Posted on 09/05/2001 7:32:33 AM PDT by SAMWolf
-- Your friend finds a poisonous snake on her porch and wants to share her fear and all you can think is, wow, what a great unit study that would make.
-- Your kid gets science credit for having a tooth filled at the dentist.
-- You can't decide between Greek and Latin or Greek and Astronomy for 9th grade.
-- Your three year old is jealous of your four year old's reading abilities.
-- Phys. Ed. means riding bikes in the basement.
-- Divinity, By Jove, Yahtzee and Rummy Roots form a significant part of your curriculum.
--Your kids can send e-mails or design e-cards for Language Arts.
-- Your husband planted 250 trees and is in a panic because the crew didn't show up to white wash and water the trees, so you send out the kids with their paintbrushes and call it art, p.e. and science.
-- You reach in your purse to write a check and find only pencils...no pens.
-- Someone asks your daughter her name and she replies--- "Katie...with a K... a hard C sounds like a K...a soft C sounds like an S...a soft G sounds like a J...blah, blah, blah"... and she proceeds to tell them all of the phonics rules she knows.
-- You have a dream involving both babies and homeschool curriculum.
-- All you want for Christmas is a gift certificate to your local book store.
-- Some days you learn as much as your students.
-- You bring your children for an emergency shopping trip during recess.
-- Your children exchange Valentines with the children of your e-mail pen-pals.
-- Your five year old can read and knows the names of a dozen states, but doesn't know who Bart Simpson or the Rugrats are.
-- You're on a first name basis with the UPS Driver, the librarian and the book store owner.
-- Your three year old learns new words from his big sister's spelling lessons.
-- The principal can kiss the teacher without getting sued for harassment
-- You don't get fired for teaching your students about God.
-- You shop for Birthday presents at educational stores.
-- Your backyard doubles as a science lab. So does your kitchen.
-- Your daughter, who is practically a vegetarian, is begging her dad to hunt some starlings so she can pluck them and clean them up to make a "blackbird" pie just like the Ingalls family
-- Your preschoolers learn to count by helping to make rosaries.
-- You can throw your school stuff in a box and your children in a van and accompany your husband on a business trip.
-- Your formal dining room looks like a combination library and office, with maps and timelines all over the walls.
-- Your children dress as Laura Ingalls, Charlemagne or Mother Teresa for Halloween.
-- You go to All Saints Day parties instead of Halloween parties.
-- You have mold growing in your fridge...on purpose.
-- Talking out loud to yourself is a parent/teacher conference.
--You can't make it through a movie without pointing out all the historical errors and deviations from the book.
-- You step on math manipulatives in your predawn stumble to the bathroom.
-- You can't make it through the produce section of your grocery store without asking your preschooler the name and color of every fruit and vegetable.
-- Whenever you see a group of families during school hours, especially if the girls are wearing dresses and smiling, you suspect that you've stumbled into some other homeschoolers.
-- You'd rather buy books than clothes.
-- You plan your family's vacation around the nearest homeschool conference.
-- You live in a one-house schoolroom.
Here are some I found on the web (edited)you might be homeschooled if...:
You come to school in your PJ's.
Your biology lab consists of assisting in your sibling's birth.
Your stacks of books to check out is taller than the librarian.
Your PE comes from chasing little toddlers around.
Your school bus is a 9 passenger van.
You consider school work after lunch to be cruel and unusual punishment.
Your father has ever told the check-out lady at Wal-mart, "We're on a field trip."
Your teacher has ever written your report card on a napkin.
You have to move dirty laundry off your desk before your can start school.
The signatures on your diploma all end with the same last name.
Everyone else in the world is referred to as "Non-homies."
Your first real date is on your honeymoon.
The word 'homework' sounds like an foreign language.
Your yearbook is also your babybook.
A snow day means that you shovel the driveway after you finish your school work.
You enjoy the pastime of watching public school kids walk home from school.
You have to look at the clock to see if you can call your public school friends yet.
You have to decide what year you want to graduate.
The teacher can kiss the principal, and no one thinks it's unusual.
You get to school and the teacher asks you if you've done all your chores.
Russ :)
She went and met her son's so-to-be kindergarten teacher and was alarmed by streaked-and-spiked red hair and 4 inch high-heels. She was terrified of the "whole language" approach to reading. Kid has her priorities right.
"Everyone is a homeschooler who has children"
WWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWW
Professer....of all people ( hehehe...)you should know that the words "always", "everyone", "never"....etc..etc. Are usually proved wrong.
Unfortunately, ''everyone'' who has children is NOT a homeschooler....too many sheeple today expect and sometimes DEMAND that the government teach AND raise their children..with near zero oversight by the legal parents.
FWIW
Russ
- your kids may never know what to pay for an ounce of dope.(while living in your house)
- your kids will have a worth while education.
- your kids will be able to hold an intelligent conversation with both types of people (young & old).
- your kids will respect you in your aged condition & before.
Thanks. I never looked at it that way.
I 'd like to nominate this for "Quote of the Day"
This is pretty close to my standard response whenever I hear the question:
"What about your child's socialization?"
Russ
never was a truer word spoken, also not everyone who has children should, to bring it further, some should be barred from procreating at all and some chronologically advanced biological units should be candidates for retro-active abortion.
Don't you just love the data sheet that that all the nay sayers sing from (my parents included, in the begining) that the kids will be social retards. I will still match mine with anyone their ages.
Do my children know gang gestures? No.
Do my children know memorize rap songs about killing cops? No.
Do my children despise authority? No.
etc, etc, etc
Russ
Your kid rips a historian's PhD to shreds in a 25-page paper, prepared in full MLA style, footnoted, with a 11-page bibliography attached, all without a single error in spelling, grammar, punctuation, or factual content--before his 14th birthday.
Your 17-year-old kid gets a 1550 SAT score, aces his GED exam, and gets rejected from 50 different universities for having published all 170 of his thesis rebuttals on his own website, www.who-gave-these-idiots-tenure.com.
YOU! OVER THERE! OUT OF THE GENE POOL!
Sorry about that...As I was saying, there are entirely too many folks who SHOULD have kids not having them, and entirely many who SHOULDN'T have kids having them.
"Unfortunately, ''everyone'' who has children is NOT a homeschooler...."
I agree with the first statement. Everyone who has kids is homeschoooling, kids learn from what they observe at home, be it good or bad.
Perhaps there is hope.
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