Posted on 10/30/2018 4:58:20 AM PDT by sodpoodle
A couple was invited to a swanky costume party. The Mrs. got a terrible headache and told her husband to go to the party alone.
He being a devoted husband protested, but she argued and said she was going to take some aspirin and go to bed and there was no need for his good time being spoiled by not going. So he took his costume and away he went.
wife, after sleeping soundly for about an hour, awakened without pain and, as it was still early, decided to go the party.
Since her husband did not know what her costume was, she thought she would have some fun by watching her husband to see how he acted when she was not with him.
She joined the party and soon spotted her husband cavorting around on the dance floor, dancing with every nice looking woman he could, and copping a little feel here and a little kiss there.
His wife sidled up to him and being a rather seductive babe herself, he left his current partner high and dry and devoted his time to the new babe that had just arrived. She let him go as far as he wished naturally, since he was her husband.
Finally, he whispered a little proposition in her ear and she agreed.
So off they went to one of the cars and had a quickie. Just before unmasking at midnight , she slipped away, went home, put the costume away and got into bed, wondering what kind of explanation he would make for his behavior.
She was sitting up reading when he came in, and she asked what kind of a time he had..
He said: 'Oh, the same old thing. You know I never have a good time when you're not there.
'Did you dance much ?'
“I'll tell you, I never even danced one dance. When I got there, I met Pete , Bill Brown and some other guys and we went into the den and played poker all evening…”
“But you're not going to believe what happened to the guy I loaned my costume to.....”
That is great, made me laugh out loud!!!!
Oh no.
oh my
He approaches a house in his neighborhood as his Mom watches from the sidewalk. An older woman answers the door and exclaims, "Oh My! What a fearsome looking pirate!"
She looks out the door to the left and right then asks, "But where are your Buccaneers?"
Without missing a beat, the kid lifts his hat and retorts, "Under me bucking hat, lady."
I needed money to get a Halloween costume. I said, “ hey pops, can you give me money to buy a costume?”
He looked at me and said, “You don’t need money, just put some jockey shorts on your head, and you can be an ass!”
Rodney Dangerfield
That is a KEEPER!!!!!!
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