School can't locate Churchill's thesis: UI officials not sure master's paper was required

Rocky Mountain News ^ | 2/23/05 | Berny Morson

[tumblindice]

Might try looking for it in the "social security lockbox". Believe the box is on the top shelf of the main Senate cloakroom, next to Bobbie Byrd's bottle of 'Rebel Yell'.
Hillary's thesis--reputed to make Marx & Lenin seem like Rotarians--might be there as well.

[FormerACLUmember]

Wow, where do I apply for admission to the University of Colorado? This is a TOP school, with renowned scholars as faculty.

[Old Professer]

I ran this gibberish through my Language Logic Machine and it returned this:

"Especially qualified students, necessary to the cultural balance of a progressive university will receive grades equal to the higher-performing students until such time as they become embarrassing."

[Patinator]

Things to do today at work:
1. Throw all resumes from University of Colorado graduates in the trash.

2. Do the same for University of Illinois graduates


Are you hiring? Here is my background (no joke):

1) Undergrad degree in Finance from CU
2) MBA from U of I (Champain-Urbana)
3) 11 years experience as a little Eichman

[Muleteam1]

>>I, personally, am taking the full 2 1/2 years to complete mine. I guess I'm a slacker. LOL<<

I ceratinly wouold not call you a slacker. I graduated first in 1977 and again in 1980 so it took me almost three years to finish an MS. However, I also had both teaching and a research assistantships, and was driving a semi-truck during my graduate days. No time for fraternities or even coffee at the student union. And someone was talking on FR about the "good old days" recently? No way!

Muleteam1

[newzjunkey]

I wouldn't make that much of it. First off, "department head" could just mean the guy who missed the most faculty meetings (I heard that from an actual dept. head) and may well be rotated among the faculty.

[Billthedrill]

Well, heck - I'm gonna design my own Master's program in FReepology. Dunno about an oral exam but it's gonna involve beer.

Heck, why stop there? William T. Drill, PhD, Professor of FReepology at Punxatawny State. If I claim to be an oppressed enough minority mebbe I can even git me tenure. I bet you guys didn't know I'm 1/16 Mayan on my stepfather's side. You lesser mortals may kiss the ring...

[TomGuy]

Your college degree measures a standard 11" X 8.5", is printed on
high quality 60lb parchment paper, features an embossed gold foil seal, and
is suitable for framing. Shipped unfolded in a document mailer, your
degree is only $49.95 (U.S. dollars) AND INCLUDES FREE PRIORITY SHIPPING
within the continental USA. $59.95 overseas and includes free shipping.

Sorry, personal checks, and are not accepted. Shipping Overseas: Includes Canada. "Includes Free" 4-10 Day Shipping on International Orders for only $59.95.

[Real Cynic No More]

I graduated with a bachelor of science degree in 1971. At that time, I recall that to get a master's degree one could take a minimum no. of hours an write a thesis, or opt out of the thesis by taking additional coursework. However, a PhD required a thesis. Churchill warrants criticism, but the facts need to be correct.

[roses of sharon]

Absolutely, and with Summers, his faculty simply cannot stand an adult in charge.

They are incapable of living in the real world.

[tumblindice]

Something else I just noticed on the resume: look at his 'Military record'. Part of it is smudged but I can make out "Public Information Specialist" (sounds like: 'domestic engineer') and that he wrote news releases.
I thought "Chief" claimed a lot of 'trigger-time' in the bush, back in the `Nam, know what I mean? But looks like he's just another forked-tongue, REMFing Remington Raider.
What a surprise.

[rhetorica]

I completed my Master's degree in a little over a year. Of course that last semester was spent writing my Thesis...

I taught at a large University for many years with an MA program in Communication. We had a thesis and a non-thesis option. We encouraged students who wanted to pursue academic careers to write a thesis and students who wanted to be practitioners to do non-thesis.

With a Ph.D. I wasn't going to get tenure at the University because I spent too much of my time out in the world (e.g. consulting). So I am now consulting full time and making much more $$$$$! I teach part time just because I like to teach, but the rules on tenure are very different for Churchill apparently.

[justshutupandtakeit]

Sangamon State is one step above a junior college and probably not as good as many of them.

[TomGuy]

>>A Master's degree in only one year?<<

Impossible! Especially a non-thesis masters.

Actually, it is possible, if one attends a school that has a full summer session. A non-thesis masters is usually 36 semester hours, so it is doable.

[Alberta's Child]

Do you have any kind of civil engineering experience in your background? LOL.

At the University of Colorado, it would seem that a nice guy who drive a train would qualify as a "civil engineer."

[Lee Heggy]

One sure fire way he'll get axed no matter tenure or anything else is if he has ever messed around with a student. Want to bet that he hasn't or isn't doing so now? He certainly looks to be the type. I'll just wait for that shoe to drop.

[freespirited]

quite often the neer-do-well sons and daughters of the rich major in these programs. they graduate, and like a los angeles times article showed, the parents give them a credit card to go protest the wto. the times had an excellent in-depth study of these people at the seattle wto protest, was that 1999? i forget.

Yep, 1999. Did you see Churchill's contribution? He and a few other radical professors put out a statement objecting to the nonviolent protest philosophy.

http://www.urban75.com/Action/seattle8.html

Maybe I should put this on its own thread.

[kellynla]

Phd must stand for "Piled High and Deep"
I like that! LMAO

[Alberta's Child]

In my MS program in civil engineering students had to complete either a master's thesis or a design project. The thesis was definitely the more rigorous route by academic standards, but those of us who completed the design project were far more likely to pass our state professional engineering (P.E.) licensing examinations after graduation.

[justshutupandtakeit]

Sangamon State is not the equivalent of UoI major campi at Urbana and Chicago both of which are schools far better than U of Colorado. SS is not even in the top 50 colleges in Illinois.