Extra anus kills four-legged chick

stuff ^ | 10/25/2006 | YVONNE TAHANA

[Ultra Sonic 007]

Forzie the four-legged chicken will cluck no more.

The Te Uku-bred Barnevelder chick - hatched at Marlene Dickey's property at the start of last month - has died.

But it wasn't the extra legs that led to its death, more likely an extra anus, Mrs Dickey believes.

"He developed two bottoms and I think he got glugged up," she said.

While she was surprised by Forzie's death - he weighed a "good pound of butter" and was gaining feathers slowly - it was not totally unexpected, she said.

And it was fun while it lasted.

"He was a bit of a laugh."

Looking ungainly on its extra legs but twice as cute, the bird was an exception to the rule that chickens with defects are not normally born alive.

He was found dead on Friday and is now in the Dickeys' freezer waiting to be stuffed.

After he's been to the taxidermist, the family plan to donate the bird to Auckland Museum.

[Ultra Sonic 007]

The aforementioned picture.

So...how long until a sexual joke comes up? Place your bets now.

[Cobra64]

For a moment, I thought the article was about Jon Cary.

[dead]

My extra anus tried to kill me too, so I broke up with her.

[Question Liberal Authority]

Dang. I thought this was about Helen Thomas.

[cripplecreek]

That's on effed up clucker.

[Silly]

Kerry killed Hillary?

[geopyg]

I missread the headline. I thought it was "Extra anus kills two-legged *ick" and would find a picture of Jon Carry speaking.

[Larry Lucido]

LOL!

[geopyg]

OHHHH!

[To Hell With Poverty]

"He was found dead on Friday and is now in the Dickeys' freezer waiting to be stuffed."

Ah, he died just in time for Thanksgiving!

"After he's been to the taxidermist, the family plan to donate the bird to Auckland Museum."

Oh...*that* kind of stuffed....

[Rocky]

I thought it was an article about Bill doing in Hillary.

[Sir Francis Dashwood]

For a moment, I thought the article was about Jon Cary.

They didn't say he was talking with it... then again, maybe they didn't need to...

[kalee]

And I thought the article was going to be about Jon Carry.

[ChuteTheMall]

I expected a Dixie Chicks thread.

[DeFault User]

I thought only Dixie Chicks were extraneous.

[Larry Lucido]

"So I told the genie I wanted a cute chick with a little extra in the ass and legs department."

[Billthedrill]

Funny - the Dixie Chicks have an extra anus too...

[Young Werther]

If we could breed a herd of these double anus chicks and paint them red, white and blue they could be campaign chicks of Kerry!

Imagine their image on a T-Shirt!

..and what as Heinz soup! No transfat. A delicious delight made in Heaven!

[Silly]

I worry that more people aren't worrying that people aren't worrying enough about the chickens.

Also, I worry about the chickens.

[JRios1968]

The Monkey with 5 Asses seems to be doing ok

[Captainpaintball]

Somewhere, a certain Massachusetts CONgressman sheds a tear of regret for a love never obtained...

[skr]

Poor little creature.

[bigbob]

The word anus is normally associated with "Dixie" Chicks, not "Dickey's" Chick...

[theDentist]

It's always that unexpected ***hole that gets you killed.

[2ndDivisionVet]

A perfect mascot for the defeatocrat party: extra legs to run away faster, too many @$$holes, a certified chicken, and bird that won't fly.

[Atchafalaya]

Too bad it didn't have headers for it's dual exhausts.
Just damn!

[Atchafalaya]

LOL!!!

[true_blue_texican]

ROTFLMAO!!!!!

[JerseyJohn61]

I came to this thread thinking i'd be cryin'
for that poor little birdy. I'm cryin' all
right; with the best laugh i've had all day
folks. lolololol....JJ61

[WestVirginiaRebel]

I've heard of "Ripping somebody a new one," but...

[Silly]

Imagine having the job of writing headlines...

Hmmm... Second, no double, no let's make it "Extra".

Anus? Nah, can't put that in a headline. Aw, why not. "Extra Anus."

Contributes to the demise of? Not pithy enough. Need some pith. "Kills. Extra Anus Kills..."

Okay, making progress! Home stretch:

Deformed... Additionally equipped... Extra-legged -- oops, already used Extra. Legged -- sounds pithy -- Four-Legged Chick!

"Extra Anus Kills Four-Legged Chick"! Hurray!

Time to spin the wheel again and buy another vowel. Vanna, if you please?

[sourcery]

This story ended badly...

[Patton@Bastogne]

.


CrippleCreek,


That's on effed up clucker.


Give the poor animal a break ... it didn't ask to be born that way, and probably did the best it could ...

I hope that no one's around to laugh and joke about you when something in your biological machine malfunctions ... and they're laughing at your suffering or death.


Patton-at-Bastogne

"May God and His Angels Guard Your Sacred Throne, and May You Long Become It."

Shakespeare, Henry V, Act I, Scene II


.

[Frank_2001]

LOL!

[beethovenfan]

"...and now, a man with three buttocks."

[Blowtorch]

Anus problems affect chicks?

God tried to compensate by giving the chick an extra 2 legs, but there's really no way around two anuses.

[msnimje]

Hillary has an extra anus but I am not sure about the 4 legs.

[Slings and Arrows]

What a pity. He was an ideal Democrat.

[Tribune7]

That's what's eventually going to happen to the Democratic Party.

[JerseyJohn61]

Look, I feel bad for any suffering
the little fellow may have had too.
But if it had been born normal, it
probably would have wound up one
day running around minus a head....JJ61

[Slings and Arrows]

"So I told the genie I wanted a cute chick with a little extra in the ass and legs department."

*dingdingding* We have a winner!

[Grizzled Bear]

What a pity. He was an ideal Democrat.
________________________________________________________

But he will still vote. In several districts!

[dayglored]

How do things like this happen? Easy!

Four-legged Chick: "Four legs? I need four legs like I need another a$$hole..."

RIP chick.

[dhs12345]

"Ah, he died just in time for Thanksgiving!"

Yeah. They won't have to fight over the leg and thigh meat. Plenty of it to go around.

[Slings and Arrows]

But he will still vote. In several districts!

And no fair asking him for ID.

[Silly]

After he's been to the taxidermist, the family plan to donate the bird to Auckland Museum.

Calling Norman Bates! Mr. Bates, the Dickey family needs you! Please tell your mother she's getting a new roommate in her freezer!

My personal practice is, whenever I donate stuffed animlas with two anuses to museums, I always make sure the plaque read, "Donated anonymously."

[weegee]

FR needs a thread like this like I need another hole in my...

[bannie]

My extra anus tried to kill me too, so I broke up with her.

uh. Your name's "dead."

8`\

[phantomworker]

Well, that's good to hear! (Should've known you'd find a pic for this thread. ;))