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- Location: kenosha
- it's ok to contact this poster with services or other commercial interests
Posted on 07/18/2017 3:21:58 PM PDT by Eagles Field
For sale: one early 80’s Craftsman riding lawn mower with an 11 horse power engine and 30″ mowing deck. Bottom line, this beast is a sick ride! In fact, I’d even say it’s the El Camino of yard whips. Just take a look at those sweet ass rims. So dope they look rented. #arethosedubs?
Wait, is that a chicken in the background? Damn straight! Because the Craftsman riding lawn mower was considered the barnyard pimp of its day. Get yer yerrd on, fool!
Is it fast? Ever heard of old school 3 on the tree? Well, this whip’s got 8 on the hip. That’s right, 8 screamin’ gears of merciless speed! Need to mow that $h!t Richard petty style? No problem. Snappin’ necks and mowin’ decks, homie…
Just look at this beast. It even has the original factory pin striping. This NASCAR style speed demon will look quick just sitting in your driveway. Neighbors be like “SMH with envy.” Don’t dare put this baby in the shed. She deserves the garage. #nooneputsbabyinthecorner
Does it run, you ask? HELLS YEAH! Like a pack of Kenyans on crystal meth! This bad boy just got a carburetor rebuild, new seals all the way around and a brand new battery installed. Turns over quicker than your prom date. And you don’t even need to buy it wine coolers.
Don’t get me started on the mowing deck! 30 full inches of precision slicin’ and dicin’. Cuts better than Edward Scissor Hands and Lorena Bobbit in a knife fight. And this blade runner has 8 cutting heights! Go full Brazilian with a 1 inch cut, or bring your field of dreams up to 8 inches, 1970’s style; your choice. All I’m sayin’ is this mo-fo fades a lawn better than a set of hair clippers at Fantastic Sams. Whaaaa?
But can I mow with it at night, you ask? Who hasn’t awoken at O’dark:30 to mow their lawn black ops style? No problem with this night rider. It has a fully functioning head light, Michael. #Getyerdarkon
Pretty sure this man-ride is the luxury model. It’s equipped with a plush pleather spring ride seat for those Brokeback yards, 10 inch Kung Fu grip steering wheel and rubberized foot pads. Ain’t no footloose goin’ on up in here. Safety first, homies!
You: So how much is this Kentucky bluegrass love machine? Me: Just $500.°°. You: Wait, what? Me: That’s right, you heard me, only $500 greenbacks. The world: How is that possible? Me: my family and I have enjoyed using this cutting-deck of dope-ness since it’s immaculate inception back in the 80’s. Can you say one owner? Yup!
It’s time this black pearl set sail and find another crew to roll with. It’s faded many lawns in its day and is looking for the greener grass on your side of the fence.
Don’t wait to call or you’ll be tellin’ stories about the one that got away for the rest of your life, or call me now and become the lawn jockey you always dreamed to be.
No texts, please. I need to hear your voice and know that this family pet is going to a 100% full blooded american. #Merica
Link?
TTIUWOP
ROTFLMAO!!!!
Like a pack of Kenyans on crystal meth!
LOL!
“Turns over quicker than your prom date. And you don’t even need to buy it wine coolers.”
Saving for my kid!
I saw a CL tag ad last week that said *DIVORCE SALE*
Cracked me up; pix where piles and piles of guy stuff.
To say *she* is bitter.....puts it mildly.
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I saw a ‘trading post’ ad one time selling a tacky sofa. “Husband included.”
Hubby was passed out on said sofa with a cooler open and a depleted 6-pack inside.
classic.
ROTFLMTO
Cuts better than Edward Scissor Hands and Lorena Bobbit in a knife fight.
I can’t breathe!!!!
Only 11 horsepower?
Paint it pink and put some Barbie stickers on it.
Then you might sell it.
Until EPA regulations caused a switch to overhead valves, many lawn mower engines were flatheads. These have lower compression and are easier to start. This is why you can start antique cars/tractors with a hand crank.
I'm not sure the guy is serious about selling as the $500 asking price is an outrage. Similar lawn mowers are usually given away or sold for a nominal fee.
No, don’t tell me, your handle is “buzzkill” amiright ?!
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RE: Engine turns over quicker than a prom date
Until EPA regulations caused a switch to overhead valves, many lawn mower engines were flatheads. These have lower compression and are easier to start. This is why you can start antique cars/tractors with a hand crank.
I’m not sure the guy is serious about selling as the $500 asking price is an outrage. Similar lawn mowers are usually given away or sold for a nominal fee.
It appears the original ad has expired, but here is a website that has saved the ad and the photos (which are shamelessly ripped off and posted below:)
Not much of a lawn underneath the mower.
Where did they put 11 HP?
Is that a stretch ?
Looks like Fl.
I used to say the state flower was a SandSpur.
‘Go full Brazilian...’ ROTFLMAO!
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