Grandparents

[Allen In Texas Hill Country]

The wife and I have an ongoing disagreement about the legal rights of grandparents. I know the internet is not necessarily the right place to go to ask/get legal opinions but this is FR and I believe every thing I read here.(/sarc)

Can the parents (of sound mind) prevent garandparents (of sound mind) from seeing underage grandchildren? I say absolutely and she says grandparents have a legal right to see their grandchildren. Can anybody safely shed a bit of light here? Thanks.

[Mr. K]

The parents can keep them away, but the deeper question is why?

[RebelTXRose]

It is sad, but, yes, grandparents can be kept from their grandchildren. SOME states (Texas is NOT one of them) allow grandparents visitation rights. Family IS important!

[Casie]

Nah. You are the legal guardians of a minor. You are free to limit extended family's access to your kids.

[Dan(9698)]

If your family is so dysfunctional that your kids don't want you to visit your grand kids, there are more problems than can be addressed on freerepublic.

[Behind the Blue Wall]

I’m fairly certain that whatever rights the grandparents might have are trumped by the parents’ rights.

[cuban leaf]

Ask it in a different way and the answer is obvious: Do parents have the God given right to choose who their minor children come into contact with?

[Pollster1]

I vaguely recall a legal case in which grandparents sued for the right to see their grandchildren, in an intact marriage, and won. I know that, as a parent, I would take extreme offense at any such demand and would work to circumvent or subvert any such court order. Additional information.

[mnehring]

Straight from the source.
https://www.oag.state.tx.us/elder/grandparents.shtml

[Persevero]

“It is sad, but, yes, grandparents can be kept from their grandchildren.”

I don’t think it’s sad. We can’t have the state dictating to parents who their children may see and not see.

If there is severe, proven abuse or neglect by a parent(s), they can lose their parental rights. Then the state takes over, and they can decide all manner of things for the kids.

If that isn’t the case, the parents will decide. I am certain no parent makes the right decision at all times. I know I haven’t. But we can’t have the government come in and start legislating relationships. That is not their role.

[afraidfortherepublic]

I think the answer differs from state to state. I know of many court cases that have been fought about this.

[Scoutmaster]

It differs by state. I dont see Texas on the list of states giving some form of visitation rights. Did you ever serve as de facto parents, with the children living alone with you?

[svcw]

There may be some states which allow grandparents rights, I know of none.
A friend of mine sued in California to see her grandchildren, and the court said no.

[Venturer]

Grandparents have no rights at all.

I tried to get heard at the custody hearing of my Grand daughter and the Judge acted like I wasn’t alive.

[Persevero]

Exactly, Pollster. What if I am a Christian and the grandparents like to insinuate that Christianity is for dummies?

Or if I forbid swearing and the grandparents insist on it around the kids?

What if I ban sugar and the GPs like to sneak cookies? What if I am a conservative and the GPs like to have my kids listen to NPR??

What if I am concerned that the GPs are fishing for lies to accuse me with and make me lose custody of the kids? They can’t assert any sort of abuse or neglect if they have no interaction with them.

What if the GPs had a history of abuse of me or others? What if they were never convicted, but I knew it was true? What if I just suspected it?

What if some of my GPs friends give me the heebie jeebies and I worry that said friends are going to “come around” when my kids are there? What if I think their driving skills are really poor and I can’t trust them not to drive my kids places?

What if they watch questionable movies or tv shows I don’t want my kids to see? What if they are nudists? What if I am a teetotalar and they drink?

Etc.

You know, I’m the parent. The buck stops here. If I don’t think my kids are better off being with their GPs, I don’t. I should not have to so much as defend my reasons to any court.

[Allen In Texas Hill Country]

Its not “our children don’t want us to see their kids”. A bit more complex than that, sorry. And the the grandkid is in Alabama. The wife and I always have spirited, but calm, disagreements and its looks like I won this debate. Unfortunately :<((((((

Thanks all for the responses.

[Casie]

I agree with you completely. What a bad decision to over-ride a parent's rights. My Dad protected us completely from his family. We grew up spoiled and happy and blissfully ignorant of subjects like alcoholism, domestic violence and crime. Besides, we had amazing grandparents and extended family on Mom's side so we hardly noticed the absence of Dad's people until we were old enough to really understand.

[Lurking Libertarian]

I think the answer differs from state to state.

Very true. One of the many reasons why asking for legal advice online is not a great idea.

[longfellowsmuse]

I agree with you. If grandparents want to foster meaningful relationships with their grandchildren the best way is to have a healthy relationship with the childrens’ parents.

If a grandparent needs a court order to see grandchildren than that extended relationship is dysfunctional to begin with and probably not in the best interest of the children. Barring abuse and neglect ( by legal standards not the grandparents) grandparents shouldn’t have the legal right to interfere in parental decisions just because they would do things differently. JMO.

[KosmicKitty]

I believe it depends on the state

In Connecticut, grandparents have legal rights for visitation

In New York, they do not.

(Personal experience, not a lawyer)