Skip to comments.McConnell Concocts a "Chameleon" Election Strategy [semi-satire]
Posted on 08/20/2018 10:17:25 AM PDT by John Semmens
Concerned by predictions that a Democratic "blue wave" could lead to a loss of Republican majorities in the House and Senate, Senate Majority Leader Mitch McConnell (R-Ken) has devised what he boasted is "a foolproof plan to avert disaster."
The gist of this plan is to blur the differences between the two Parties by scheduling a number of votes on bipartisan bills that garner support from both sides of the aisle. The bills the Majority Leader has in mind include votes on the Defense and Labor, Health and Human Services spending bill, opioids legislation and the Water Resources Development Act. "I call it the 'chameleon' ploy," McConnell said. "If Republicans and Democrats are voting on the same side of this issues voters won't have a good reason to vote against us and the blue wave will be dissipated."
"We're in a tough spot," McConnell argued. "The tax cuts we passed have energized the media against our Party. They can be counted on to remind voters that we implemented legislation that effectively pushed more people into the workforcepeople that were previously perfectly comfortable subsisting on welfare. The deregulation implemented under President Trump's direction has enabled an economic expansion that has created new jobs that undermined the rationale for idleness. Democrats will lambaste us for this in their campaign ads. The 'chameleon' strategy will moderate voters anger over what Republicans have done to disrupt their lives."
McConnell rebuffed President Trump's request to schedule a vote on making the individual component of the tax cut bill permanent on the dual grounds that "this would simply remind voters who may have already forgotten who pushed the tax cut through and would anger the Democrats who will likely be the majority after the election no matter what we do to try to avert that."
if you missed any of this week's other semi-news/semi-satire posts you can find them at...
Are you sure this is satire?
It sounds exactly like the Bush League Republicans.
Methinks Semmens has blurred the line between satire and Republican cowardice.
John’s either got a tap into the McConnell dining room or Elaine Chao’s been giving him tidbits of pillow talk.
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