Posted on 02/18/2017 12:12:20 PM PST by John Semmens
CNN president Jeff Zucker admitted that “having the President of the United States impugn our integrity at every opportunity has battered the psyches of many of our network’s employees. We are the ones who determine the facts. We are the ones who impugn the integrity of those who don’t advance the progressive agenda. Trump’s rejection of our traditional role is a reversal that has hit us hard.”
“Our morale since that black day in November has been in the dumpster,” Zucker observed. “But we are turning it around. Thanks to a suggestion emailed to us by a viewer, we have instituted a daily ‘two-minute hate’ of Trump that has seemed to revive flagging spirits around the network. Wolf and Jake tell me it that it’s like a hit of crack that has helped restore their focus and given them the energy to persevere in our mission.”
“I don’t like to think of myself as someone who can hate another person,” CNN reporter Jake Tapper said. “It’s not a feeling I came close to experiencing in eight years of covering the Obama Administration. Not even the Republicans inspired such an intense animosity. They were powerless and cowed by the fear that a bad report from us could destroy their reputations. There was no need to hate them, but Trump, obviously, is different. The daily hate is energizing. My biggest regret is that we didn’t think of doing this before this monster was elected.”
In related news, veteran White House correspondent for American Urban Radio Networks April Ryan’s accusation that Trump adviser Omarosa Manigault intimidated her was quashed after Manigault revealed that “interactions with reporters are routinely recorded.” Ryan called the recording “an unfair tactic intended to abridge freedom of the press. It’s unconstitutional and freaking Nixonian. If this doesn’t persuade Congress to impeach the man I don’t know what will.”
if you missed any of this week's other semi-news/semi-satire posts you can find them at...
https://azconservative.org/2017/02/18/dems-plan-to-block-trumps-immigration-policy/
ping
CNN reporter Jake Tapper said. “It’s not a feeling I came close to experiencing in eight years of covering FOR the Obama Administration. that’s better
Somebody please tell that schmuck that “1984” is a novel, not an instruction manual!
***eyes-rolling***
Must be some 5-year Expiration on their Viagra/Cialis/Levitra medications.
“Thanks to a suggestion emailed to us by a viewer...”
That right there was LOL funny! Thanks, John!
I can totally believe that!
CNN president Jeff Zucker admitted that “having the President of the United States impugn our integrity at every opportunity has battered the psyches of many of our network’s employees.
Good!! The truth hurts...no matter who you are. The Corrupt News Network started the BS and now they reap what they sowed...a kick in the crotch. Well deserved.
Wonder if they will consider the obvious and CHANGE!
No, never. They are elitist, all important, purveyors of the news and can never be at fault for anything. After all, they do it for the better good of us all.
The Liberal media have been this way for decades. I think longer.
I have watched closely as the local newspapers have gotten more and more liberal and one sided to the point where I cannot stand it any longer. Likewise with the local news.
Now they make up news and then pretend to be offended when they are caught and pretend that we are not paying attention to their lies and misstatements.
All true. You hit the nail on the head.
This satire people. Sheesh.
Simple minds work in strange ways.
Good stuff
They still have viewers?
Not viewers. *A* viewer.
And s/he sent a suggestion! for improvement! LOL.
Two minutes of hate per day is all most of them can manage.
1984 bump! Again hard to tell the difference between truth and satire...
Good job John!
“Return to 1984”
Would be a good title for a new moderate left TV series on HBO.
Did Zucker call out Obama when he continually bashed Fox (Faux) News for eight years?
Didn’t think so.
Good job. Cant wait for the next Purge Movie where all the on air so called Talent at CNN get wiped out by gang of crazed Trumpsters. LOL
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