Posted on 08/12/2015 4:45:02 AM PDT by rickmichaels
For Bethany Benson, 22, it should have been an uneventful drive back from her aunt’s house in Michigan to her own in Oshawa. It was August 2, 2010, around 5 p.m. With her boyfriend at the time behind the wheel, they crossed the border and she decided to stretch out as best she could in the confines of her mom’s 2002 Sunfire. She reclined the seat a little and propped her feet up on the dashboard, soon sleeping as the farmlands that lined Highway 402 outside of Strathroy, Ont., slipped past.
Bethany knows what happened next only through the accounts of other people. A small car and a motorcycle were involved in a collision that would eventually cost the motorcyclist his life; coming upon that crash, a transport truck driver would hit his brakes to avoid it; the Sunfire was travelling behind the transport with Bethany asleep in the passenger seat. As the brake lights flashed, her boyfriend desperately tried to avoid the suddenly stopping rig. He couldn’t.
Looking at photos of the Sunfire it’s hard to believe Bethany and her boyfriend survived. He would require 100 stitches, but Bethany would have her life altered forever because of one chance decision she made before nodding off.
She had put her feet on the dash.
A deployed airbag inflates at about 320 km/h. That’s a little faster than most Formula One cars race. This is what hit Bethany’s hamstrings, driving her knees into her face. Her left eye socket and cheekbone were broken, as was her nose. Her jaw was dislocated, a tooth cut through her lower lip and she would lose her spleen. Both feet were broken and compressed, and would eventually end up nearly 2 sizes smaller than they were before the crash. Her left pupil would remain permanently dilated affecting her vision, her hearing would remain altered and her memory would be wiped and rebooted like a faulty computer program. But perhaps the most dangerous injury would be the one her mother was told at the time not to worry about: a brain bleed.
Before August 2, 2010, Bethany Benson had been on her way to becoming a teacher. In September, she would be heading back to Trent University to finish her degrees in French and History, then on to a B. Ed in Teacher’s College. Instead, after a day on life support following the crash, she awoke no longer bilingual; she would have to relearn French, and even much of her English.
Four years later, the young woman sitting before me appears to be like any other 26-year-old. She matter-of-factly lists off the injuries she suffered, though sometimes coming back to things she’s left out. She was slated to have her first amateur boxing match that fall, proving herself to be more than a casual athlete. Kayaking, rollerblading, skating, snowboarding; she tells me surrendering her various gear in the year after the crash was difficult, a tangible acceptance of changes that would be permanent.
“Any shoes I wear have to have these special orthotics in them. They cost $450, and the shoes they fit cost $180. I had to get rid of my high heels, I know it sounds dumb…”
No, it doesn’t sound dumb. Along with losing so much of what many of us take for granted, she also lost most of her friends. That boyfriend who was driving is gone, and Bethany is still angry that he wasn’t charged. I tell her four years is a long time to carry around something she can’t change; when I ask her mother later how she feels towards the boy, she smiles and says she has no hard feelings at all.
That brain bleed? Bethany was no longer the Bethany she was before the crash. She says she could no longer do what her friends were doing; bars and clubs are physically draining, her hearing now ultra sensitive. Her mother adds more nuance.
“I got back a different daughter. I lost a sweet 22-year-old who worked full-time and put herself through university. She was on a great path. I got a 13-year-old with anger issues.” In the months immediately following the crash, Bethany would text people in the middle of the night. Texts that were angry and inappropriate, texts she doesn’t remember sending, but texts that many couldn’t see as a product of a damaged, changed brain. With fits of rage interspersed with understandable depressions, this Bethany is no longer that Bethany.
Mary Lachapelle is a housing co-ordinator with Durham Region. Brunette like her oldest daughter, she has a lovely smile that she uses often, though her words are tinged with a kind of resignation. Where Bethany has told me she realizes she will no longer be able to teach or do most of the sports she once loved, Mary has been forced to take a longer view.
“I have had to realize that my child will always live with me. We’ll have to find a house that affords us both some privacy and separation, but she is essentially a 13-year-old.”
’ve asked to speak with Mary for some perspective on Bethany’s life since the crash, and what the future may hold. It quickly becomes clear that everything Bethany must deal with in turn becomes something Mary must.
“There will be no early retirement. Bethany only has medical benefits through my work, and there’s no way I can let that go.” In the years since the crash, their days have been filled with lawyers and lawsuits and insurance companies as well as the medical fallout of a daughter who has suffered a major brain injury. Within that legal labyrinth, Bethany is actually suing her own mother. Mary shrugs with a wry smile; Bethany flinches as she tells me this. Insurance companies work in twisted ways sometimes.
In an odd footnote, Bethany had been involved in a collision on August 2, 2009 – exactly one year before this crash. A cab she was riding in in Toronto was t-boned. The legal fallout from that event has been folded into this one as lawyers and insurance adjustors argue over who will pay what to whom.
“They said the brain bleed would be absorbed back into her body. It seemed her physical injuries were the biggest problems,” says her mother. In retrospect, there are questions about what opportunities or treatments might have been lost because of this line of reasoning.
“My daughter is 26. I’m not legally able to know what meds she might be taking, or when. And yet, she is basically a 13-year-old, with all the immaturity and impulsiveness you would associate with that. She’s naive.” As we speak Bethany is sitting nearby texting madly on her phone, their 14-year-old Lhasa Apso, Max, at her feet. It is clear mother and daughter are close; it is also clear that Mary has had to support these myriad new problems and challenges while simultaneously grieving the loss of the child she once had.
In all of our exchanges and throughout our meeting, Bethany is adamant about getting out the message: everything she had, everything she was, changed because she put her feet up on that dash. Airbags and seatbelts are designed to save you, but you compromise that with something as mundane as improper and reclined seating positions. Bethany wants to be an advocate, be able to pass along the message to others who could benefit from all she has suffered.
Speaking with her mother, I sense an even broader message. With insurance companies putting a two-year cap on progress – a benchmark passed 2 years ago – Mary wonders if her daughter has reached her peak recovery.
“I don’t know if she’s improving, or if I’m just getting better at managing.”
My solution, in rush hour, is to tailgate aggressively, but be focused like a laser on both the car in front of me and the cars in front of him. The only caveat is whether or not my view of the car in front is compromised (e.g the car blocks my view because it is large). I rear ended someone in rush hour traffic back in 1977 because I looked away for a split second to change lanes - at the exact moment they hit the brakes. We were only doing about 10 mph, so it was nothing serious, but I learned from it.
While that is true, don’t put your feet on the dashboard, the real issue here was the boyfriend following to close to the truck he ran into. Had he followed a safe distance behind, none of this would have occurred.
I don’t think the boy frantically tried to avoid hitting it in the way we infer from the article. I think he looked up from his phone, his girlfriend, the cows on the side of the road, or whatever, and say an almost stopped truck rear end approaching and he was able to panic for a split second as he slammed into it. He could have been 20 car lengths behind it and that would actually explain this damage better.
Where I live, the implied speed limit is 15mph faster than the posted limit. If you drive the speed limit you create a traffic jam.
I get this from the cops I talk to.
You’ve exposed what I see as the real story here. I am constantly telling people that their air bag approaches their face at 200 mph.
I was going to say the real clulprit in this crash was the airbag - until I saw the damage to the car.
If you can’t get one of those stopped behind a truck, you’re following way too close.
I confess that since I don’t have TV I watch a lot of those “dash cam crash” youtube videos. I’ve seen a LOT of accidents where the camera (and I) see the cars ahead slam on the brakes, but the driver of the car doesn’t. They were at a VERY safe distance, except they were not looking ahead and BAM.
When you consider how much farther a semi takes to stop compared to a car, the young man should have been able to stop. Along with following too close, he probably wasn’t paying attention.
The length of the skid marks would be very telling.
I’m not defending people who block the fast lane and I’m not criticizing people who drive fast. Some fast drivers are very good drivers. I’m just saying please don’t tail-gate, for whatever reason your momentary anxiety might convince you is a good reason.
I am guilty of “using” tail-gaters to get a slow person out of my way. Let’s say I’m going 65 in the fast lane because all the cars in the slow lane are going 55 (just an example).
Then I come upon someone who is going 60 in the fast lane and not moving over.
I move right over to the right and let one of the tail-gaters (I only have to wait about 5 seconds) get rid of the person blocking. They do it by getting right on the person’s bumper, something I could never do in a million years.
Then the lane is clear again and I can speed back up.
And yes, if an 80mph person gets behind me when I’m doing 70mph, I move right over and let him pass. It’s not my job to enforce the speeding laws.
I’m just saying please don’t tail-gate, for whatever reason your momentary anxiety might convince you is a good reason.
Now, not all of them are playing games. Some are just really unskilled drivers afraid of corners. I get that. But some are OBVIOUSLY playing games - especially when they speed up when you are trying to pass. ;-)
I see other cars not as someONE to antagonize. I see them simply as someTHING to get around. As quickly, efficiently and safely as possible. I don’t want to antagonize their operator by needlessly tailgating. There is no point. I’m quote malevolent about it. I almost had a bumper sticker made up “To me, you are a pylon”, but decided it would be a ticket magnet.
The most dangerous thing about the public roads is the disparity in driving skills and driving motives. If you think the other drivers have the same skills and temperament as you it could cost you your life.
And yes, if an 80mph person gets behind me when I’m doing 70mph, I move right over and let him pass. It’s not my job to enforce the speeding laws.
Side story: Here in KY, the way people tend to drive badly is that they don’t use turn signals. When I lived in Seattle (drove there for 37 years) the MO was to camp out in the passing lane at the speed limit or lower. The proof is in an experience I had in central Montana.
We were coming back from a wedding on I-90 a few dozen miles west of billings and we, and a couple of other cars, were averaging around 95. We’d come upon cars doing 70 in the passing lane and most of them would pull over for us, but five didn’t and we all eventually passed them on the right.
Of those five cars, four had Washington state plates. It was high comedy. :-D
Anyone who speeds up just to prevent you from passing them deserves to be shot. But that’s just my opinion and I’m not advocating it.
Wow. 95. That’s pretty fast. I’ve driven that fast in Nevada just to feel what it’s like but I’d be nervous doing it for long stretches.
More power to you!
Anyone who speeds up just to prevent you from passing them deserves to be shot. But that’s just my opinion and I’m not advocating it.
It’s not as dangerous as one thinks. The car coming the other way always slows down or starts heading for the shoulder - even when they don’t need to. I’ve had oncoming cars flash their lights at me (indicating they thought my passing was dangerous) when, in fact, it was several seconds before they passed my car.
As I said earlier, there is great variance between drivers in skill.
There is greatvarian ein skill and a great variance in courtesy and common sense. Courtesy and common sense go hand-in-hand.
Wow. 95. That’s pretty fast.
We were driving the 300m on that trip. On another trip we were coming out of North Dakota on I-94 and a couple of guy’s in Jeep Cherokees with Minnesota plates wanted to play games. They would try to cut me off as we passed trucks. They would speed past me and then, as they approached a truck would slow down. I’d pass them on the right and get past them before they got to the truck each time.
I would pass the truck and back down to 80. They would then pass me and, as we approached the next truck, they would start slowing down. One time I really had to floor it because the guy was speeding up trying really hard to cut me off. but made it.
After that, they both passed me and got side by side and dropped to 50 mph. At which point I simply passed them on the shoulder. This ticked them off. I decided they were not going to pass me any more.
Every time they approached me I ramped up my speed. Eventually I got tired of it and floored it. My speedometer only went to 120, but there was a BIG gap between that and the peg that stops the needle. It was pegged.
Now, their cars have governors at 105, so I figured a few miles would do the trick after I lost them. Nope. I backed down to 90 and it wasn’t long before they were right behind me again. I did this three times and finally just floored it for about 30 miles (it goes by fast at 142). I finally slowed down and took an off ramp to get gas and be around people. Never saw the guys again.
To be clear, that area of I-94 in Montana near North Dakota is very barren. You can see for miles up the road - most of the time.
There is greatvarian ein skill and a great variance in courtesy and common sense. Courtesy and common sense go hand-in-hand.
Yep. He probably reacted by standing on the brake.
I miss driving in the west. The west is the best.
Yep. He probably reacted by standing on the brake.
I miss driving in the west. The west is the best.
Exactly right. Low IQ idiot driver. It is HIS fault she is in the condition she is in.
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