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Brave Pro-Abortion Legislator Challenges Group Of Nuns To Fistfight (\sarc - if you're an idiot)
Babylon Bee ^ | 5/3/2019 | Bee Staff

Posted on 05/09/2019 8:51:50 AM PDT by budj

HARRISBURG, PA—Pennsylvania's favorite pro-abortion legislator, Brian Sims, wanted to show he was tough. While most guys would join a local MMA club or luchador circuit, Sims isn't most guys. He had a much better idea. Sims wandered into a local Catholic church and challenged a group of singing nuns to a fistfight over the issue of abortion.

"Hey nuns, come on down here and fight me if you want to show abortion is bad!" he called out, adding several slurs and expletives to his courageous speech. "Yeah, that's what I thought! Chicken, eh? Probably hateful Chick-fil-A chicken too, and not woke chicken like Popeye's!"

Several nuns were about ready to perform a double reverse elbow-drop on him from the rafters, but a priest stopped them, according to witnesses.

"Oh, I see, running away, eh? You yellow [expletive]! I'll punch your face off with my bravery!" he cried as he slowly backed away.

At publishing time, Sims had hastily moved along when someone his own size showed up to accept his challenge.


TOPICS: Health/Medicine; Humor; Religion
KEYWORDS: abortion; babylonbee; briansims; coward; funnyhaha; genderdysphoria; homosexualagenda; infanticide; medicareforall; obamacare; parodysite; pennsylvania; philadelphia; poltroom; satire; yellowbelly
I'll put $100 on the nuns.
1 posted on 05/09/2019 8:51:50 AM PDT by budj
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To: budj

Is Brian Sims a queer? He sure sounds like he is.


2 posted on 05/09/2019 8:53:05 AM PDT by MeganC (There is nothing feminine about feminism.)
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To: budj

I know it’s parody ... but still...


3 posted on 05/09/2019 8:55:20 AM PDT by Skywise
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To: MeganC

Yeah - flaming, even.


4 posted on 05/09/2019 8:55:40 AM PDT by Skywise
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To: MeganC

His actions and speech are typical of what I see outside of the Q bar next to where I work at night. At the normie bar on the other side the guys who get into fights don’t yell much they just punch each other or “square off” until some woman comes out and gets between them and gives them an excuse to go have another drink.


5 posted on 05/09/2019 9:01:32 AM PDT by arthurus (+[*_*]?)
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To: budj

I’ll second that


6 posted on 05/09/2019 9:07:16 AM PDT by BigEdLB (BigEdLB, Russian BOT, At your service)
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To: budj

Is this for real? Did the obnoxious faggie invade a church and threaten nuns?

And who elected this bitch?


7 posted on 05/09/2019 9:07:26 AM PDT by elcid1970 (No matter how bad things get, it can only be worse in New Jersey!)
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To: MeganC

>s Brian Sims a queer? He sure sounds like he is.

Yes, he is. Proudly so.

He’s a loser all around.


8 posted on 05/09/2019 9:22:27 AM PDT by Westbrook (Children do not divide your love, they multiply it)
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To: elcid1970

OK Rodrigo - that’s it.

In the name of all the “/s” FReepers, I hereby sentence you to read ALL the following /s Babylon Bee articles on the following page:

https://babylonbee.com/news

If that doesn’t work, it’s a month of KP duty at the Ministry of Silly Walks!


9 posted on 05/09/2019 9:33:23 AM PDT by QBFimi (It is not your responsibility to finish the work of perfecting the world... Tarfon)
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To: budj

Satire, but like the best satire one doesn’t have to strain one’s imagination to imagine it as reality.


10 posted on 05/09/2019 9:35:45 AM PDT by Dr. Sivana (There is no salvation in politics.)
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To: budj

They almost had me on that one.

BB is good.


11 posted on 05/09/2019 9:55:42 AM PDT by metmom ( ...fixing our eyes on Jesus, the Author and Perfecter of our faith...)
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To: QBFimi

Thanks for the link to that.

There are some terrific articles there.


12 posted on 05/09/2019 10:03:10 AM PDT by metmom ( ...fixing our eyes on Jesus, the Author and Perfecter of our faith...)
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To: budj

This is deeply disturbing.

13 posted on 05/09/2019 10:10:18 AM PDT by rlmorel (Leftists: Can't control their emotions. Can't control their actions. Deny them control of anything.)
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To: rlmorel
This is deeply disturbing.

I'll say it is! Do you know what the muzzle blast will be like when she lets loose against evil-doers from inside the car?

14 posted on 05/09/2019 10:19:18 AM PDT by Billthedrill
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To: Billthedrill
"...when she lets loose against evil-doers from inside the car..."

Or some fourth grader chewing gum in class!

15 posted on 05/09/2019 10:55:52 AM PDT by rlmorel (Leftists: Can't control their emotions. Can't control their actions. Deny them control of anything.)
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To: budj

When you look at the map of Brian Sims district, the 182nd, it becomes clear why they re-elected him. He would not make it in a district with normal people. This Ghoul baby killer sounds really brave. He would not be so brave with a man.


16 posted on 05/09/2019 3:05:49 PM PDT by maxwellsmart_agent
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