Posted on 12/10/2017 10:12:04 AM PST by Lazamataz
I was attacked by a mouse once. Better than a moose I guess. I had to get a tetanus shot. I thought it was rabid but the doctor said that was unlikely.
TORA TORA TORA
“They will go pretty far inland, too, and hang around fast-food parking lots.”
We live 200 miles inland from the NC coast and we see gulls all the time around here. I used to kid my wife that, because of global warming, they were scouting the area for the best oceanfront nesting areas after the seas rise.
When i 15 i was making out with a girl on the beach, at The Santa Cruz Beach Boardwalk.
Things were hot and heavy and she decides to take my mind off a rising situation, suggesting we eat some fried artichoke hearts.
So, she rolls off me and just as she walks away an Effin seagull unloaded right on my chest.
Well, I was missed off and grossed out.
Problem solved, she laughingly used our towel to clean me up.
May as well have dropped me into fat of ice cubes and water.
Problem solved....for a while.
Made it to the car where we got something straight between us...
I swear, I’d still like to kill that Jonathan Livingston Seagull bass tarde and it’s been 40 years....
How would anyone know know? A Grade School girl’s Juvenile records would be sealed!
Good theory!
I do a seagull call and lots come and I feed them cheese nips. They love them. They fly all around me peacefully grabbing up the nips. It makes me feel like I am in the middle of one of those globes with snow falling around me, but instead of snow it is gulls. It’s a fun experience!
Please don’t use “hot” and “snatch” in the same sentence!
Okay...how’s about Hammer and chest nuts?
Why oh why must you taunt me so?
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