Posted on 07/29/2012 5:51:06 PM PDT by Lazamataz
DO NOT EVER DO THIS.
I met a fellow about 7 years ago in the rooms of Narcotics Anonymous. He was getting cleaned up; so was I. We became fast friends. Soon, I was helping him out, and he was helping me.
Sometimes I loaned him money -- a lot -- and sometimes he loaned it to me. Once, I loaned him my car for some jobn interviews. Everything went well.
He contacted me recently and asked if I could rent him a car. "Why can't you rent it?" I asked. Well, he had a valid license but not a physical copy of it. Sure, I replied. I can do it.
I rented the car for him from Enterprise. He paid for the whole deal, including the extended insurance (which I demanded he do). Four days pass, the car needs to be returned or re-rented. No problem, he comes with more money and we re-rent it. Four more days pass, and I contact him. No answers. I call him all day. No answers. Now I am getting worried.
I go to where his last address was, and his girlfriend answers (also in the program of recovery) and she says he moved out some time back. She hints he's returned to using. Now I am getting REALLY worried.
I call and call and call. The next day, I go to Enterprise, and they inform me that because he is an unauthorised driver, no coverage will be afforded me under the insurance. I may be 100% civilly liable. They instruct me to report the car stolen. I call Chamblee police, and an officer comes. Police are always suspicious, and this one is too, telling me "my story does not add up" (but it did! It is what happened!) and informing me that I could and would be charged with a FELONY (Theft by Conversion) if the car is not returned by nightfall.
The guy is still not answering. I might be in SERIOUS trouble for being an idiot -- not for truly being a criminal.
The next day he answers, finally. Tells me not to panic, that the car is fine. I tell him HE and I will BOTH be charged with a felony and that we may be already. He shrugs it off ... "No big deal. I've had felonies before."
Yeah, a comment like that, he's definitely using again.
He promises to get the car to me. I wait at home, calling every fifteen minutes. Excuse after excuse on why he's not there yet. Finally, he stops answering again. Oh crap.
A day passes, I'm reaching out to my 12 step friends to locate him. One person saw him in an apartment complex. I stake it out for a while. No luck.
Another day passes. Enterprise calls me, they tell me they haven't issued a warrant yet, but this will be the final day.
So I start thinking like an addict. I was one, I know how they think. The only interest they (used to be me, too) have is their next hit. BINGO. I text him that I will offer him 100's in cash to bring the car back.
Suddenly he calls. He's willing. I tell him to meet me at my place of employment, where there are armed security guards. He pulls in, he's got 2 friends with him. Hmmm. I lure him out of the car by putting the cash on the ground. He gets out, I get in and order the friends out. The dude says, "Aren't you at least going to drive us somewhere?" Hell no. I'm in sight of armed guards right now, this is where they get out. I let them know they need to leave. I wave to the security guards, they wave back. They had no idea what was going on, but the wave convinced the hoodlums to leave.
This was the most terrifying week I have had in a long time. I was certain I was going to be jailed, with little prospect of an immediate bond, and a loss of job, and a felony accusation that my attorney told me was likely to stick.
All because I was too nice, too naive, and just plain stupid.
Don't let anything like this happen to you. I aged about 5 years.
I would loan money to someone in the program, but I would do so with no expectation to be repaid, and limit the amount accordingly.
I enjoy your posts, but loaning out a rental car car is insane!
You may be a brilliant web and code designer, but consult me before you make any other business decisions. I'm rather good at it.
They say it's better to be lucky than good, but I like going with a bit of both. Very smooth getting the car back.
Thanks for the story. Sometimes I think I screwed up moving so far away, then I'll hear something like what you wrote and it clears my head and snaps me back to reality.
It had nothing to do with co-signing. It had to do with character evaluation. And while “trusting no one” sounds nice on paper, it makes for a pretty shitty world. So, human beings take risks on their hearts. And learn.
Karma can be a real bitch. If you were a user, it’s pretty likely you stomped on some hearts - hard. I’d say, while shooting rubber bands at the slowly rotating ceiling fan, smoking a cigar and sipping scotch, that that’s probably your reflection point here. Who’d you hurt - and how badly?
You got scared - but you were given the inspiration of how to save your skinny butt, just in the nick of time. That’s Grace.
You can’t give up on people, because if you do, you’re giving up on yourself.
On the other hand, holding most of them in an electrified pen under 24 hour armed guard on a barge in the middle of the Atlantic isn’t such a bad idea, either.
Congratulations on going straight - and welcome back to the challenge of being human.
Can I borrow your car?
/johnny
Wow. The alcoholics are complacent and sedentary? I guess that is where “beer bellies” come from.
I guess in some cases paying the junkies to go away is more effective but if they know where you live they would probably keep coming back, wouldn’t they?
We’ve been feeding a homeless cat and it just sort of sticks around. I bet it would stick around for a while after we stop feeding it, and become really noisy too.
I hope the people who help and minister to these people know enough to keep themselves safe.
Ignorance is bliss -- knowing about the theft charges would have made it much more of a nightmare for me.
The best part of your story is that you're still clean! It's all that really matters.
A lot of people in recovery from drugs and alcohol also need to go to Al-anon. That’s where I learned to detach from the qualifier but also be compassionate and supportive without enabling him or being taken in. Very important skills.
Your Honor, I concede the point.
I enjoy your posts, but loaning out a rental car car is insane!
I had the mistaken impression that the extended insurance covers it when you loan out the rental car. I heard of cases of that, but on further inspection, it's for immediate spouses and coworkers (on business related travel).
Yeah. The company makes a demand for return (usually by certified letter), in my case it was verbal and in front of the officer..... and 5 days later, if it's not there, you get Theft by Conversion. Felony for the amounts we are talking. Your ignorance wouldn't have stopped the charge.
I made it just under the five day window.
"Pick Enterprise. We'll pick you up."
"And, when we do, we'll throw your a** in jail."
"Behold I send you as sheep in the midst of wolves. Be ye therefore wise as serpents and simple as doves." Matthew 10:16
“...while shooting rubber bands at the slowly rotating ceiling fan, smoking a cigar and sipping scotch...”
I had to get up and go look at hubby to make sure he wasn’t posting this.
No. I need my car. Let's rent one for you!
I'll help you move, drive out to bring gas, but that is it.
Glad you came out ok. Kick that guys ass if the chance presents.
You sound like a great guy and have nothing to be sorry for...
It’s the bozo who used you who will screw himself in the end...you did your best.
I totally agree about legal risk...
Don’t even do it for a family member, no way!
You have a good heart. But you need to ask more questions of those who ask high risk favors. No physical copy of a DL? $25 and a couple of keystrokes? How difficult is one’s life without a DL?
But we have all done this sort of thing. Maybe not up to the point nearly getting charged with grand theft auto...but certainly trusting the wrong person with a good bit more than we can afford to lose.
WOW.
I was such a good crazy maker. I brought chaos to the most stable people in my life. Amen on the recovered(ing) part. I can usually spot one quickly and steer very clear but occasionally there are more screwed up folks out there than we were.
Was this whole incident some kind of challenge, test or temptation? You cant go wrong turning to the Word. Keep your powder dry.
Give heartfelt thanks for His grace and blessings and praise Him always!
Laz, in all these years, this is a whole side of you I’ve never heard nor seen.
Glad it worked out okay. But you take care of yourself, hear?? (”Hittin it” is one thing, but being played is a whole nuther thing).
I just won't cosign for them under any circumstances. If Jesus Christ himself returns and asks me to rent a car, I'm telling him to get his gaw-damned license and rent it himself.
If it had been me, I'd need to be doing laundry twice a day for 5 days. For pants, anyway.
Yes I was and yes I did. One was a FR lady who married me.
That is what 8th, 9th, and 10th steps are about, however.
How are you at allocating 401K funds? :^)
Thanks for sharing your story. For sure, lessons to be learned from this. I wish you continued success as you continue on life’s journey.
That is exactly my policy with the aforementioned family member. Now when I bail her out of a jam and she says she'll pay me back, I tell her it's a gift and not a loan. Much more clean that way.
And I say "no" a lot more often.
....and what is it with cars and you here lately? Didnt you have one stolen a few months back?
It only occured to me because I used to be an active addict. I know how the active addicted mind thinks.
The Promises of AA apply here: "We will not regret the past nor wish to shut the door on it."
It was only because of my past that I knew what to do.
I got that car recovered about a month later, missing the stereo. It was about 50 miles south of Atlanta.
Laz, that is quite a riveting story. Thinking of the 100 dollar bills as a lure was pure genius. Glad you’re OK.
Cheers
I was curious, so looked it up:
Pr.11:15
He who puts up security for another will surely suffer, but whoever refuses to strike hands in pledge is safe. (NIV)
Pr.17:18
A man lacking in judgment strikes hands in pledge and puts up security for his neighbor. (NIV)
the human race is highly overrated......
People in these programs work the system, I wouldn't trust a god-damned one one of them, you might help one or two who were worth helping the rest are future gutter trash, working the system.
I'm taking certain precautions. I advise no one to surprise me when I'm going to my car in the morning. No surprise birthday parties. Just so everyone is safe.
There are armed guards and an elaborate system of security at work. No issues there.
My wife made the mistake of cosigning a loan for a "friend" at work, $2000,00 later it was paid off. A hard lesson to learn. nice guy's like you (who knew ;-D) learn the hard way .
Freegards, CTYankee.
I'm not that smart to think it up. I am experienced, is all.
...at which point I would have hit him. And not in the goatse.
***
You can't trust anyone, not even your relatives and friends. Doesn't matter if they have issues or not.
Months ago I loaned money to a friend. She and I have been friends for years. Stupid me, I didn't get anything in writing. Well, she hasn't repaid me a dime. What irks me is she has a well paying job and I'm not working. I could use the money. But all I get from her is excuses. About the only thing I can do now is distance myself from her and not make the same mistake again.
>> Right in Proverbs it tells you not to put your name on someone elses debt. I’m following the instructions from now on.
Good call, Laz.
The Man who created us creatures and our playground (and wrote the user’s manual for them) knows how His stuff really works. He never gives bad advice!
And just by the way — your post from a month or so ago about how and why we should forgive each other — because we’re all “God’s kids” and you wouldn’t diss one of your friend’s kids, let alone the Almighty’s — really resonated. I find it useful in my daily walk.
Sorry for your close call and glad it came out (more or less) OK.
God bless you and FRegards
I'm glad you didn't take offense. Please mail me if you have a question about small business practices. Bear in mind I live in New Jersey. We have a permit to pay or the law against everything. Now juxtaposition intended
I was future gutter trash too.
Right up until I decided not to be.
Of course I didn’t take offense. I WAS a stupid f*&#.
I think it's accurate to say, if your past were different, you probably would never have crossed paths with this good fellow in the first place, Laz.
If I were me, and I am, I would Thank God.
It seems he gave you exactly what you needed. No more, no less. You are very fortunate, my friend.
May ALL of us learn from our own experiences, as well as you have from this.
Send me your friends name. There’s still the matter of the outstanding rental bill at Enterprise. 371, if I remember the figure. LOL!
I’ve enjoyed our phone conversations.
Interesting how many familiar names I’ve seen on this thread.
Two-hours-away-from-a-felony-warrent fortunate.
God likes to be dramatic when it comes to me. He uses a 2x4 to get the idea across.
Mercat is right. Alanon would be a good idea.
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