Posted on 03/27/2014 3:28:37 AM PDT by Reaganite Republican
-PING-
A girl goes into the doctor’s office for a checkup. As she takes off her blouse, he notices a red “H” on her chest. “How did you get that mark on your chest?” asks the doctor.
“Oh, my boyfriend went to Harvard and he’s so proud of it that he never takes off his Harvard sweatshirt, even when we make love,” she replies. “I guess it just leaves an impression.”
A couple of days later, another girl comes in for a checkup. As she takes off her blouse, he notices a blue “Y” on her chest. “How did you get that mark on your chest?” asks the doctor.
“Oh, my boyfriend went to Yale and he’s so proud of it that he never takes off his Yale sweatshirt, even when we make love,” she replies.
A couple of days later, Hillary comes in for a checkup. As she takes off her blouse, he notices a green “M” on her chest. “Do you have a boyfriend at Michigan?” asks the doctor.
“No, but I have a girlfriend at Wisconsin. Why do you ask?”
LOL...nice way to kick off the day...thanks
EXCTLY TRUE !
But what do you do for the letter: "H" ?
It goes the same , both ways !!
>>D: “All I said was ‘Hello sir, I’m Hillary Clinton’s limo driver, and I’m the one who just killed the old cow...’ “<<
Oh, if only ....
Nice, I might steal that for the Friday silliness thread. Giving proper credit of course.
Hillary Clinton found herself at the Pearly Gates one morning demanding to know why she was there. Hillary was stamping her foot as St. Peter explained that her time on earth had run its course. Hillary was not satisfied and demanded he double check his records. St. Peter went to the sacred vault and retrieved the record book.
Hillary glared at him with scorn as he looked up her name. Aha, St. Peter said as he located Hillary in the book. Here it is, very clear, you are due here shortly after your eightieth birthday.
I am not eighty you idiot, you’ve made a mistake. St. Peter closely scrutinized his record book, shook his head, and announced, according to your billable hours you’re over eighty.
Fresh from her shower, Hillary stands in front of the mirror, complaining to Bill that her breasts are too small. Instead of his standard response of reassuring her that wasn't the case, Bill uncharacteristically comes up with a suggestion. "If you want your breasts to grow, then every day take a piece of toilet paper and rub it between your breasts for a few seconds."
Willing to try anything, Hillary fetches a piece of toilet paper, and stands in front of the mirror, rubbing it between her breasts. "How long will this take?" she asks.
"They'll grow larger over a period of years," he replies.
She stops. "Why do you think rubbing a piece of toilet paper between my breasts every day will make my breasts grow over the years?"
Bill responds with "Worked for your butt, didn't it?"
And my favorite ...
Hillary visits school
Hillary Clinton went to an elementary school in Ithaca, New York to talk about the world. After her talk, she asked for questions. One little boy put up his hand, and Hillary asked his name.
"Kenneth."
"What is your question, Kenneth?"
"I have three questions:
First - What happened to your medical health care plan?
Second - Why would you run for president after your husband shamed the office?
Third - What happened to all those things you took when you left the White House?"
Just then, the bell rings for recess. Hilary told the kids that she would continue after recess.
When they resume, Hilary says, "Okay where were we? Who has a question?"
A different little boy puts his hand up. Hilary points to him and asked his name.
"Larry."
"And what is your question?"
"I have five questions:
First - What happened to your medical health care plan?
Second - Why would you run for president after your husband shamed the office?
Third - What happened to all those things you took when you left the White House?"
Fourth - Why did the recess bell ring 20 minutes early?
And Fifth - What happened to Kenneth?"
Good joke. However, it pegs you as an Eastern Elitist. To a Westerner, M stands for Missouri. Now for the truly elite, those who grew up NORTH of the Mississippi, M means Minnesota.
Good one
Humor Ping
The M is green though (as the joke was written)... so Michigan (yellow) and Wisconsin (white) don’t jive.
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