So when does this guy have a feast day? I think it would make an excellent holiday here on freerepublic, the feast of st. Zoticus, Feeder of orphans, Zotter of dummies!
Zoticus (d.c. 350) + Priest and patron of the poor. Originally from Rome, he journeyed to Constantinople (modern Istanbul, Turkey) when it became the capital city of the Empire under Constantine the Great (r. 324-337). There he founded a hospital for the poor and defended orthodox Christianity before the pro-Arian emperor Constantius II (r. 641-668). Feast day: December 31.
St. Zoticus was of noble birth and wealthy. He gave up his position and wealth, was ordained to the priesthood and moved to Constantinople. Emperor Constantine supported his work among the poor, infirm and orphans. He organized and administered a large home for their care. After Constantine the Great’s repose, his son, Constantius, was jealous of the wealth that his father had given to the poor by Zoticus’ hand. Constantius tied St. Zoticus behind a wild ass which was driven through the streets until the aged Saint died of his wounds.
DRAGGED TO DEATH BY A DONKEY, ST ZOTICUS NOW GETS HIS ENJOYMENT OUT OF ZOTTING DU DONKEY TROLLS.