for the Franklin National Bank in Chicago.
Mrs. Potter: Yeah, that's me.
Fred Garvin: Here, this is for you.
Mrs. Potter: Oh, thank you. Thank you very much.
Fred Garvin: May I come in?
Mrs. Potter: What for?
Fred Garvin: Well, ma'am, you see, when a VP like yourself comes to Milain to do business, it's customary for the company to send a gal up to the room, compliments of Great Lakes Feed & Grain. And, well.. since you're a gal, the company sent me - Fred Garvin, Male Prostitute.
[ Fred stares at the camera as the title card appears ]
Mrs. Potter: Uh.. I don't, I don't think you understand, Fred. I'm not that kind of girl..
Fred Garvin: Oh, let me reassure you, ma'am. I can assure you profssional hygeine, discretion and animal gratification.
Mrs. Potter: I have never had to pay for that in my whole life.
Fred Garvin: Well, don't worry about it. Great Lakes Feed & Grain is picking up the tab. You get me for the whole night!
Mrs. Potter: Hey, uh..
Fred Garvin: Hey is for horses, young lady. No ifs, ands or buts about it - you're spending the night with Fred Garvin, Male Prostitute.
[ Fred stares at the camera as the title card appears ]
Well, now, I have a work order here which specifies that I am to roger you roundly 'til 6:15 tomorrow morning.
Mrs. Potter: Now, wait a minute.. wait a minute. Don't I get dome say in this? I mean, maybe I want some sleep. Maybe I don't want to be rogered roundly.
Fred Garvin: Ma'am, you're dealing here with a fully qualified male strumpet. I service the entire quad cities area - Moline, Rock Island, Davenport and Bettendorf. Why don't you give it a whirl? What have you got to lose?
Mrs. Potter: [ walks aside to think to herself ] What do I have to lose? No one's ever gonna know.. and I'm not gonna see Paul for another couple of weeks. Sure, Fred's not the most attractive guy in the world.. but if he makes a living at this, he must be doing something right. [ finished thinking ] Okay, Mr. Garvin. I'll try it.
Fred Garvin: Congratulations, Mrs. Potter! I knew you'd come to your sense. And, ma'am, if you're amenable, I'd like to begin the session by striking a few.. seductive poses. [ makes series of odd, comic poses ]
Mrs. Potter: That's nice..
Fred Garvin: I call this one "The Snake". [ poses like a snake ]
Mrs. Potter: Uh.. well, I'm, uh..
Fred Garvin: Mrs. Potter, please cooperate. Come on, now, come on. You'll thank yourself later, now come on. Get on under this bed here, young lady, come on, come on. Just jump right on in here.
Mrs. Potter: Okay. [ jumps in ]
Fred Garvin: Now, if you don't mind, I do work with the glasses and jacket. [ climbs in ] Feeling anything yet? Any symptoms of arousal?
Mrs. Potter: I don't think so.
Fred Garvin: Well, these things take time. Perhaps a bit of humor will break the ice. What's red and green, and goes like this? [ makes spinning motion ]
Mrs. Potter: I don't know.
Fred Garvin: A frog in a blender! There you go. And now, look at this. [ holds up card ]
Mrs. Potter: What's this?
Fred Garvin: My backseat driver's license! [ laughs ] Enough foreplay - let's get cracking. [ removes pants ]
Mrs. Potter: [ notices something ] Hey, wait a minute..
Fred Garvin: What?
Mrs. Potter: What is all that stuff?
Fred Garvin: Oh, uh.. that's my rather elaborate network of trusses. I will need your help with a couple of these. I got the old hernia truss here.. and I got a spleen truss, it opens up with a couple of snaps here in the back..
Mrs. Potter: No, I don't think so.. you know, I.. I.. I think this is a little too much for me, I, uh..
Fred Garvin: No, no.. it's just a couple of snaps in the back. You know, you just gotta make sure you don't touch the rupture, that's all..
[ a knock at the door ]
Mrs. Potter: Who's that? Who's that?
Slick: It's Slick.
Mrs. Potter: Who's Slick?
Fred Garvin: Uh.. Slick. This takes a little explanation. You see.. Slick is a gentleman of leisure. He looks out for me and the girls. Uh.. be there in a jiffy, Slick! By the way, one good word from you would really put me in good with the boss.
Mrs. Potter: Okay.
Fred Garvin: [ opens door ] Hey, Slick!
Slick: [ enters, dressed a pimp ] There's my main man! I was down in the hallway, I thought you mind need some help with your trusses, baby.
Mrs. Potter: Oh, no, we don't need any help with his trusses. In fact, I think maybe you'd both better get out of here.
Slick: What's the matter, Miss? Hasn't Fred attended to your needs?
Mrs. Potter: Oh, no.. he's really attended to my needs.. [ Fred signals her ] He was wonderful! The earth moved! In fact, it moved so muich, I don't think I can take any more!
Slick: [ laughs ] That's my Fred! Yeah. He's my bread-and-butter man. You see, in my schedule I got eight girls, and Fred. Come on, Fred, let's go, man. They got some hungry women in Beddendorf waiting for the Garden Lizard.
Mrs. Potter: Fred? Fred? Fred, I just want to thank you for tonight. I'm never going to forget it.
Fred Garvin: Well, thank you, ma'am. I do what I can. Because I'm Fred Garvin, Male Prostitute.
[ Fred stares at the camera as the title card appears ]
[ fade to black ]
Job opportunities for Americans?
Better think twice when ordering Peking Duck in China next time.
AFRAC!
Read up on the results of China's forced abortion and infanticide "policies". The resultant lack of young females has caused a huge imbalance in China.
These "Desperate Housewives" may be the only chance these young men have.
lol!
Judas Priest! I'm 2 hrs from the Quad Cities. I will drive 3 hrs out of my way to totally avoid it.
Didn't you spend some time on Welch Ave? Maybe a little too much time.
That's just SICK!
in a humerous sort of way
"I'm down with you on that. Did the story ever mention what the bill was?"
Is that the duck bill?
Not true,
often the converse....
Just because a women is attractive doesn't mean that the men in her life are good lovers. Often the contrary, they think
it's a given (so to speak). So a woman has to be a bit more selective and even aggressive in her choices.
Free sex for a woman= bad sex.
Gigilo sex for a woman= good sex.
Consumer service is what it's all about ;)
Nothing specific on the bill, except that it was a poultry sum...
A movie we will see next year is
Deuce Bigelow: Chinese Gigolo
How do you pay? Put it on his bill?
20 dallahs, he love you long time.
that gives putting all your ducks in a row a new meaning, what doe this helen thomas look like
"These stories just quack me up."
Wonder how a guy can contact their organization?
I see no Local Union Hall telephone #.Wonder if you HAVE TO do the spiked hair thing?(I could wear a toupe' you know).Somebody GET me a number PLEASE!!!!
It's an old canard.
If you dont know ,you dont want to know.
It can only make you ill.
lets just say if all women looked like Helen Thomas we would all be queer.
Now you know where to look if you went to China with your wife and she got suddenly missing.
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