Skip to comments.UK: A THIRD of young women admit regrets about the way they lost their virginity (ruined love lives)
Posted on 08/01/2012 1:23:35 PM PDT by a fool in paradise
...feeling the pressure to conform, Kristen gave in to her 16-year-old boyfriend Carls continual pestering for sex when her parents were out at work one day.
She... anticipated a romantic encounter. But the harsh reality was that losing her virginity so early turned out to be one of the worst experiences of Kristens life.
It has also had lasting repercussions, since she is convinced that having sex at such a young age made her far more promiscuous in later years than she otherwise might have been.
We had sex on the bathroom floor because it was the only room with a lock, she says. It all felt so seedy that I regretted it immediately.
Kristens regrets were magnified by the fact that Carl who had used contraception was uncaring and cold towards her as soon as they had sex, and left the house immediately afterwards.
Things went from bad to worse when Kristen confided in her friends that she had finally joined their club, only for them to admit they had been lying and were, in fact, still virgins.
Then Carl denied that wed had sex, she says. His friends were teasing him and I think he was ashamed to be associated with me, which hurt. For months, I dreaded going to school. I hated seeing Carl and worried that everyone thought I was a liar or a slut.
...Her story can only fuel concerns about the lasting damage on todays younger generation who see having sex under the legal age of consent of 16 as all too normal.
In fact, becoming sexually active at an early age can have devastating lifelong consequences, according to clinical psychologist Dr Michael Mantell. Its a psychological disaster waiting to happen, he says. It leads to empty relationships and low self-worth.
(Excerpt) Read more at dailymail.co.uk ...
Sex on the bathroom floor?
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You mean teen sex is not what Hollywood has made it out to be??? Get out!
Free love isn’t free.
But international advocates of the Socialist sex positive agenda, the United Nations, psychologists, and state run hospitals all advocate for it in public schools and hospitals. Often with our tax dollars.
< reality >Another reason to reconsider our harsh Victorian attitude towards professional sex consultants. In civilized times, pre - 1920’s, a man-boy could seek professional help in satisfying curiosity. < /reality >
There are plenty of detractors posting in the comments on the original UK article. Must be looking for fresh victims. Some also lash out at the institution of marriage.
Post-modernism died on 9-11-2001 but some people seem to have forgotten.
The culture has jumped the shark. Idiocracy is here.
I take your point about brothels in early 20th century America. But a lot of those boys picked up “a dose” and then passed it on to their wives once they married.
In all fairness, a distinction should be made between how a woman loses her hymen and her virginity.
In primitive cultures, though naturally about a quarter of women do not significantly bleed when their hymen is torn, many women have been beaten or killed because of it. Likewise when girls are athletic and do stretching or gymnastics, they often lose their hymen without sex.
And today, because of better nutrition, many women have a hymen that cannot be torn by sex, and for her safety and to prevent a dangerous infection, it needs to be surgically torn.
So it is best to think of the hymen in terms of an extra measure to reduce infection for girls, that has little or no bearing in the retention or loss of virginity.
As far as that goes, I am a strong believer in the southern American custom called “necking”. It was an unusually effective means of determining compatibility beyond any doubt. It involved a “slightly chaperoned” situation of a couple sitting on a comfortable couch or sofa and kissing, just kissing, for an hour. Nothing more.
It was discovered that if two people are not compatible, kissing more than 10 minutes is just painfully uncomfortable. They no longer want to kiss or even touch, and there is mutual certainty that they do not want to get married.
But if they could kiss for an hour and still like each other, it was very likely that they could get married and remain married. Because kissing is so intimate, they would be pretty certain that sex would be good, even before they had it.
So the loss of virginity on the wedding night would be far less uncomfortable or embarrassing, and remembered as a pleasant and romantic encounter.
I know Glee is nnot a great example, but I did like that when main character Rachel was asking the other girls about whether she should sleep with her boyfriend, all but one girl told her to wait and not do it.
I recall a Medieval story about an Italian widow and her daughter.
She maintained a strict and chaste household to ensure that her reputation, and the reputation of her daughter was unassailable. And when the time came for her daughter to marry - she made her a good match to a handsome and wealthy young man.
After the wedding and the wedding night it was customary for the groom to prepare the house for his new bride and then to take her from her family home. When time passed and he didn’t call for his bride, she invited him over to discuss the matter.
He said that he knew the common talk about the house of a widow - but thought nothing of it because of her fine reputation - but when he took his wife to bed she seemed too enthusiastic to be a virgin.
She took him out to the barn and grabbed up a young duckling just hatched and threw it into the water. It swam perfectly well. She told him that nature was strong and that his wife’s appreciation for a young handsome husband was not to be despised.
He took the lesson well and called for his wife to join him in his home.
The lesson? - a young bride with a handsome husband can very well take to sex like a duck to water. ;)
Yes, but all too often it descends into farce, for example alum Sitz baths, and in modern times, hymen restoration plastic surgery, “hymenorrhaphy”. It is also known as hymenoplasty, although strictly this term would also include hymenotomy.
I remember one medical tale of an elderly woman in South America who needed surgery that would destroy her hymen, and she refused, until she got a note from her doctor, that was the equivalent of notarized by a local government official. Her intent was that when she died, the note would be put into her coffin, with the idea that she would present it to St. Peter, as proof that she had died a virgin.
http://articles.nydailynews.com/2010-06-03/entertainment/27066190_1_teen-girls-teen-attitudes-teens-ages This article claims 40% of teens 15-19 have had sex at least once. If most of those who regret their first time were teens, this suggests that the vast majority of teens who have sex regret it (even the boys). Who would have guessed - other than our religious leaders, our parents, conservative leaders, Sarah and Bristol Palin, and just about everyone else with common sense. Perhaps teaching “sex ed” from a “they’re going to do it so let’s hand out condoms” perspective is not the best option for our kids. How unexpected!
Notice although her friends pretended they were faddish, and Leftists made sex out to be an inconsequential every day event like eating lunch, the poor kid fell for the big lie and hurt herself.
God bless her.
I shall also note that the BOYS are not to be absolved of responsibility for their actions either. Too bad this girl didn’t have a big brother or male cousin she felt comfortable to call on for a little chat with Carlie.
Not a young maiden's dream in other words.
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