Posted on 07/27/2012 5:38:33 PM PDT by mamelukesabre
Up to the time her illness was discovered, I was planning to divorce attributing her behavior to character, attitude or whatever. Once we found out there was a real pathology possibly causing it all, I put all hostility behind.
I am really sorry for the tough stuff you’re going through with your parents, and you have a right to be very concerned.
Now...on the other hand...
If you could only have seen what you wrote through the cinema screen on MY eye lids, you’d be laughing your a$$ off at the comedy of the non-emotional elements of the entire story.
That’s definitely a table story with the kids lol!
I had a dog much like yours and I’ve chased him down the road on more than one occasion as he slipped on by, and hot footed it after a canine trespasser. All he really wanted to do was nip the pooch on the shoulder as discipline. Wait a minute and he’d come prancing back, proudly displaying his new found friend.
The dog across the street however, (a different dog) was a wolf/akita combo who was actually my dog’s best friend. My dog would actually sit there and CALL that wolf to come over and play!
I tell you that because those are super smart dogs and you might actually be able to work with that dog since the neighbor is so lax..and diffuse the situation between the dogs.
It doesn’t do much for mom’s snarly temper, but more often than not, dogs are more agreeable than people are anyway!
You didn’t want advice, but you got it anyway lol!
Best of luck to you with both situations, and I’m very glad nobody got hurt in the scuffle.
Otherwise think about assisted living if they have the money.
My prayers are with you. It is a very difficult situation you are in. Being the “parent” with a parent is a nitemare frought with frustration cause they don’t want to be “parented”.
Its easy for people to say”JUst stay calm and try to keep control” but its is very, very , very hard.
If at all possible my only advice, if it is at all possible, talk with your dad’s doctor. Perhaps some mild medication might also help your mother calm the fears she has.
The other possibility which one adult son I know did was to get a counselor he knew to meet a few times with his father ( situation was reversed) so that his father had someone that wasn’t family to vent to and offer a little coping strategies to his father.
In any case, know that you are a good son for being there for your parents through this difficult time.
You said no advice, but my FRiend, you’re gonna get some. You WILL thank me for it later.
Do NOT...whatever you do...do NOT move in with your parents or have them move in with you. Your life will be a living hell. Let her boss dad around; from what you say he doesn’t really give a damn (I’m sorry; I truly don’t mean to sound cold to his condition, God bless him).
She’ll never willingly give you power of attorney or power of anything else. Let it run its course. It will be hard, and it will frustrate you to no end.....but please trust me.
Don’t do it. You have a life to live.
I am sorry this is happening to your family. Take care of them the best you can, then have no regrets because you cannot change who they are.
The way I handle stuff like this is just remember at least you have a slightly funny awful situation.
If your parents were shot but not dead in a theatre, you’d have a non-funny awful situation.
Perspective, man. It could be a lot worse.
A massive downburst weakened 4 huge trees in my yard and one fell on my pier and beam house. It’s like living on the Titanic until my landlord gets this thing cut. But there are people surfacing in the lake that the downburst ended, not just inconvenienced. Perspective.
I wrote the most valuable scribe that would have cured your problem in seconds...
Then I remembered your Title....
So I erased the most concise piece of brilliance I’ve ever written!!!
For his mother??
That seems to be the main subject.
As soon as you charge after your dog, she thinks you are there to back her up. Otherwise, I think you dog would not have gone outside of your property to go after the wolf dog. What happened next could only be described as chaos.
If it is not this incident, there will be other event(s) that would trigger something between you and your mother. Find sometime when both of you are calm, (i.e., watch some tv comedy show or movie that you both enjoy), then try to talk it out.
My dog gutted a schnauzer once. That’s why I got her free...many years ago. I’m the third owner and I got her just before her second birthday. She wupped a blue heeler every day for a month before gutting the schnauzer. Blue heelers are not weak and this one outweighed her by maybe 5 lbs. No little nip to the shoulder I promise. And no friends afterwards. I took her because I know how to control a dog like that. You have to be tougher than the dog. I’m proud to say my dog has never harmed another dog as long as i’ve owned her. there have been close calls though.
Good point. Of all the triggering events he was bound to get one way or another, this was the best and least-destructive one.
My husband passed away in Feb. from Alzheimer’s, so I understand what you are going through. I also understand that all dementia situations are different, so won’t advise you on how to react. However, your mother might be reacting to medications, particularly different types of heart meds. If she is on any kind of medication, google it or ask a doctor. If you can ‘fix’ her, she might be able to help with him. Good luck, and prayers your way.
piss off
You sound to me like someone who knows what to do when challenges present themselves and who learns from them.
So you don’t want advice or support, you just want to start a fight.
Prayers your way...sorry!
agree
The neighbor saved the day. I’m so glad I did not have to shoot the gun. That would’ve brought cops and the cops would’ve been VERY confused once my idiot mother started running her fool mouth off. who knows what would’ve happened after that.
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