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Help! My printer won't print no matter how much I shout at it!
The Register ^ | Fri 25 Sep 2020 | Richard Speed

Posted on 09/27/2020 7:09:29 PM PDT by nickcarraway

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To: nickcarraway

If someone wants to buy a chainsaw, the intelligent ask someone who uses them and visits a saw repair shop.

Same goes for a truck.

People who buy printers on the basis of advertisements or any other BS reason get what they deserve, including the incredibly large amount of money spent on ink which was as good as having been burned.

Free advice...
Be humble: Ask a professional (more than one is ACES). Not everyone is out to just make a commission, but the fact is that most people just don’t give a damn unless you ask for advice.

Punchline: In equipment and anything driven by firmware/software the percentage of problems resolved by a hard boot is not merely cliche’ like the answering machine in ‘The IT Crowd’.

Power cycling should rank right up there with personal finance for high schoolers, but we all know the reality.

True story: I had a 4 year-old side-by-side frostless refrigerator stop keeping cool. On the basis of evidence of a leak, I postulated that it might be refrigerant (refrigeration is NOT an area of my expertise).

I called a repair place and paid the “diagnosis fee” of $80, for which they told me that they could take it back to their shop and see what they could do, estimating that my total out of pocket might be a couple hundred more plus parts.

I balked. There was an appliance guy - former military and LEO - at my shop complex. I walked over and asked him about it one day. His response: Unplug it, let it set for 3 days minimum, see what happens.

I asked for advice and it paid off: I had that fridge for another trouble-free 8 years in my garage. In its case, it was physics, not software (frozen lines), but these days the same logic holds true for appliances (hard boot).


41 posted on 09/27/2020 10:10:24 PM PDT by logi_cal869 (-cynicus the "concern troll" a/o 10/03/2018 /!i!! &@$%&*(@ -)
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To: Chode

Funny, but true. A helicopter, squadron unnamed to protect the guilty, had a peculiar fault; namely, the generator would not work when switching from external to internal power. Multiple generators swapped and still wouldn’t work. One electrician figured out that one quick hit with a hammer reactivated the magnetic field and got the generator going.

The helicopter was permanently assigned to new pilots.


42 posted on 09/28/2020 1:38:14 AM PDT by NTHockey (My rules of engagement #1: Take no prisoners. And to the NSA trolls, FU)
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To: smokingfrog

A daisy wheel printer is also incredibly slow — prints out at about the same speed as a good typist.


43 posted on 09/28/2020 3:22:12 AM PDT by erkelly
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To: ZirconEncrustedTweezers

My recommendation for handling the evil incarnate, the printer.

Not everyone knows my name at the job, they all know about my abject hate of printers.


44 posted on 09/28/2020 3:27:48 AM PDT by wally_bert (Transmission tone, Selma)
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To: dfwgator

One of the best scenes of any movie.


45 posted on 09/28/2020 3:28:34 AM PDT by wally_bert (Transmission tone, Selma)
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To: nickcarraway

PC LOAD LETTER


46 posted on 09/28/2020 3:52:58 AM PDT by King_Corey (Buy American - https://madeinamericastore.com/)
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To: nickcarraway

ever made a service call to find the extension strip was plugged into itself?


47 posted on 09/28/2020 4:27:16 AM PDT by techrules2002
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To: techrules2002

lol...I never saw that one but I did have two where the device was plugged into a switched outlet. One complaint was “only works for Fred.”


48 posted on 09/28/2020 4:33:58 AM PDT by mad_as_he$$
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L8r


49 posted on 09/28/2020 5:19:45 AM PDT by 2nd amendment mama (Self Defense is a Basic Human Right!)
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To: higgmeister

heheh...no, you are right!


50 posted on 09/28/2020 6:09:32 AM PDT by rlmorel ("Truth is Treason in the Empire of Lies"- George Orwell)
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To: Tired of Taxes

There is a good amount of humor in IT work!

It is rich and fertile ground, no doubt...:)


51 posted on 09/28/2020 6:11:03 AM PDT by rlmorel ("Truth is Treason in the Empire of Lies"- George Orwell)
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To: rlmorel

We had a VP who refused to type in a password. If his machine rebooted, he had to call someone to come to type in his password. He was constantly sending us Info Week articles on alternatives to passwords like fingerprint readers. We fixed the problem by canceling his subscription to Info Week.

Our new head of Computer Security was also the head of the Diversity Initiative. He sent out a newsletter every month that was infected with a Word virus. Every month, we would have to clean machines that had accessed the document. He refused to believe he had a virus because, after all, he was the head of the Computer Security.


52 posted on 09/28/2020 6:37:29 AM PDT by AppyPappy (How many fingers am I holding up, Winston?)
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To: AppyPappy
Hahahahaha...there is so much to unpack in those two paragraphs you posted...

We were working on a project at work, and one of the people on my team sent me this, which I suspect you will appreciate!


53 posted on 09/28/2020 6:57:51 AM PDT by rlmorel ("Truth is Treason in the Empire of Lies"- George Orwell)
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To: rlmorel

54 posted on 09/28/2020 7:01:17 AM PDT by dfwgator (Endut! Hoch Hech!)
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To: NTHockey
LOLOL!!! give it to the noob...

did you ever put some oil/fluid on a rag and act like you were cleaning up a drip while said pilot was doing preflight?

55 posted on 09/28/2020 7:11:45 AM PDT by Chode (Send bachelors and come heavily armed.)
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To: dfwgator

THAT is one of my all time favorites!


56 posted on 09/28/2020 7:12:23 AM PDT by rlmorel ("Truth is Treason in the Empire of Lies"- George Orwell)
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To: nickcarraway

The REAL reason Carly Fiorino can’t get elected Dog Catcher:

Oh, so YOU’RE the one responsible for my damned HP printer!


57 posted on 09/28/2020 7:50:04 AM PDT by Buckeye McFrog (Patrick Henry would have been an anti-vaxxer.)
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To: erkelly

I know all too well. And good luck printing any graphics. LoL


58 posted on 09/28/2020 9:57:59 AM PDT by smokingfrog ( sleep with one eye open (<o> ---)
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To: logi_cal869

LOl, Yeah if it were up to me it’d be a laser printer! For myself I own a Brother Color Laser. It weighs about 40 pounds!


59 posted on 09/28/2020 6:56:32 PM PDT by prophetic (Trump is today's DANIEL. Shut the mouth of lions Lord, let his enemies be the Cat Food instead.)
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