Posted on 07/02/2008 4:40:19 PM PDT by DemonDeac
"Congrats, newly minted NBA rookie!
Now you've been drafted. Next comes the delicious multimillion-dollar contract. And that's when you must do what most NBA players do: start going through cash like Jack Black through the Keebler factory."
"All kinds of athletes wind up with nothing but lint in their pockets. And if everyone from Johnny Unitas to Sheryl Swoopes to Lawrence Taylor can do it, so can you! With my How to Go Bankrupt* DVD series, it's a layup to go belly-up!"
"Ten essentials, just to get you started:"
"2). Buy a house the size of Delaware. Evander Holyfield was in danger of losing his 54,000-square-foot pad outside Atlanta, and it's a shame. He had almost visited all 109 rooms!"
3). Buy many, many cars. Baseball slugger Jack Clark had 18 cars and owed money on 17 when he went broke. And don't get just boring Porsches and Mercedes. Go for Maybachs."
5. "Spend stupid money on other really stupid stuff. In going from $300 million up to $27 million down, Mike Tyson once spent $9,180 in two months to care for his white tiger. That's why Iron Mike's picture is on our logo!"
7. "Sign over power of attorney. What's it mean? Who cares? Just sign! The guy you're signing it over to knows. And while you play Xbox, he'll be buying large portions of Switzerland for himself. Kareem Abdul-Jabbar let an agent named Tom Collins have power of attorney once, and it cost Kareem $9 million before he figured it out."
(Excerpt) Read more at sports.espn.go.com ...
Every professional athlete needs a BS Bat Boy. This would be a person who watches everything the jock does and if things sound stupid, yells “BS!” and whaps the jock on the knees with a baseball bat. I volunteer to get paid to do this.
This sre applies to the Obermamessiah as well. Yet the Idiot wants to be PO**S!
“Every professional athlete needs a BS Bat Boy. This would be a person who watches everything the jock does and if things sound stupid, yells “BS!” and whaps the jock on the knees with a baseball bat. I volunteer to get paid to do this.”
Every lotto jackpot winner needs that too. Its amazing how many of them end up broke within a few years too.
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