Unemployment Rate for Government Workers Half that of Private Sector

Semi-News/Semi-Satire ^ | 8 Dec 2012 | John Semmens

[John Semmens]

While the national rate of unemployment for private sector workers exceeds 8%, the rate for government workers is under 4%. US Secretary of Labor Hilda Solis argued that “this is just one more piece of evidence bolstering the President’s economic plan.”

“The President’s critics are fond of alleging that a tax increase will hurt the economy,” Solis said. “But let’s take President Obama’s advice and ‘look at the numbers.’ The private sector appears to be relatively inefficient when it comes to job creation. Despite being allowed to keep more than half of the money they earn, private sector businesses still can’t get unemployment below 8%. Contrast this with the under 4% unemployment rate in the public sector and I think you’ll see where we ought to be putting the nation’s resources for maximum growth.”

Solis maintained that “as we can see, the private sector is a major drag on the economy. If more people would see that funds are lying sterile in the hands of private sector businesses when they could be more effectively deployed by government the Republican opposition to the President’s proposed tax increases would be regarded as a criminal expropriation of what should be community property.”

The Secretary expressed her hope that “the American public will rise up against the capitalist despoilers of the nation’s wealth and demand that their congressional representatives support the President’s efforts to reclaim the nation’s wealth for the benefit of the people.”

In related news, at the same time that the Great Recession was reducing householder net wealth by 39%, members of congress saw their net wealth increase by 14%–greatly relieving the anxieties of Americans worried that those who govern them might have faced unspeakable hardships during the past few years.

if you missed any of this week's other semi-news/semi-satire posts you can find them at...

http://azconservative.org/2012/12/08/amount-spent-on-welfare-exceeds-average-income/

[South40]

It's a number the liberals can manipulate more easily.

Unemployment Plunges to 3.8% for Government Workers; Government Adds 35,000 Jobs in November, 544,000 Since July

[MNDude]

This makes no sense. If you are a government worker, then you are employed, so shouldn’t it be 0%?

[NEMDF]

Something about “the private sector is doing fine” is running through my brain.

[E. Pluribus Unum]

If you are unemployed, how can you be a government worker?

[SkyPilot]

Because his piece is satire. Hilarious, isn’t he? He pulls this garbage all the time.....masking his made up words interwoven with news threads here on FR. Just ignore him.