Awkward moments abound in penis pump trial

WRAL - AP ^ | Jun 28, 2:32 PM EDT | SHAUN SCHAFER

[rface]

BRISTOW, Okla. (AP) -- Former Judge Donald D. Thompson, a veteran of 23 years on the bench, is on trial on charges he used a penis pump on himself in the courtroom while sitting in judgment of others.

Over the past few days, the jurors have watched a defense attorney and a prosecutor pantomime masturbation. A doctor has lectured on the lengths the defendant was willing to go to enhance his sexual performance.

The white-handled sexual device sits before the jury box for hours at a time. Occasionally an attorney picks it up and squeezes the handle, demonstrating the "sh-sh" sound of air rushing through the contraption's plastic tubing.

Thompson's former court reporter, Lisa Foster, wiped away tears as she described tracing an unfamiliar "sh-sh" in the courtroom to her boss. She testified that between 2001 and 2003 she saw Thompson expose himself at least 15 times.

[dead]

Best.

Headline.

Ever.

[LukeL]

If that were me I would plead guilty.

[Cincinatus]

Well, you know what they say: "You can put it in your lawyers hands, but it'll never stand up in court!"

[The Iceman Cometh]

A doctor has lectured on the lengths...

too easy....

[rface]

I guess this puts Limbaughs Viagra issue in a different perspective

[cripplecreek]

Will the defendant please rise.

[goldstategop]

I guess he must either have been looking at porn magazines or mentally undressing attractive female jurors during the trial. A model judge!

(Denny Crane: "Every one should carry a gun strapped to their waist. We need more - not less guns.")

[livius]

ROFLOL!!!

[ncountylee]

his $7,489.91-a-month pension would be in jeopardy

If convicted, his obscenely bloated pension should be stripped from the pervert.

[dfwgator]

"Honest, it wasn't mine."

[Liz]

The ups and downs of the judicial system on display here (smirk).

[yellowdoghunter]

What a disgrace this guy is to the bench and an embarrassment to Oklahoma. However, we are getting a good laugh out of it. This man is sick and I hope they find him guilty.

[Hegemony Cricket]

You think he insisted on a rigid interpretation of the law?

[dighton]

Calling a judge a wanker not contempt: Vic Court of Appeal

[cripplecreek]

The only way this could get any better is if Johnny Cochrain were still alive to defend the judge.

If the pump don't fit.....

[Sax]

"She testified that during a trial in 2002, she heard the pump during the emotional testimony of a murdered toddler's grandfather.

The grandfather "was getting real teary-eyed, and the judge was up there pumping on that pump," she said. "It was sickening."

Yeah...dead toddler..(shhhhht)..(shhhhht)...saddened grandfather..(shhhht)..(shhhhht)....

He's truly a freak among freaks.

Won't need any implements to get some pumping action in the klink.

[stylecouncilor]

ping

[mikrofon]

A doctor has lectured on the lengths the defendant was willing to go to enhance his sexual performance.

There comes a point of diminishing returns...

[alwaysconservative]

I agree!

[A.Hun]

If convicted, his obscenely bloated pension should be stripped from the pervert.

I'm sure glad you said pension.

[Liz]

Depending on the effort one puts into it, the law can work on a sliding scale----sometimes reaching its highest pinnacle, sometimes limping along like a deflated balloon.

[Constitution Day]

Heh. From your link:

"There was another case where a defendant actually dropped their trousers in court, bent over and showed the judge the words 'Happy Christmas' written on their behind, and that was found not to be in contempt also. I think that defendant was probably fairly lucky, I might say."

[cripplecreek]

The penal system will straighten him out.

[DungeonMaster]

Very groovy post!

[Liz]

Yeah, but sometimes the kinks in the system have to be worked and worked. Ask Bruce and his girlfriend.

[Hegemony Cricket]

Sounds like a typical case of one-eyed blind justice...

[B Knotts]

Oh...man...after reading that link, I'm literally in tears laughing.

Quote of the year, at the very least:

RICHARD LEADER: Yes. What actually tends to happen with insults to judges is that findings of contempt are not made. There was another case where a defendant actually dropped their trousers in court, bent over and showed the judge the words 'Happy Christmas' written on their behind, and that was found not to be in contempt also. I think that defendant was probably fairly lucky, I might say.

ROTFLMAO

[Echo Talon]

Now that just sucks....

[cowboyway]

I guess this puts Limbaughs Viagra issue in a different perspective

I thing that I've heard.....no.....I'm sure that I've heard a "sh-sh" while listening to Rush.

[yellowdoghunter]

If the pump don't fit.....

LOL! Oh, my gosh!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

[cripplecreek]

Bailiff, whack his pee pee.

[yellowdoghunter]

There are also reports that he clipped his toe nails during one trial and also shaved himself, (ya know, down there) during another. This guy is something else.....

[theFIRMbss]

>Former Judge Donald D. Thompson, a veteran of 23 years on the bench, is on trial on charges he used a penis pump on himself in the courtroom while sitting in judgment of others

Now we'll all wonder
how many Freepers do this
while they are freeping!

[Liz]

Hey, you can depend on it---justice comes in various sizes.

[Liz]

Judge and his wife.

[Ditter]

His poor wife in the photo, standing bravely at his side but unable to hold her head up. She will never be able to hold her head up again if that little town in OK is like the little town we lived in. If Mr. Ditter did something like that I would NOT be standing up with him, I'd be home packing to move.

[Constitution Day]

Boy, I bet she's proud.

LMAO

[subterfuge]

Thompson's former court reporter, Lisa Foster, wiped away tears as she described tracing an unfamiliar "sh-sh" in the courtroom to her boss.

Must have been tears of laughter because this is just funny as it can be. Aside from the fact that American taxpayers paid the perv for decades.

[Dinsdale]

Maybe she bought him the pump?

Do you believe she did'nt know her hubby was a perv? How long had they been married?

[NRA1995]

A doctor has lectured on the lengths the defendant was willing to go to enhance his sexual performance

OOOOOOOOOOOOK......

[NRA1995]

His poor wife in the photo, standing bravely at his side but unable to hold her head up

If the judge had been able to hold his head up without the pump, she wouldn't have to hold her head down.

[martin_fierro]

No amateurs, please. Send FReepmail if you want on/off ISHP list
The List of Ping Lists

"No wonder Justice is blind" (best line ever)

[MozarkDawg]

Ahhhhh, so now we understand why judges don't wear pants underneath their robes ...

[NonLinear]

Hmmm. Could receive a stiff sentence....

[Sax]

"There are also reports that he clipped his toe nails during one trial and also shaved himself, (ya know, down there) during another. This guy is something else"

Witness: "Then he shot my husband in his belly...twice..(snob..sniffle)"

Judges thoughts: (Hmm. Let's see, excercised the 'ole pecker, check. Clipped my toenails, check. Shaved down the boys, check....man, what is this bitch babbling about?!)

[Echo Talon]

Bailiff, whack his pee pee.

what was that from? my brother says that all the time! LOL

[Lucky9teen]

I'm sure he'll face some stiff penalties.

[NonLinear]

I think it was a Cheech & Chong routine...

[NonLinear]

Cheech and Chong, "Trippin' In Court"