NFL Schedule - 2014 [Live Thread Week 17]

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[Bender2]

Week 17

Sunday, Dec. 28

Carolina Panthers vs. Atlanta Falcons, 1 p.m.

Cleveland Browns vs. Baltimore Ravens, 1 p.m.

Detroit Lions vs. Green Bay Packers, 1 p.m.

Jacksonville Jaguars vs. Houston Texans, 1 p.m.

San Diego Chargers vs. Kansas City Chiefs, 1 p.m.

New York Jets vs. Miami Dolphins, 1 p.m.

Chicago Bears vs. Minnesota Vikings, 1 p.m.

Buffalo Bills vs. New England Patriots, 1 p.m.

Philadelphia Eagles vs. New York Giants, 1 p.m.

Cincinnati Bengals vs. Pittsburgh Steelers, 1 p.m.

New Orleans Saints vs. Tampa Bay Buccaneers, 1 p.m.

Indianapolis Colts vs. Tennessee Titans, 1 p.m.

Dallas Cowboys vs. Washington Redskins, 1 p.m.

Oakland Raiders vs. Denver Broncos, 4:25 p.m.

Arizona Cardinals vs. San Francisco 49ers, 4:25 p.m.

St. Louis Rams vs. Seattle Seahawks, 4 p.m.

[Bender2]

Gadzooks, campers-- It is Week 17, the last regular Sunday of NFL football action.

And even with my Boys in the playoffs, I am sad... that the season is over.

So, this final Sunday's regular action finds the Rebuilding since 1964 New Browns getting spanked by Crab City's Old Browns in hopes of my Old Dallas Texans beating the Bolts--

Sorry, big-- I'm pulling for the Lion Chops over your Pack here as I don't want another Ice Bowl in the future if things go as I hope--

Allegra's Texicans win over the Jags, giving her new hope for next season if they can find a friggin' quarterback!

My Old Dallas Texans discharge the Chargers as the Raven wish--

The 2nd Greatest Aggie NFL Quarterback gives Rex one final loss before he is fired as the Head Jersey Jet--

Da Bears, dead old Imp, get a win for you over the Viqueens--

Well, big, your resting Patty Cakes get skunked by the Bills--

Manning Lite has a ball putting the final nail in the Iggle's sorry season--

Cincy at the Stoolers, a useless game that nobody cares who wins--

Nawleans at Tampa, same song, second verse--

Young Lucky works out the kinks on Allegr's Old Earlers--

My Boys work up a sweat killing the Deadskins--

Cam leads his Putty Tats to a victory over the Black Byrds from Georgia--

Sorry, Seven-- Manning Heavy gets back in the saddle--

The Soapy 9ers give Jimbo a going away present and the Cards a headache--

The Ewes don't have a chinaman's chance against the Seahags-- Dangit!

Gadzooks, that's it, boys and girls... Now, get your picks in right away!

[Bender2]

Bendy says all of you better get your picks in... or we put the Fickle Finger here where the sun don't shine!

[Bender2]

from http://www.nfl.com/news/story/0ap3000000448100/article/who-can-clinch-a-playoff-spot-in-week-17

NFC

CLINCHED: Arizona Cardinals, Detroit Lions, Green Bay Packers, Dallas Cowboys, Seattle Seahawks

ELIMINATED: New York Giants, Washington Redskins, Chicago Bears, Tampa Bay Buccaneers, Minnesota Vikings, St. Louis Rams, San Francisco 49ers, New Orleans Saints, Philadelphia Eagles

The Cowboys clinch home-field advantage throughout NFC playoffs with: a win plus a Cardinals loss or tie and a Lions-Packers tie.

Dallas clinches a first-round bye with:
1) a win plus a Seahawks loss or tie plus a Cardinals loss or tie
2) a win plus a Lions-Packers tie
3) a tie plus a Seahawks loss and a Cardinals loss
4) a tie plus a Seahawks tie, a Cardinals loss or tie and Lions-Packers does not end in a tie

The Lions clinch the NFC North with: a win or a tie.

The Lions clinch home-field advantage with:
1) a win plus a Seahawks loss or tie and a Cardinals loss or tie
2) a tie plus a Seahawks loss, a Cardinals loss and a Cowboys loss or tie

The Lions clinch a first-round bye with:
1) a win
2) a tie plus a Cowboys loss or tie
3) a tie plus a Seahawks loss and a Cardinals loss

The Packers clinch the NFC North and a first-round bye with a win. They clinch home-field with: a win and a Seahawks loss or tie.

The Seahawks clinch the NFC West with:
1) a win
2) a tie plus a Cardinals loss or tie
3) a Cardinals loss

The Seahawks clinch home-field advantage with:
1) a win plus Lions-Packers game does not end in a tie
2) a win plus a Cowboys loss or tie
3) a tie plus a Cardinals loss or tie, a Cowboys loss and a Lions-Packers tie

The Seahawks clinch a first-round bye with:
1) a win
2) a tie plus a Cardinals loss or tie and a Cowboys loss
3) a tie plus a Cardinals loss or tie and a Lions-Packers tie

The Cardinals clinch NFC West with:
1) a win plus a Seahawks loss or tie
2) a tie plus a Seahawks loss

The Cardinals clinch home-field advantage with:
1) a win plus a Seahawks loss or tie and a Packers loss or tie
2) a tie plus a Seahawks loss, a Cowboys loss or tie and a Packers-Lions tie

The Cardinals clinch a first-round bye with:
1) a win plus a Seahawks loss or tie
2) a tie plus a Seahawks loss and a Cowboys loss or tie
3) a tie plus a Seahawks loss and a Lions-Packers tie

The Panthers clinch NFC South with win over Falcons.

The Falcons clinch NFC South with win over Panthers.
AFC

CLINCHED: New England Patriots (home-field advantage), Indianapolis Colts, Denver Broncos, Pittsburgh Steelers, Cincinnati Bengals

ELIMINATED: Oakland Raiders, Jacksonville Jaguars, Tennessee Titans, New York Jets, Cleveland Browns, Miami Dolphins, Buffalo Bills

Denver clinches a first-round bye with:
1) a win or tie
2) a Bengals loss
3) a Bengals tie plus Colts win

Bengals clinch AFC North with a win or tie in Week 17.

Cincinnati clinches first-round bye with:
1) a win plus a Broncos loss or tie
2) a tie plus a Broncos loss and a Colts loss or tie

Steelers clinch AFC North with win.

Chargers clinch playoff spot with:
1) a win
2) a tie plus a Ravens loss or tie

Ravens clinch playoff spot with:
1) a win plus a Chargers loss or tie
2) a tie plus a Chargers loss

The Chiefs clinch a playoff spot with: a win plus a Ravens loss and a Texans loss or tie.

The Texans clinch a playoff spot with: a win plus a Ravens loss and a Chargers loss.

[zeestephen]

At least 10 of the 16 games will have some impact on the playoffs.

Namely, home field, a bye week, or making the cut for the final 12.

Also, probably the last game for Jet's Head Coach Rex Ryan, also for the Jet's GM, also for Jim Harbaugh in San Francisco (which I still don't understand).

Miami is sticking with Coach Joe Philbin, which surprised a lot of us.

And, Miami QB Ryan Tannehill, after 3 years, has suddenly shown some consistency and a deep pass threat which has completely shocked many Miami fans. I think Tannehill might be in the top twelve QB’s now. Even a month ago, many Miami fans wondered if the Dolphins would just pay him $3.4 million in 2015 and let him walk away in 2016. It will cost $15 million guaranteed if they sign him for 2015 and 2016.

[Vinnie]

I think the Panther-Falcon game has moved to 4:00pm.
For drama I guess.

[MilesVeritatis]

Yep, two games moved in WEEK 17 via NFL Flex Scheduling:

CAR at ATL 4:25 p.m.

CIN at PIT 8:30 p.m.

[doosee]

You think the Cincy at PItt game is useless with no one caring...hardly, the NFL put it into the prime 830 slot to feature it nationally. Decides the division from which likely 3 teams enter the playoffs. Go Steelers of course.

[Ken H]

ELIMINATED: New York Giants, Washington Redskins, Chicago Bears,...

Chicago is out? Chicago is OUT!?!

[big'ol_freeper]

Well Bend, hard to believe it's week 17 but here we are.

The Pigeons over the Brownstains
In an upset, sorry Bend, the Redspuds over the Cowgirls
The Folds over the Titians
The Texians over the Jagwursts
Bender's old Dallas Texans over the Charredburgers
The Tunas over the Toe-suckers
The Vicekings over Impy's Bearlies
The AFC East Champion, Home-Field-Advantage-Holding
New England Patriots over the Bill-folds
The Midgets over the Eaglettes
The Ain'ts over the Pirates
The Dirty Birds over the Punters
The Reigning NFC North Champion
Green Bay Packers will hold their title
over Local Yokel's Detroitistan Loins and
take Home Field Advantage (see Seathugs below)
The Mules over Seven's Traitors
The Fluffy Niners over the Buzzards

Ok, ok I can't pick the Lambs over the Seathugs (dammit) so Seattle gains Home Field Advantage with a win over the Lambs......

But you never know what gifts Santa Homie might bring
und
The Stool Piles over the Bungles

So there you have it, the 2014 NFL season

[smoothsailing]

BOOM!!!

[Cletus.D.Yokel]

Merry Christmas, Bendy!

You picked the Loins over the Pack...in GB...in December? Lordy, I’m feeling all flush with pride (wait, that could be a side-effect of my Cialis).

But, I can’t, even though I am a rigid Loins fan.
Pack by 10 on The Tundra.

[Bender2]

Re: So there you have it... the 2014 NFL season

Well, big, I sent your first born ... what he asked... for--

And I see it did not go over... well--

[eldoradude]

Merry Christmas Bending Unit #2!

Yes, Cowpokes rope up some abos - then give Romo a rest.

I'd like to see a Dah-less vs Bah-stoned Stuporbowl.

That Wilson kid in C@et al does run a lot, shame if he got banged up.

[Bender2]

Just want to take a moment to say goodbye to my old Number One Fishing & Hunting Buddy and 2nd-to-none cousin Louis Gene Eppler

He passed away after a long dark period and I wish to remember him as he was as a true flower of youth in the 1950s

Go gentle into that good night, Louis. We'll always recall you... as you were--

[lysie]

Prayers up for family and friends.

[lwd]

HOU

IND

BAL

NE

NYJ?

CAR!!

MIN

KC

NYG

DAL

TB lol

GB

SEA

SF

DEN

CIN

[SevenofNine]

Yeah hate to agree Still Oakland Raiders are going get beaten up by Manning dude is coming back in 2015

[nascarnation]

What does that gesture mean?
I always thought it meant a defensive player was successful in stopping a play.
But obviously Bryant scored a TD.

[SunkenCiv]

> I’m pulling for the Lion Chops over your Pack here...

Here too. :’)

[lwd]

I have no idea honesty...just thought the shirt was funny.