Posted on 07/24/2013 12:41:50 PM PDT by JoeProBono
John Morillo, a 47-year-old Canadian man, acknowledged that it was "really stupid" of him to drink eight beers and swim across the Detroit River on Monday night. However, he is glad that he actually made it.
“If I’m going to be in the paper, I’d at least like them to say I actually made it, even though I got in trouble and everything,” he told The Windsor Star Tuesday. “I gotta pay fines and stuff. But I don’t want it to sound like I didn’t make it, because then my buddies are going to say ‘ha, ha, you didn’t make it.’ Because that was the whole thing, to show them I could do it.”
Morillo, who had been planning to swim across the river for years, began his journey by jumping in the river near Hiram Walker in Windsor, Ontario, Canada on Monday night.
“I was drinking, but I wasn’t really drunk,” he said. “The thing is, I’ve been telling people I’m going to swim across the river for years ... last night I just decided it was the time to go.”
A neighbor of Morillo's, who wanted to witness the swim, reported the stunt to police after having lost sight of him for over half an hour.
Police then notified the Canadian and U.S. coast guards and three helicopters were deployed to search the area. The U.S. guard found him at around 12:50 a.m. swimming on the Canadian side, just west of the Hilton Hotel.
Morillo explained that he made it all the way to the Renaissance Center, got out of the water and posed for pictures with a few people before swimming back and being apprehended by authorities. He added that by the time he heard the helicopters he knew he had done something stupid.
The 47-year-old was charged with being intoxicated in a public place and will probably be fined for swimming in a shipping channel. The Windsor’s harbor master said the fine could go from $5,000 to $25,000. He spent the night in jail and was released on Tuesday.
Authorities told Morillo that swimming in the Detroit River is “extremely dangerous” because of the strong undertow in the shipping channel. He said that both the harbor master and his mother were extremely mad at him.
In the end, he learned his lesson.
“I never should have done it. I’ve been telling people I could swim across the river for 20 years and they all laughed at me, and I finally did it. But I would not suggest anybody do it. There are giant fines for doing it, crossing the shipping lanes. It’s just really stupid and I apologize for all the people that had to go out looking for me,” he said.
Yes, that would be the Hiram Walker distillery. The river is about a mile wide and the Ren-Cen is about a mile down river from Walker’s. The current alone took him that far down river.
He was DRUNK... I mean, why would anyone in their RIGHT MIND swim To DETROIT?
“Canadian man sorry for chugging eight beers and swimming to Detroit.” Well, duh - who wouldn’t regret ending up in Detroit?
No, the tunnel customs agents are real pricks..........
Considering the fact that beer gives you infinite wisdom and superhuman strength, I think he made the right decision. However, since he was the first one to ever be caught, it's obvious he didn't drink enough.
That Canadian beer is a bit stronger than the beer in the US.
Molson’s used to have some great ads.
The Molson truck driver loaded and stopped at the border was great.
Customs: What’s behind the seat sir?
Driver: Uh, the whole rest of the truck.
On Google maps it looks like it was a little more than 1.5 miles with the current for the first leg of the trip. They don’t say where he ended up back in Canada, but if you assume another 1.5 miles, that’s 0.375 miles per beer... Not bad!
The argument continues...
Molson Red Label or Molson Golden?
While I consider them both “skunk” beer, I fall on the Red Label side because it gets you hammered faster.
Eh?
And don’t get me started on the geese!
They are “Canada Geese” not Canadian Geese and they poop everywhere! If there didn’t taste so good pan-seared and roasted, I’d rather see them wiped from the face of the Earth!
And NO! I’m not opinionated!
So we declare the Rio Grande a shipping channel.
Then we can arrest andfine the illegals coming across $25000.
That’ll stop that.
“That Canadian beer is a bit stronger than the beer in the US.”
No - US beer is more than a bit weaker than beer everywhere else...the brewski on my desk is 8.5% - seems just right!
We didn't........
a Bob and Doug McKenzie photo might be more appropriate
Don’t mess with the Zohan!
I wonder if anyone asked him if he was a fleshy headed mutant when he climbed out of the river?
Good thing muslims can`t drink beer
and don`t know how to swim.
Dude! That GIF ate up a bunch of bandwidth!
I thought the fines were for “leaving” Detroit, not entering.
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