Posted on 11/25/2015 3:13:58 PM PST by NYer
Once upon a time, you had to be royalty to be surprised by your food. But these days, an ordinary Thanksgiving gathering is cause for trepidation and excitement. It's 2015, and any turkey you face could be a turducken.Â
The turducken, if youâve managed to avoid its company thus far, is exactly what it sounds likeâa chicken stuffed into a duck stuffed into a turkey, all deboned and layered with various types of stuffing. It looks like a regular turkey, but, when cut, magically reveals its true soul (the duck), as well as its soulâs soul (the chicken). It would fit nicely next to a Midwestern dessert salad, but is also the kind of main course youâd expect from a Thanksgiving feast thrown by the psychedelic machine minds at Google Deep Dream. In short, it is a truly mysterious food, melding the nostalgic with the futuristic, the traditional with the impossible.Â
The carnivore-baiting chimera has been a gold-plated staple of New Orleans cuisine since 1980, when Chef Paul Prudhomme began serving up a Cajun-inflected version in his restaurant, K-Paulâs Louisiana Kitchen. Prudhomme trademarked the name in 1986, and weâve been calling it that ever since.
But although the branding may be new, the meatmanteau it describes is not. Roman emperors were said to enjoy the occasional âtetrafarmacum,â a concoction of sowâs udder, pheasant, wild boar, and ham, piled together in a starchy shell. Medieval lords would flaunt their prestige by commissioning complex âillusion foodsââhuge pastry castles stuffed with meat and fruit, or roasted peacocks with the feathers carefully replaced, so that diners could have their âcock and eat it too. One 15th-century king was fond of cockentrice, a pigâs top half sewn onto a roosterâs bottom. The more specific vision of "putting one bird inside another bird inside of another bird and cooking them" goes back to the Renaissance, when it was practically common practice, says food historian Andrew F. Smith.
As meat became less of a luxury, everyday people got in on the game. By the 18th century, ordinary (though ambitious) British homemakers were encouraged to impress their guests with âChristmas Pyesâ filled with three or four nested fowls. By the 19th century, Smith says, âthere are many recipes in American cookbooks that talk about the same kind of concept,â often adding beef tongue, pork, and other meats to the fray.
After Prudhomme carved his version into the history books, the turducken became a regional favorite, a joyfully off-kilter food you could get in the joyfully off-kilter city of New Orleans. Nationwide popularity came a couple of decades later, courtesy of enthusiastic fan John Madden, who carved one on live TV during a Thanksgiving Day football game broadcast in 1997. After that, the turducken expanded its reach, slowly pulling in devotees from up north and out west. In 2010, it made the Oxford English Dictionary, and now you can buy a frozen one at Samâs Club.Â
There are tons of strange, previously royal foods commoners wouldnât dream of mass-producing. Why did the ungainly turducken make the leap? Smith thinks it was a question of etiquette and thrift. With a regular turkey, âyou can only do so much with a knife and a fork,â he says, âand if youâre in polite company, on occasion, it can get a little awkward, or you waste a lot of meat.â The turducken, he says, sidesteps these problemsâyou get all of the meat with none of the mess. (Tell that to John Madden, who said of his first time:Â âIt smelled and looked so good. I didn't have any plates or silverware or anything, and I just started eating it with my hands.â)
J. Kenji Lopez-Alt of Serious Eats perfected his turducken recipe in 2012. But after years of obsessing over oven temperatures and stuffing composition, he thinks the appeal is skin-deep. Taste-wise, he says, a turducken is less than the sum of its birds. âItâs a stunt food,â he says. âPeople make it because itâs a feat of engineering. Itâs just, 'What thing can we stuff into another thing?'â
Lopez-Alt attributes the canonization of this impulse to the internet, where âif someone does something ridiculous, somebodyâs going to say, âHey, look at this ridiculous thing.â Stuffing things into other things is the online stunt-food version of dressing to impress. âThatâs how Taco Bell comes up with new menu items, right?â he asks.
A quick glance at the turducken internet reveals that the standard variety no longer suffices. The turducken arms race has escalated, leading to monstrosities like the 12-bird roast, the Lovecraftian Cthurkey, and the cherpumple, a dessert-course spinoff that has several different pies baked inside the layers of a cake.
This is only natural. In a world where ordinary people eat turducken, the true royals, internet or otherwise, have to separate themselves from the plebes. And the way to do that, as Lopez-Alt says, is to "stick things in other things" in increasingly immoderate ways.
Yes, I know of the turducken. It’s retarded.
For anyone looking for a change of pace for Thanksgiving dinner, try a standing rib roast. Use the leftover bones to make Vincent Price’s Deviled Rib Bones recipe. Google it.
You can always get the small deboned Butterball turkey breast roast to serve for those who simply must have turkey instead of prime rib. You know, crazy people.
“Yes, I know of the turducken. Itâs retarded.
For anyone looking for a change of pace for Thanksgiving dinner, try a standing rib roast.”
A man after my own heart. Planning on the standing rib roast for Christmas.
Happy Thanksgiving :)
Sounds downright nauseating.
Haggis! All you need to know.
Haggis!
Always glad to see Charles Phoenix’s creation the Cherpumple getting known! I regret not enjoying one of his cakes at an event not long ago when I had the chance! Love his kitchen creations — charlesphoenix.com
With Yorkshire pudding!
And on last night’s episode of NCIS, they showed Ducky’s assistant sewing up a turducken.
I’ll take the Turducken and the vegeturducken together please...with gravy please.
Turducken? You lost me at turd. Chuckey might be more appetizing.
When her hubby started carving my youngest sister saw the eggs and said "OMG you cooked a pregnant turkey!". Big Sis bolted from the room. 30 years later she still makes ham instead of turkey.
My family put the FUN in dysFUNctional. Last dinner I attended I openly carried a sidearm and told them if 0bama was mentioned I'd happily shoot the offender. No more invites for the last 7 years.
BTW I'm mesquite smoking a brined turkey over night long and slow.
Happy Thanksgiving FReeper FRiends!
Kids are away, no family coming this year, so just the wife and me.
Screw the poultry - we’re having thick, juicy ribeyes, hot off the grill!
You’re saying “Turd, duck, en what?” Complete the meal parts please.
Sounds like a pretty crappy meal to me.
Try hot little seasoned brisket for a change. You’ll never go back and thousands of turkeys will bless you.
I think I have Vincent Price's cookbook around here somewhere - I'll have to look up that recipe.
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