BUSH & HARPER'S SHOCKING SECRET DEAL

Bourque News Watch ^ | April 1, 2006. | Pierre Bourque

[fanfan]

BREAKING:

Bourque has learned that Prime Minister Stephen Harper and US President George Bush have agreed to swap Alaska for New Brunswick.

The idea, first broached in Cancun two days ago by officials discussing bilateral trade issues, was said to have been well received by both leaders late Thursday as they sipped margaritas, dipped corn chips into spicy salsa, and contemplated the various merits of the deal.

Sources inside the Prime Minister's Office indicated under condition of anonymity late Friday night that the plan would see the province of New Brunswick amalgamated into the State of Maine no later than April 8, 2010, in exchange for the state of Alaska, which would be amalgamated into the Yukon. "It makes eminent sense", said our source, who once attended a Harvard lecture given by the erudite Michael Ignatieff several years ago.

"Both are marginal territories awkwardly placed in their respective countries", noted our source, "and both countries would be strengthened by this type of realignment". In fact, Bourque has confirmed through sources in Cancun that a secret task force has been struck to put together a plan of action based on sound strategic, geopolitical, commercial, and national security reasons strong enough to instigate successful votes in both Congress and Parliament no later than April 8, 2008.

It remains unclear what, if any, say the citizens of Alaska and New Brunswick will have in the decision-making process, though it is understood that both the Governor of Alaska and the Premier of New Brunswick have been briefed and are on side.

Developing..

[fanfan]

[Kozak]

Can we trade the Northeast for Alberta too?

[fanfan]

Talk to Harper.

Who know what he's willing to do?

[fanfan]

Ping!

[Phinanceguy]

Ha Ha, April Fools

[Knitting A Conundrum]

I'd give Maine, NH, Vermont, and Mass for Alberta...Especially MA....but then, I'm biased...

[fanfan]

;-)

[King Prout]

hrmn... if anyone but you posted this to me, I'd suspect it was an april fool's joke...

;)-

[ferri]

it's the salsa. they can't take that spicy hot stuff back east. it has melted Harpers brain. now he is going to be just like Chretien. LOL

[commish]

How about we keep alaska and Take BC and Yukon and give the Canadiens the Entire Northeast.

That way we get plenty more land to check for oil, and we get rid of all the whining crybaby liberals who would oppose it, and the libs get to go to thier beloved Canada.

[fanfan]

You'd be right, too!

[fanfan]

now he is going to be just like Chretien.

Ahhh!

Don't scare me like that!

[ferri]

LOL!!!!!!!! my hubby does a great imitation of him. *shudder* he even mispronounces words and uses the wrong ones. what a prize i have huh? LOL

[fanfan]

Hey, it takes talent to sound as stupid as Chretien.

;-)

[ferri]

that is for sure! his favorite line is "Hi don't like dat guy." lol

[BluH2o]

Throw in the Province of Quebec for good measure. Move the French to New Orleans (they're looking for people) and Florida (most of them winter in FL anyway) and voila ... what a deal.

[fanfan]

That sounds great!

[Tribune7]

That's a bad deal on our part. Now, if we traded Maine and Vermont for Alberta . . .

[fanfan]

OK.

I'll have my government call your government....

[Tribune7]

:-)

[ken5050]

I want PEI incuded in the deal. This way I am guaranteed a secure supply of mussels..

[fanfan]

Thank you for not pulling this thread, and thanks too, for leaving it in breaking as long as you did.

Happy April Fools Day!

[fanfan]

Yeah, OK.

After all, if you didn't have enough mussels, you'd have to start lifting weights.

;-)

[dr_who_2]

Right on!

[dr_who_2]

Did Bush refuse to take Newfoundland?

[ken5050]

One of my fave meals..anytime of year.. takes about 5 minutes max to prepare...with a fresh baguette and a cold brewski..

[fanfan]

Wouldn't you?

;-)

[fanfan]

Now your making me hungry!

[ken5050]

A Newfie is waaaaay too big for Barney to mess with..

[Global2010]

Knew it was bogus when I read "sipping Margaritas together"

President Bush abstains from drinking.

Isn't Margarita a more female type of drink too.

If Bush did drink I would think a good Brew with a few shots.

[fanfan]

I am caught!

;-)

Happy April Fools Day!

[Kozak]

Really? Well Duh.... (;-)

[Tijeras_Slim]

I'm thinking New Orleans for Newfoundland.

[fanfan]

Isn't New Orleans just off the coast of Newfoundland?

[SandyInSeattle]

What will they give us for California?

[Kozak]

What will they give us for California?

$69.95.... Canadian.

[wolfcreek]

Isn't Margarita a more female type of drink too.

Guess you've never had one. They're bi-sexual! Ummm!

[CaptainCanada]

Can we trade the Northeast for Alberta too?

I guess Bush is right.. You guys are addicted to oil..
All I hear from Americans here is "we want Alberta", "we'll trade
anything for Alberta".
I wonder if they have rehabs for oil junkies??

[CaptainCanada]

That's a bad deal on our part. Now, if we traded Maine and Vermont for Alberta . .

Another oil junkie..
Thou shall not covet thy neighbours oil bearing lands...

[CaptainCanada]

I'd give Maine, NH, Vermont, and Mass for Alberta...Especially MA....but then, I'm biased...

Biased in favor of oil bearing lands, eh.
Keep yer mitts off our oil.

[labard1]

It's not just the oil in Alberta that we want, it's the people, too. They are "our kind of folks." New Brunswick would be to the left of Vermont.

[Tribune7]

Not coveting. We're trading you Vermont. You'd get Ben and Jerry's.

[CaptainCanada]

It's not just the oil in Alberta that we want, it's the people, too. They are "our kind of folks." New Brunswick would be to the left of Vermont.

I was raised on a farm and I know horseshit when I see it
And how the hell would you know that they're your "kind of folk"???
I have relatives in Alberta and I've been there a lot. So I know that
the Canadians there are the same as Canadians elsewhere.
Except they're sitting on oil - Texas tea - black gold.

[SandyInSeattle]

It's a deal.

[fanfan]

What will they give us for California?

British Columbia?

[sionnsar]

Can we trade the Northeast for Alberta too?

Let's toss in Seattle (city limits) and San Francisco if we need to sweeten the deal. We may need to put up some walls and tear down a bridge or two, but in both cases that ought to be pretty easy.

[labard1]

That's why they vote Liberal, eh?

[CaptainCanada]

That's why they vote Liberal, eh?

Pssst, don't telll anyone, but we voted in a Conservative Gov't at
the Federal level. And with Alberta having only 8% of the seats in Gov't,
there had to be a lot of support for the Conservatives in the rest
of the Country, eh?
BTW, are you going to retain control of the House and Senate in
the Fall or is YOUR Gov't going to be LIBERAL????
Sounds like y'all may want to be more focused on your country
rather than wanting a piece of ours.

[labard1]

But Alberta regularly voted for the Liberals during the long years of Liberal domination in Canada, just like the rest of Canada, eh?

And Alberta must have voted Liberal in the same proportion as the rest of the country this last time. The Conservatives only had a plurality in Alberta, eh?

As for the US, the betting site Intrade shows 78% odds on the GOP keeping control of the Senate, and 56% odds on keeping the House. Not too bad, eh?

Let me be clear, I don't want most of Canada. This thread is a joke. I just like Alberta, and have found most of the people there that I've met to be different from Canadians in the east, for example. Maybe we've met different people. Wouldn't surprise me at all.

Enjoy your farm. I know when someone's spreading manure, too.