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Perks of being over 60
September 9, 2014

Posted on 09/09/2014 7:36:46 PM PDT by NKP_Vet

THE PERKS OF BEING OVER 60 1) Kidnappers are not very interested in you. 2) In a hostage situation you are likely to be released first. 3) No one expects you to run -- anywhere. 4) People call at 9 PM and ask, "Did I wake you?" 5) People no longer view you as a hypochondriac. 6) There is nothing left to learn the hard way. 7) Things you buy now won't wear out. 8) You can eat dinner at 4 P.M. 9) You can live without sex but not without your glasses. 10) You enjoy hearing about other peoples operations. 11) You get into heated arguments about pension plans. 12) You no longer think of speed limits as a challenge. 13) You quit trying to hold your stomach in, no matter who walks into the room. 14) You sing along with elevator music. 15) Your eyes won't get much worse. 16) Your investment in health insurance is finally beginning to pay off. 17) Your joints are more accurate meteorologists than the national weather service. 18) Your secrets are safe with your friends because they can't remember them either. 19) Your supply of brain cells is finally down to manageable size. 20) You can't remember the email where you saw this list.


TOPICS: Humor
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1 posted on 09/09/2014 7:36:46 PM PDT by NKP_Vet
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To: NKP_Vet

Every time I think about stocking up on something, I realize I already have enough to last me the rest of my life. That is not meant to be so much amusing as true.


2 posted on 09/09/2014 7:45:08 PM PDT by yarddog (Romans 8: verses 38 and 39. "For I am persuaded".)
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To: NKP_Vet

I identify with this.

Will be 67 in December.


3 posted on 09/09/2014 7:45:14 PM PDT by Texas Fossil (Texas is not where you were born, but a Free State of Heart, Mind & Attitude!)
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To: NKP_Vet

Nothing left to learn the hard way... Got that one, fer sure.


4 posted on 09/09/2014 7:47:04 PM PDT by wastoute (Government cannot redistribute wealth. Government can only redistribute poverty.)
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To: Texas Fossil

I will be 69 In June here. Lord willing.

well now it’s off to bed...


5 posted on 09/09/2014 7:47:54 PM PDT by MeshugeMikey (Please RESIGN Mr. President Its the RIGHT thing to do_RETIRE THE REGIME!)
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To: NKP_Vet

An today I turned 60 .......:o)

Timely indeed ..... Not much mileage but a bunch of sudden stops.

Stay safe !


6 posted on 09/09/2014 7:48:00 PM PDT by Squantos ( Be polite, be professional, but have a plan to kill everyone you meet ...)
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To: NKP_Vet
THE PERKS OF BEING OVER 60

1) Kidnappers are not very interested in you.

2) In a hostage situation you are likely to be released first.

3) No one expects you to run -- anywhere.

4) People call at 9 PM and ask, "Did I wake you?"

5) People no longer view you as a hypochondriac.

6) There is nothing left to learn the hard way.

7) Things you buy now won't wear out.

8) You can eat dinner at 4 P.M.

9) You can live without sex but not without your glasses.

10) You enjoy hearing about other peoples operations.

11) You get into heated arguments about pension plans.

12) You no longer think of speed limits as a challenge.

13) You quit trying to hold your stomach in, no matter who walks into the room.

14) You sing along with elevator music.

15) Your eyes won't get much worse.

16) Your investment in health insurance is finally beginning to pay off.

17) Your joints are more accurate meteorologists than the national weather service.

18) Your secrets are safe with your friends because they can't remember them either.

19) Your supply of brain cells is finally down to manageable size.

20) You can't remember the email where you saw this list

You're welcome!

7 posted on 09/09/2014 7:48:04 PM PDT by hole_n_one
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To: NKP_Vet
THE PERKS OF BEING OVER 60
1) Kidnappers are not very interested in you.
2) In a hostage situation you are likely to be released first.
3) No one expects you to run -- anywhere.
4) People call at 9 PM and ask, "Did I wake you?"
5) People no longer view you as a hypochondriac.
6) There is nothing left to learn the hard way.
7) Things you buy now won't wear out.
8) You can eat dinner at 4 P.M.
9) You can live without sex but not without your glasses.
10) You enjoy hearing about other peoples operations.
11) You get into heated arguments about pension plans.
12) You no longer think of speed limits as a challenge.
13) You quit trying to hold your stomach in, no matter who walks into the room.
14) You sing along with elevator music.
15) Your eyes won't get much worse.
16) Your investment in health insurance is finally beginning to pay off.
17) Your joints are more accurate meteorologists than the national weather service.
18) Your secrets are safe with your friends because they can't remember them either.
19) Your supply of brain cells is finally down to manageable size. 
20) You can't remember the email where you saw this list.

8 posted on 09/09/2014 7:48:57 PM PDT by Texas Fossil (Texas is not where you were born, but a Free State of Heart, Mind & Attitude!)
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To: MeshugeMikey

Will be doing the same soon.

Have put in a very busy day.

Rest well my FRiend.


9 posted on 09/09/2014 7:50:33 PM PDT by Texas Fossil (Texas is not where you were born, but a Free State of Heart, Mind & Attitude!)
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To: hole_n_one

You beat me. hee hee hee


10 posted on 09/09/2014 7:51:44 PM PDT by Texas Fossil (Texas is not where you were born, but a Free State of Heart, Mind & Attitude!)
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To: Texas Fossil

Rest well...5:30 comes earlier every few weeks...


11 posted on 09/09/2014 7:52:33 PM PDT by MeshugeMikey (Please RESIGN Mr. President Its the RIGHT thing to do_RETIRE THE REGIME!)
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To: Texas Fossil

>6) There is nothing left to learn the hard way.

not if you are constantly trying new stuff. like how to clone Win 7 using sysprep without corrupting the bcd store.

62 last Feb.


12 posted on 09/09/2014 8:01:00 PM PDT by RitchieAprile
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To: hole_n_one; Texas Fossil

21. People will format FR posts for you.


13 posted on 09/09/2014 8:02:04 PM PDT by Slings and Arrows ("Country Songs Don't Have Happy Endings" - http://youtu.be/W93nc95j1KY)
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To: RitchieAprile

Yeah, it should be: “There’s nothing left to learn the hard way except what you choose.”
And it IS harder to learn than when I was younger- have to literally beat new things into my head,


14 posted on 09/09/2014 8:08:27 PM PDT by mrsmith (Dumb sluts: Lifeblood of the Media, Backbone of the Democrat Party!)
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To: NKP_Vet

22. Every day is Christmas when you find things you didn’t know you already have.


15 posted on 09/09/2014 8:19:39 PM PDT by alpo (What would Selco do?)
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To: Squantos

HAPPY BIRTHDAY !!

Enjoy your day


16 posted on 09/09/2014 8:20:23 PM PDT by Patriot Babe
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To: NKP_Vet

Funny stuff. Thanks for posting. Yes, I too am over sixty. I think it was Hemingway who said, never pick a fight with an old guy, because he’ll probably just up and shoot you. Well, that quote could be apocryphal. I couldn’t find it anywhere. But as a sixty year old, it makes sense to me.


17 posted on 09/09/2014 8:27:00 PM PDT by Springfield Reformer (Winston Churchill: No Peace Till Victory!)
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To: Slings and Arrows

18 posted on 09/09/2014 8:28:24 PM PDT by hole_n_one
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To: Slings and Arrows

LOL!


19 posted on 09/09/2014 8:29:36 PM PDT by smokingfrog ( sleep with one eye open (<o> ---)
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To: Squantos

I am 60 and a half. I was eighteen when Alice Cooper sang, “I’m Eighteen!”. (And so were you.) Happy Birthday!


20 posted on 09/09/2014 8:29:55 PM PDT by HandyDandy (Started out with Burgundy but soon hit the harder stuff....)
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